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  1. #181
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    Quote Originally Posted by [Mod] pegasus View Post
    The thing I think of when I see things like this is that at the time, they're probably not conscious of the cameras and what they're doing. Then, the next day when they see the news/paper and realise, then realise that their friends and family have seen it too - how embarassing!
    I agree with this. I didn't see any posts as attacking you, just sharing the insight that time and new experiences bring. Many parents struggle with the adjustment to having children and are taken by surprise at the unexpected ways their life has had to change. This struggle can at times exacerbate existing anxiety issues or PND even, or cause you to question your whole identity. Typically any "wait til you have kids" or "wait til your kids are in school" comments come from a place of caring, of wanting to prepare the other person to change their expectations.

    Edit: wow, some app malfunction there. No idea where that quote came from! It should have quoted Party of Three at the top of the page.

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  3. #182
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    I was called ridiculous and a stepford wife. I think thats a little unsettling after answering a question. I dont want to argue over a difference of opinion. 10 hour drive ahead of us

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  5. #183
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    I grew up in a culture (as did most of my friends) where you take your shoes off inside the house. So I have never questioned having to take my shoes off. I didn't even think about it being strange or unusual.

    My husband on the other hand, grew up in a shoes on culture. But his family don't seem to have shoes on 100% of the time at home...I'm not sure when/why they decide to take their shoes off.

    When we got married and had our own place, he automatically switched to "shoes off".

    Some guests leave their shoes on, some take them off. That's fine. If the floor is grubby, we clean it after they leave. People that know us well and that visit often (and sometimes they are shoes on people), have been known to bring slippers over. I've brought my own socks to friends' houses before - maybe it's a cultural thing, but that's what we grew up doing!

    As for cleaning, we run the robot vacuum cleaner every day when we leave for work, do a full vacuum and mop maybe once a week. Admittedly we don't have a backyard, just a deck, so there is usually not much mud or anything being traipsed through the house.

    Serious question though - if you are a shoes on household...what do you do when you get up in the morning? Straight into a pair of shoes?

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  7. #184
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    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    Im sorry you're feeling like you cant hve an opinion but if you're allowed to make a comment tht basicallt says if you have time to bub hub you have time to clean (and you even commented that it may make you unpopular) then all myself and others were doing was saying why it isnt that simple? I'm unsure why you're feeling attacked as I dont see any unkind posts, just people saying their own situation etc? But regardless I am sorry that you're feeling that way as it isn't a nice way to feel and it certainly wasn't my intention.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    I didn't feel that way after your post @peanutmonkey. You were constructive and made complete sense

    I felt attacked because I certainly did not insinuate anyone had germ ridden houses. I think my comment was taken out of context according to others situations-thats why I was careful to say this is my situation and my beliefs. I know I said I wanted to leave it there but I didnt want you to feel you made me feel that way! I know that when I have kids things will change, but as for this thread, that wasnt the question and im answering from a different place.

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  9. #185
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    @sycx I put slippers on if it's cold when I get up. Otherwise as I have to do the school run 5 days a week they go on then and generally don't come off again til the end of the day.

    We live close to the beach so in summer they're on and off a lot depending on how much sand is in my day.

    I'm not a "shoes on" house. I'm a "whatever suits you" house.

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  11. #186
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    Quote Originally Posted by sycx View Post

    Serious question though - if you are a shoes on household...what do you do when you get up in the morning? Straight into a pair of shoes?
    Most households don't have a 'shoes on all the time' or 'shoes off all the time rule'; it's only the shoes-off people that are fanatical like that
    Most households that I know of are a 'shoes on or off whenever you feel like it' type.

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  13. #187
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    @brooketobub I think you're taking what I said last night too personally. There were more posters on your side than not. Sometimes it can be as simple as the overwhelming feeling you get from a series of posts rather than individual ones. I was also coming down with gastro last night so was being brief.

    But you are right you can't compare our situations. I have 4 kids, am very social and work and have pets. My situation is quite different to yours.

    Broad opinions are always welcome. It's just honestly not something I've ever though about in my entire adult life but I will certainly be more mindful of it when visiting friends

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  15. #188
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttoneska View Post
    Don't know your situation abd hope I'm not being insensitive if you are ttc ( I was around here two yrs after our ms before before the kids)

    Anyway pre and post kids is totally different. The things you do change so much you wonder of you are the same person.

    I'm a chef and was running a good business from home. I was OCD about a clean kitchen oven fridge etc. I have a 23month old and a 11month old. Yesterday I rearranged mine and hubbies schedules just to get 20min to clean the fridge out.
    I agree with this... My cleanliness has dropped a little since I had kids but I still like a clean house and to me hints like no shoes makes that easier.

    I agree with Brooke to, if you have 5 minutes to play on BH you have 5 minutes to at least get started in cleaning your floors (and this comment is for myself just as much as anyone else... I need the mental break sometimes so I just have to accept it something around the house takes longer to get done.

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  17. #189
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    Quote Originally Posted by sycx View Post
    Serious question though - if you are a shoes on household...what do you do when you get up in the morning? Straight into a pair of shoes?
    You put shoes on when you want and take them off when you want.

    Clean when the floor dirty.

    Its not a big deal. No one ever needs to feel uncomfortable.


    My shoes live in my car. I only wear shoes when I absolutely have too. My hubby likes shoes on so once he put them on he does take them off until late.

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  19. #190
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    Quote Originally Posted by brooketobub View Post
    I was called ridiculous and a stepford wife. I think thats a little unsettling after answering a question. I dont want to argue over a difference of opinion. 10 hour drive ahead of us
    I'm sorry you felt this way. I'm sure it was not intended.
    I think where people got their hackles up was the bub hub/cleaning comment.

    Sometimes people posting on bub hub is the one half hour session of "me" time they get all day. The rest of the time is spent tidying up after children, moderating fights, having a child watch you on the toilet etc.

    I know this is not what you meant, but people have construed it this way.


    For pp, we are a shoes on/off house, as such. I've never asked anyone to take their shoes off, and have no desire for them to do so.
    If they are close friends or family, yep, take shoes off if you like.
    If people are coming over, I put shoes on.
    When I get up, I am generally barefoot, unless it's freezing, then I put on my uggies.
    I often go about barefoot inside, but that is nothing to do with cleanliness issues. It is comfort only.

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