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  1. #111
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    Very true VP. A friends 8 year old daughter started saying she needs to lose weight and her thighs are too fat. We found out that one of her "friends" at school was telling her she is too big and needs to lose weight (she isn't too big, but she isn't rake thin either). The little girl who says things like that often says things like "my mother runs 5 kg every day and that is why she is thin and beautiful"....she is 8.


    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Concern in itself doesn't make you a bad role model... Surely you have to agree though that there's a point where it can become problematic? If a mother has a boob job, tummy tuck, nose job, does her hair blonde and is always talking about her physical appearance in front if her daughter (pre-surgery that she's unhappy with it, post surgery that she's happy with it) then that's not healthy for a child. It's continuing the cycle of teaching kids that it's what's on the outside that counts. I've been to a few seminars on eating disorders in teens and one thing that is stressed is from a young age parents shouldn't be focusing on how the body looks in front of their kids. Statements like "look at Jane she lost a lot of weight, she looks sooo awesome" or "my **** looks fat!" all add up in affecting your child's body image. The experts recommend phrasing things in a different way eg "gee jane looks so healthy now, she's more active, that's great."

  2. #112
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    I don't think anyone is saying people should or shouldn't do certain things - more lets talk about why we want to do said things. I shave my pits and my legs and wear make up all the time, I colour my hair and wear jewellery etc. Do I think that the reasons I do these things are because I have been socially condition to think that these are the things women need to do to be attractive? Heck yes! Am I going to stop doing them because I know that I have been socially conditioned to think that way? Heck no.

    I don't think there is any problem in exploring issues and asking questions.

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  4. #113
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    And that's why I love visiting third world countries. People are too busy concentrating on how to make a living and spending time with their family to worry about what they look like. They accept you for who you are. It's so liberating.

    Maybe we should learn from them

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    beebs  (25-10-2014),Explora  (25-10-2014),MsViking  (25-10-2014),sky1  (25-10-2014)

  6. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    I don't think anyone is saying people should or shouldn't do certain things - more lets talk about why we want to do said things. I shave my pits and my legs and wear make up all the time, I colour my hair and wear jewellery etc. Do I think that the reasons I do these things are because I have been socially condition to think that these are the things women need to do to be attractive? Heck yes! Am I going to stop doing them because I know that I have been socially conditioned to think that way? Heck no.

    I don't think there is any problem in exploring issues and asking questions.
    I agree with you and know this isn't something you're saying but, while we're on the topic of shaving and social conditioning, I hate when people say that women only shave for social reasons.
    I shave purely for hygiene and comfort.

  7. #115
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    I live in quite a cold climate, often the women around here go the whole of winter without shaving their legs (me included), it just ins't worth it, you never show your legs it's too cold and it's almost like a warm winter layer (hehe). I'm back to every second day now the weather has warmed up though. Comfort wise, I don't find it comfortable myself, my arm pits always get itchy and little bumps etc (urgh!). But I like the look of it better...but why do I like the look? It's a fascinating subject right!! I love thinking about stuff like this - this is why I'm studying sociology at uni. I just love it!

    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I agree with you and know this isn't something you're saying but, while we're on the topic of shaving and social conditioning, I hate when people say that women only shave for social reasons.
    I shave purely for hygiene and comfort.

  8. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by Theboys&me View Post
    I dunno hey - I want to get a tummy tuck for me. My kids never need to know about it. I want it because I feel gross. Im the first to admit I have a low self esteem.

    But then - I also want to exercise, wear make up, drink wine, read a book, wax my muff, shave my legs, wash my hair, surf BH, wear perfume daily... All for me. It's not to give an impression on youngsters or buck to society's pressures. It's really just because I'm quite selfish and that's what I want.
    Gawd. If wanting to do those things makes one selfish then I'm a self-involved cow! ;-)

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  10. #117
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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I agree with you and know this isn't something you're saying but, while we're on the topic of shaving and social conditioning, I hate when people say that women only shave for social reasons.
    I shave purely for hygiene and comfort.

    PS - I have just started getting a few grey hairs, and it is stressing me out. I just would love to age naturally and just embrace the ageing...but I don't think I can.

  11. #118
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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I agree with you and know this isn't something you're saying but, while we're on the topic of shaving and social conditioning, I hate when people say that women only shave for social reasons.
    I shave purely for hygiene and comfort.
    It's funny... Just the other day I was shaving my legs in the shower and I thought "why the heck am I doing this". I didn't know what to say to myself...

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  13. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It's funny... Just the other day I was shaving my legs in the shower and I thought "why the heck am I doing this". I didn't know what to say to myself...
    I was at a local market recently (in a town known for it's "hippy" folk) and saw plenty of young and middle aged women wearing shorts or knee length dresses with very hairy legs. For someone like myself who loves my monthly all over wax, I found it absolutely fascinating and wished I could be brave enough to do it!

  14. #120
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    Quote Originally Posted by HopefulK View Post
    I was at a local market recently (in a town known for it's "hippy" folk) and saw plenty of young and middle aged women wearing shorts or knee length dresses with very hairy legs. For someone like myself who loves my monthly all over wax, I found it absolutely fascinating and wished I could be brave enough to do it!
    Byron bay?


 

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