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  1. #1
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    Default How can I make the evenings better?

    Im coping pretty well with ds during the day now, but im still struggling big time during the evenings.

    Ds has a feed sometime around 5 or 6 (demand feeding so whenever but its usually sometime around then) & then he will not go to sleep. He just starts screaming & can continue on & off for hours most evenings.

    He will not settle for me so dh has to spend hours settling him. But if he's home late this can be a big problem cause both ds & I are so distressed by the time he gets home.

    I immediately get really anxious when ds starts screaming cause when he gets really upset he usually chokes on his own saliva & goes limp & floppy for a few seconds (I dont think he stops breathing) & it terrifies me, especially when im here by myself, so I feel like I never want him to cry.

    What can I do to make the evenings better?

    Dh usually gets a call from me basically in tears asking when he'll be home & if he says he's going to be late I usually end up cracking it at him. I know thats not fair but its just so hard

    Sent from my SM-T210 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  2. #2
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    Do you have a bath? If so can you hop in with him?

  3. #3
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    Could you maybe take him for a walk in the pram/carrier?

  4. #4
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    Have you got a carrier yet? That saved me with DD.

  5. #5
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    He hates the baby bjorn.

    I have tried to put him in the pram but he cracks up even more if I put him down

    Sent from my SM-T210 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Could you try a different carrier, maybe a sling style?

    How about one of those vibrating bassinet seats?

    this and the carrier were my saviours.

  7. #7
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    Try an ergo or a hug a bub wrap. They are way more comfy for mum and bub.

    My suggestions include long walks in an inclined pram vs flat back, carrier, baths and massage time.

    wifey of hubby who is always away. mother of two girls who are always amusing.

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    I'm not sure how old your bub is but I'm guessing a few months from your ticker, do you have a bedtime 'routine' at all? I've always demand fed but developed a nighttime routine from early days which really helped. I would bath bub around 4.30ish, breastfeed, burp, more breastfeed, wrap (I'm a big believer in swaddling for sleep) and put baby to bed. If for any reason they didn't go off easily I'd either feed them to sleep (swaddle & BF and then when they were solidly asleep I'd put them down) or put them swaddled in the bouncer and bounce them off to sleep. My kids weren't fans of going off to sleep in the carrier or pram but bouncer was magic for all three of them! Good luck!

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    Things I would (and did) try
    Different carrier
    Shower while holding bub
    Inclined pram ride/even just rocking the pram
    Vibrating seat/swing
    Putting bub in pram or seat and let him watch you cook

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    That time of evening was always a really tough time, you have my empathy!

    For my first, holding her upright and walking and bouncing up and down while shooshing was the only thing that calmed her down - I swear I did it for hours on end! Also bouncing her quite firmly in her bouncer helped a bit. I only had a Baby Bjorn with her and she hated it.

    With my second, I had a Moby Wrap and it saved my sanity during the evenings and left me free to toddler wrangle as well.

    I still have my Moby and if you like, I'd be happy for you to borrow it. I know the wraps look tricky but with a bit of persistence and practice it becomes second nature.


 

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