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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    There's a difference between
    1) turning down a treat and
    2) going door knocking for treats then turning down what's offered.

    I stand by my comments in the original Halloween thread. I will rephrase for this thread though: the kid seemed spoilt, like he had an air of entitlement about him that he could only have learned from parents that pander to him.
    I don't get it. If he wanted to pander to he would have asked for another type of lolly instead of missing out.

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  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    There's a difference between
    1) turning down a treat and
    2) going door knocking for treats then turning down what's offered.

    I stand by my comments in the original Halloween thread. I will rephrase for this thread though: the kid seemed spoilt, like he had an air of entitlement about him that he could only have learned from parents that pander to him.
    It's also possible that child could have extra social needs as in Aspergers etc not been "pandered" to, one of my friends children would have done the same thinking he were being polite because he doesn't like the item offered.

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  5. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elijahs Mum View Post
    I can't remember where I saw it - I'm hoping it was Dr Phil cause VicPark loves him! But it was that we need to let our kids say no sometimes - by forcing them to always say yes and never refuse anything or never say how they really feel is not only bad for their self esteem and self confidence but they need to know how to say no to also protect themselves - adults are not always right and or trustworthy

    A polite no thank you from a child I think is wonderful - I hope DS has the confidence and politeness to do this, I'm not saying in all occasions they should be arrogant little turds but to politely turn down a chocolate so someone else can get it I think is great

    I say no to food quite often as I don't eat red meat or chicken and DS does not like potato of any kind so often says no to hot chips or mashed potato which I think is fine and we just had to have the talk about being thankful for any present he gets as we just had his party and he got a few toys he already had
    You can teach your kids to say no to physical things while still encouraging them to eat their veggies (or freddo's)

  6. #24
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    So Vp.

    I don't like cake and won't eat it. Should I never go to another birthday party again.

  7. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    So Vp.

    I don't like cake and won't eat it. Should I never go to another birthday party again.
    That's different. Dessert isn't a main meal. If you refuse a main meal that's rude (unless medical reasons). Refusing a desert is only rude if:
    1) you demand a substitute Dessert OR
    2) you go door knocking for deserts and then knock back what you're given

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  9. #26
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    What if the person was offering opened sweets? My kids aren't allowed to eat snakes or any lollies that aren't sealed. Should they take them just so they can throw them away later?

    I just find it incredibly wasteful. I do see where you're coming from but (a) it's Halloween so once a year (b) it's a kid and (c) it's not like you didn't have someone else to give them to.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    What if the person was offering opened sweets? My kids aren't allowed to eat snakes or any lollies that aren't sealed. Should they take them just so they can throw them away later?

    I just find it incredibly wasteful. I do see where you're coming from but (a) it's Halloween so once a year (b) it's a kid and (c) it's not like you didn't have someone else to give them to.
    I would tell my kids take it, you aren't allowed to eat anything until you're at home. Then I would go through the loot bag and throw out anything that wasn't sealed/looked sus

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    I see nothing wrong with politely turning down food. If I had trick or treaters come to my door and one politely refused a lolly/chocolate and said to give it to someone else, I would be very impressed with their manners actually. If they said something like "no I dont like freddos, give me something else", well then to me thats rude.

    With gifts etc my kids have been given some awful things but they smile and say thank you. Food is different though. If I dont like something, I will politely say no thank you and I dont see why my kids should be different- we all have our likes and dislikes and im not going to make them eat something they dont like. But our whole family is like that- if we dont like a certain vegetable/food, we politely decline when asked if we want some served on our plate. So to me its normal to politely decline food. The friends we associate with are the same as well- its no big deal.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  12. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I would tell my kids take it, you aren't allowed to eat anything until you're at home. Then I would go through the loot bag and throw out anything that wasn't sealed/looked sus
    I just think this is another example of the terrible example we're setting kids that if you don't want something you just throw it away.

    Kids in school learn a lot about waste. My kids are always lecturing me about wasting stuff and using the last of everything before you throw it away.

    Putting it into that context you may feel differently about things when your kids get older.

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  14. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    I just think this is another example of the terrible example we're setting kids that if you don't want something you just throw it away.

    Kids in school learn a lot about waste. My kids are always lecturing me about wasting stuff and using the last of everything before you throw it away.

    Putting it into that context you may feel differently about things when your kids get older.
    Good point.


 

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