I am sitting in bed as my sick little poppet sleeps next to me. His temp peaked at 39.8 an hour ago and I still can't really get it to go down. I hope he's better by tomorrow :-(
I'm pretty unimpressed with Australia Post. I helped dd write a letter to Santa and sent it off as their website says well within the timeframe a couple of weeks ago. The postie has just gone straight past our house, Christmas Eve and no reply from 'santa' to be seen.
Luckily she's still a bit young to be asking where her letter is. Looks like I'm typing one up tonight for her stocking
I am feeling like the world's biggest idiot. Banished to a ****ing tiny bathroom to wrap presents because FOB doesn't want me to wake up DS and he wants to watch Home Alone. Yep, wrapping presents to pretend that they are on behalf of both of us. Presents that I, of course, chose and paid for, including a thoughtful gift for FOB from DS. No presents for me in this pile, not even from DS.
What happened to the strong, confident woman that wouldn't let herself be banished to a ****ing bathroom, and that wouldn't let anyone make her feel less than or pathetic? That woman is far away from here.
And why am doing all this? Spending money I don't have on an experience that no one wants in the first place? So my son will have 'happy family memories'. My sick son who doesn't really gaf anyway. It's all for an illusion of a reality that doesn't exist, and hasn't for quite some time.
So I will continue to sit on a mangy cushion on a probably filthy bathroom floor, being summonsed every now and then go and resettle DS when he surfaces from his feverish slumber because he 'probably wants you anyway', and grit my teeth because I love Christmas dammit and if I'm not having a good time I will definitely try to fake it til I make it.
Not feeling very Catholic towards my offspring after their behaviour at Mass tonight. DS1 wants to do his Holy Communion next year but I don't know if he should since he can't sit through one bloody Mass! Wah!
And yes, I know "bloody" isn't very Catholic either :-P
I am in love with my hansom partner. He comes from a family that don't really do "Christmas" and i have turned them onto the season. Cue mil singing Christmas carols when we didn't know she knew any. She has never been excited for a Christmas until this year and i 100% pulled off an awesome day. My partner helped and supported me and even got into the spirit too.
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