I feel really silly posting in this thread but 8 days after my DS was born and I can't stop crying.
It's not just random crying, it's this huge sadness hanging over me that I can't shift.
Not all day every day but a number of times a day I start crying uncontrollably.
I was sooky on Saturday (4 days after DS was born) but it stopped on Sunday but now it's back.
I have irrational fears of something happening to DP if he leaves the house, or drives any great distance. I'm petrified something will happen to him and it breaks me because I would be left to do this alone.
I don't feel an overwhelming love or enjoyment for DS. I care for him but it's not how I imagined.
I begged DP not to leave me alone with DS yesterday because I was afraid I wouldn't look after him properly.
I'm really lucky, DP is amazing. He probably takes care of DS 50% of the time when he's home. If not more.
DP asked me questions from a beyond blue brochure last night and I scored 17. Apparently anything over 10 shows signs of depression. But I'm trying to be rational. I answered those questions about a point in time - right now - it's not like I've always felt like this.
I still haven't bathed my own baby or taken him In the car.
I had anxiety during pregnancy that something would go wrong. It didn't of course but my anxiety was high and from when I found out I was pregnant in January until DS was born 8 days ago I hadn't slept for more than 2 hours at a time without waking up. I had restless leg which also kept me awake.
I'm sorry for the ramble but I'm not sure if these feelings are just the blues or something more or just sleep deprivation.
Any advice would be good...