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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nomia View Post
    I agree that we don't understand the whole context of the situation, but I would feel incredibly bad throwing something out when it meant someone else went without.

    It's also effectively throwing another persons time and money in the bin.
    Normally I would agree but if someone is silly enough to give kids something unwrapped on Halloween then they've got to expect that ... (Well actually they wouldn't as they probably just don't get it).

  2. #42
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    I didn't think it sounded like the child was being rude. They were being honest and sounds like they were using the social skills of a child to try to decline politely. I remember your other thread about lying and I think we are just trained to lie so much. I honestly believe it's part of the cause of so many mental health issues - not being able to be honest for fear of offending someone. (I know, a bit of a tangent from a child refusing a specific 'treat', but it's the same values etc.)

    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I think as a society we've become greedy and hard to please.
    We've always done lists in our family for birthday's and Christmas. We'd all much rather spend what little money we have on something our loved ones really want, and in turn would rather they spend their hard-earned on something that will be genuinely appreciated.

    The in-laws feel uncomfortable with this idea. The result? 80% of their presents have been re-gifted or op-shopped. What a waste! In a society where waste is such an issue I feel we should be 'fussy' about gifts.

    I'd prefer my child politely refused food. I had one of my year 6 students say "no thanks" to my Christmas gift (same thing for every child in the class). They weren't being rude, it was something they genuinely had no interest in, they had no siblings they could on-gift it to, so I kept it and gave it to someone else down the track. No biggie. I'd much prefer that than seeing it in the bin just because they didn't want to hurt my feelings.

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    I don't think they're being rude intentionally. They probably don't want you to go to any trouble for them. I usually accept water, but don't drink tea/coffee.
    i don't think so either really, I just think my ideas if etiquette are different to theirs so I try to remember that at the end of the day. Come to think of it they're not the types who offer anything when we visit them either. To me it's good etiquette to offer guests a drink (at least) and food/nibbles but I can accept not all believe that... Or can I... Lol.

    eta. Come to think of it, I am very much a community-minded person but I know a lot aren't. I appreciate every little thing in life, particularly kindness. We were also raised to never reject things given out of kindness because the action of giving itself is the real gift. When it comes to kids I would think usually, a child raised by parents with those values would not dare reject a gift - we would have feared for our lives if we did! Lol - unless there's a specific reason on a particular occasion and they are polite.
    Last edited by Ellewood; 01-11-2014 at 13:21.

  4. #44
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    Bahaha saw this pop up on my fb and thought of this thread
    Attachment 62711

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  5. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to SheWarrior For This Useful Post:

    DizzyDaisy  (01-11-2014),GlitterFarts  (01-11-2014),VicPark  (01-11-2014)

  6. #45
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    I think it so funny reading this thread and remembering all the threads where someone mil is trying to take over or out do or even just give stuff that the parents don't want. And everyone tells them not to accept them or speak up and say something.

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    Elijahs Mum  (01-11-2014),peanutmonkey  (01-11-2014),Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (01-11-2014),Stretched  (01-11-2014)

  8. #46
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    Speaking of 'wasting things' when taking unwanted food and other items, imagine all that waste left in Target, Big W, the supermarkets of unsold Halloween stock..... Just sayin'.


    Our Family is now complete.
    Welcome DS The 'Easy One' 28.09.2014.
    Feisty and Independent DD 02.03.2012
    DH 36
    L'il ol Me 31.

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  10. #47
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    I think you can politely say 'no thank you' to anything,
    you dont have to take something / eat or drink something just because someone gives it to you.

  11. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by Renn View Post

    Trick or Treating isn't just about the lollies they get, it's also about having fun with friends/family etc... something different and exciting for kids. Given that, I think it'd be perfectly fine for a kid who hates all lollies to go, just for the experience. The only possible reason for accepting lollies they then don't like is to make the adult feel good. I don't think that's a kid's job.
    .
    Agreed. I have been trying to look at this from another point of view to try and understand how a child politely declining something could be rude, but I just don't get it. He may have said it at every door he knocked on, but was out enjoying the experience with his friends. Who cares. Had he demanded something else, then yes it would be rude.
    I also don't think it's rude to decline some 'broccoli' at a dinner party. I usually just make a few different things, or run the menu by my guests first so I know I'm cooking something they will like. If they tell me they don't like something well so be it, I enjoy the left overs and don't make it for them again next time they come over.

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  13. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by lil miss View Post
    Bahaha saw this pop up on my fb and thought of this thread
    Attachment 62711

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    I think it so funny reading this thread and remembering all the threads where someone mil is trying to take over or out do or even just give stuff that the parents don't want. And everyone tells them not to accept them or speak up and say something.
    Maybe true, but I personally think this kind of rudeness is awful and what's wrong with the world. Not to be too heavy or anything but seriously people can have such nasty attitudes towards others who really haven't done anything evil, these days. If my child said or had the attitude 'thanks bi.tch' to someone who gave him a gift I'd be disgusted. I know it's supposed to be funny but I don't find that kind of humour at all funny!

  14. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ellewood View Post
    Maybe true, but I personally think this kind of rudeness is awful and what's wrong with the world. Not to be too heavy or anything but seriously people can have such nasty attitudes towards others who really haven't done anything evil, these days. If my child said or had the attitude 'thanks bi.tch' to someone who gave him a gift I'd be disgusted. I know it's supposed to be funny but I don't find that kind of humour at all funny!
    You know what for the longest time I let people walk all over me. I accepted every gift I was given even when hurt and did damage to me. I thanked them for it.
    Than one day not so long ago I really thought about it.

    I was thanking people for hurting me.
    Not all gifts are given out of the right motive.



    I have someone in my life that gives gifts as a way of controlling people.

    So you know what I have learnt both how to be polite and FIRM when declining gifts.


    Btw I didn't find meme funny either but that's okay my Humor is just different.


 

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