It's possible. I've read a fair few pancake threads. I've even read one where once the pancake was flipped physical abuse against a woman's husband was condoned.
My point was that I think a lot of the negative replies have been because he is a male. If a woman posted the OP, no one would demand more information, no one would feel sorry for the man in the situation. They'd tell her to leave.
I don't think OP will come back.. I think some people on here are tooting their own horns more than the op was to begin with.
That's fine, you obviously won't ever change, and I wouldn't expect that, but be prepared for people to call you out for being a ***** when you're being one. I'd like to see you express your views to people like this in person
If she wasn't going to look for a job then there's one ready for her there if she wants it.
Two sides to very pancake you say, how do we know that the hours available were only night time. Maybe being family she would be given easier daytime shifts?
It's only controlling if he forced her to take the position, which he didn't.
I think the OP is having a vent more than anything, like we all do in here.
If he came in here proclaiming to know how she felt and gave her side of the pancake then he'd be accused of all sorts too.
He can't win.
I understand his frustration all too well having seen this kind of thing before.
While I won't assume to know what's going on with her I will say that it must have been hard to only have known each other a few months before they got pregnant. The OP said there were some problems to begin with before the pregnancy and he stuck around to try do the right thing.
Many, many other young men wouldn't.
If you were my son @Tommy86, I'd put aside these minor issues and ask you if you loved her and could see yourselves building on a future, possibly with more children?
If yes, then this is a hiccup. There will be many more to come because no long term relationship goes the distance without the ups and downs.
If you love each other it's really worth working them through and growing together.
If you have no love there anymore, then I'd advise you to leave when the time is right. Nothing good will come of staying with some one you don't love.
Obviously you need to do this with respect and as kindly as possible.
If you're leaving because you don't love her anymore then she needs to know that, don't blame it on all the little things she's not doing be used they're temporary.
She's still the mother of your child and you need to keep the relationship amicable, even if that means you cop a lot of hassle for ending the relationship.
Anyway, just my thoughts.
We haven't heard back from you so maybe none of our comments are relevant any more?
best of luck either way
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