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  1. #11
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    In confused as to why you are trying to change schools. If your current school doesn't have clubs/sports then enrol your children in after school activities. Ask your hubby's opinion on activities before you come up with a decision and he might be more responsive.

    Lawyers seems like an over reaction unless the new school is really highly rated. Even then talking to your ex before decisions are made surely would be preferred. Ie take it back a notch: forget the school thing for now. Open up the conversation with your ex about how to address your sons anxiety. He might have some good ideas that don't involve up-rooting the kids from their school.
    Last edited by VicPark; 30-10-2014 at 13:25.

  2. #12
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    We are moving and its going to cost to much money to get the kids to school everyday and then pick them up. Also as the mother inlaw watches them on the days that I work late and doesnt drive shed have to walk 4 kids to the train station then catch a bus just to get them home.
    After school care is out of the question as well. I dont feel the kids are benefitting from the school they are at now and havent for the last couple of years.
    Also my ex threatened to take it to court not me. He also threatened to take my children away because he doesnt want them to move schools.

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    Last edited by overcrowded; 30-10-2014 at 13:39.

  3. #13
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    Why is after school care out if the question? Can your ex help out with after school care? (Even if t means paying for a family day care spot). Do you need to move so far away? Will the problems your kids Experience really go away with a new school? Will alternatives like tutoring and after school activities such as sport work?

    Sorry it's hard to work out whether your ex is being reasonable or a **** without the details.

  4. #14
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    After school care wont work because neither my partner nor me will be finished work in time to pick them up.
    Were not moving very far 15ks at the most.
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  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by overcrowded View Post
    After school care wont work because neither my partner nor me will be finished work in time to pick them up.
    Were not moving very far 15ks at the most.
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    Can your ex pick them up? What about family day care? Do you need to move that far away?

    Youve only approached your ex about changing schools since you are moving. Your ex probably thinks it's more to do with convenience for you because you are moving rather than your kids aren't doing well at heir current school and the new school will fix this.
    - If this isn't the case it might be beneficial gathering evidence for your ex to prove how the new school will fix your kids problems.

  6. #16
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    No my ex wouldnt pick all the kids up and I wouldnt ask him too as we already have someone who looks after them on the afternoons that we need but she has to catch a train up to pick them up now and then walks them home to our place but when we move she would have to catch a bus and train to pick them up and then a train and bus home.
    We are moving to be closer to family as we dont have family real close by and wed like to be closer to them.
    I dont know if the school will fix any problems my children have but they do have alot more programs in place for the kids that the current school doesnt and id like the kids to have a choice as to what they can do whether that be a music program, inter school sport or just a club of some sort, even if they dont want to do any of it at least they have the option of trying something different. Im not looking for a school to fix problems but if it can be more helpful then the school they are going to then thats a bonus.
    I approached my ex last year about changing schools and we werent moving.

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  7. The Following User Says Thank You to overcrowded For This Useful Post:

    VicPark  (30-10-2014)

  8. #17
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    Just to clarify - is the school change bc the kids aren't doing well or for convenience bc you will have moved? For your family I think they are equally valid, but in your DH's case if it's the latter he may fight it.

  9. #18
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    Its abit of both. But I dont think thats got anything to do with why my ex doesnt want them to change. He likes to control and this is his way of controlling the situation. This isnt a decision weve made lightly and ive been dreading talking to my ex about it after the last refusal but its a decision that we made that we think is in the best interest of all our kids and we changed our minds a couple of times because of my son and how he will react but we think that if we can get past the initial couple weeks then hell settle. Ive also spoken to my son about it and at 1st he was worried coz he wouldnt have any friends and ive told him that I understand that and im worried too but we can only try and see how things go but he works himself up and then once hes done it a couple times hes ok with things. He was the same when in mother inlaw started picking them up but hes fine now with it.
    Also itll only take my ex 15 mins from his house to get to the school ive looked into for the kids. Which is roughly not even 10 minutes more then what it takes them now
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  10. #19
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    If you are sure your ex is being obstructionist purely because he wants to control the situation ... Then find some way to make him feel like he at least has a say/input. Highlight how the move is beneficial for him and he kids. Because bottom line thats what's going to bring him round, not talk of how it is convenient for you and your current DP.

  11. #20
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    I think its abit late for that seeing as hes told me hes speaking to his solicitor and im not changing the kids school. He also told me that hes going for full custody of our 2 kids.

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