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  1. #1
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    Default DH wanting to hire 'attractive' assistant, comfort level?

    Let's say that your DH needed to hire an assistant to work directly under him at his workplace. Out of all the members in his team, the best candidate is, both on paper and for personal chemistry, an older woman. A woman your DH has casually mentioned as being attractive. Upon meeting this woman you find she is not wearing a wedding ring but is in a committed relationship with a younger co-worker (12mths) You are in a happy healthy marriage of 5years and have no real reason to distrust your DH... This woman is warm, bubbly and dresses in a professional manner that flaters her body and natural look....but isn't explicitly flirting with your DH when your around, and he's never mentioned her doing such behavior. With this situation, knowing that he will be spending more waking hours at work, working closely and one on one with an attractive woman, who he is her boss (position of power).....than he does with you (normal with career men in marriages)....what is your comfort level with this situation?
    Last edited by Molly19; 05-10-2014 at 08:04.

  2. #2
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    100% I trust my DH. Do you have trust issues or reasons not to trust him?

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  4. #3
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    I would be fine as I have been in pretty much the same situation. until recently DH's assistant was a very attractive older single woman. It wasn't an issue for me.

    But to be honest I can see how it could be. In my 20 years as a lawyer working in offices I saw many flirtations and romances develop between co-workers.

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    If they are genuinely the best person for the job then I'd have no issue with it. It would be unfair that she'd miss out on the job because she happens to have good genetics.

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    Hmm.
    I trust my DH 100% so I wouldn't have a problem with him working closely with an attractive woman. He works with female clients and architects all the time, some of whom I've met and they're gorgeous women.
    It would be unrealistic of me to think he's blind to this, he's not a stupid man.
    And I'm sure there's a little work place (harmless) flirting from time to time. A little harmless banter helps to pass an otherwise mundane, boring day.
    BUT it would bother me to no end if it was done in front of me, for sure!
    So I would question why she thought that was OK?
    It's very disrespectful to you and I think that's what I would have issue with more than anything.

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    Am I misreading the OP? I thought she said this woman isn't explicitly flirting with her DH.

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    I am lost.
    If she is the best person for the job What The heck does her gender and appearance have to do with it.


    I seriously hope your not trying to stop someone advancing in the job just because they are a woman.

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    If she's the best person for the job, then she should get the job. I'm almost gob smacked that her looks and relationship status should have any impact what so ever on her getting the job.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    Am I misreading the OP? I thought she said this woman isn't explicitly flirting with her DH.
    Ah right!
    I read it wrong, I thought she was flirting outright with him in front of her.

    Well then I don't think there's anything to be worried about at all.
    Worry if there's something to worry about otherwise you'll drive yourself crazy OP.

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    You answered the question very early on. Most suitble applicant, and they work well together.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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