I am having a bit of a freak out and need some help. I am 17wks pregnant and I am having to make a decision about where I am going to give birth within the next week. I had a home birth with my first baby and it was amazing. I would love nothing more than to do it again this time. Unfortunately I don't think we can afford it this time. We have no birth center or funded home birth program and this leaves me with the sole option of the local hospital. My local hospital has a very divided reputation so I have no idea what to expect. In addition to that half the women I have talked to who have given birth there have ended up with a C-section and this is quite a large group over the years as I work in daycare and worked closely with many families (plus all my co-workers getting pregnant). The story is always the same, labour stalls in the transfer so they have drugs to speed it up and end up in surgery.
I don't judge the birth choices of others but as someone who's ideal birth is in my home I want to avoid surgery at all costs. Also, my only personal experience with the maternity section of the hospital was when I went in for medical management of my missed miscarriage. I had to insist on medication over d&c, argue about whether I could ingest it as opposed to inserting it then later on argue with a midwife over her getting a pot to catch the placenta for the doctor to test. She didn't believe I knew the difference between small clots equal to af or a whole placenta. I find it hard to trust someone who treats me like I am dumb and cant put any trust in me.
So I guess in addition to venting on my complete lack of options I am needing any tips or advice on how to approach this so that I have the best chance at being interfered with as little as possible. I have massive issues with the idea of strange people being near my private parts so that will be struggle enough, having said strange people touch me unnecessarily may just cause me to lose it and ruin everything. Help?