I'm at breaking point with my 5 yr old and his behaviour and need some help. Sorry for such a long post and if it's a bit jumbled, so is my mind after a bad morning. I'm just trying to get as much information out to paint a clearer picture.
Ds1 has always been a full on kid but lately it's getting worse, to the point we are being talked to by his school teacher that he is making very poor choices at school which has never happened before. Everything is a battle and he doesn't care about consequences, having things taken off him or sitting in time out. We have done 123 magic. That worked wonders to start with when he was 3, now it doesn't as its like he gets 3 chances to keep doing what he's doing and consequences don't phase him.
He has endless energy, always had comments from daycare and now school(he's in kindy) about his energy level. We are constantly at the park, going for walks, exploring or he's playing in the backyard. He is impulsive, stubborn, everything has to be his way, and he is smart. Another thing school has commented on a few times is that he is very switched on and just gets things easily. Eg he can retell a story after being read it once, when the kids were learning patterns at school he got it straight away while most other kids were struggling etc.
I'm at a loss with what to do and feel like I'm failing him. He just won't listen.
I ask him why he is making weak choices and not thinking (these are things they say at school) and he says his brain doesn't know how to be good. Is this weird?
I really make a point of praising him when he is doing the right thing, telling him how happy it makes me. When he is in a good happy mood he is so loving, caring and loves helping. I encourage these moments and praise him for the choices he makes. These moments are brief though.
His diet is good, I cut out majority of additives and preservatives a while ago, he eats lots of fruit and veg and limited sugar. He is a good sleeper, a very early riser but we put him to bed earlier because of this. He goes to sleep easily around 6:30pm and sleeps solid until around 4-5am. The second his eyes open he is full of beans again.
He is always doing the opposite of what he is told, yelling inside, saying silly words, the newest one is poo and wee constantly (fair enough if he needs to go to the toilet and do one he can say it, but not just dancing around the house saying 'yukky yukky yukky poo poo poo' or randomly saying 'poo poo' to strangers!) getting his little brother to copy him saying those things or being naughty, turning the outside tap on (this he does daily and gets in trouble for daily) running away from me at the shops etc. If he does something he knows he isn't allowed to, he goes straight to time out, otherwise he gets one warning and asked to stop, then time out. But that still doesn't stop the behaviour. If anything he is worse while sitting in timeout. Continues to say silly words, yells, calls out to his brother to get him to go in that room etc. If he is in time out and continues to do the wrong thing I start the time again, take something away from him that I know he likes, or say we aren't going to whatever place he wanted to go to that week. None of this is effective though, he just keeps going. Sometimes he can sit in time out for half an hour because I have to keep starting the time over and over.
I explain why it's wrong to do certain things, explain that if he sits in time out quietly he can keep all his things or just sit there for a few minutes then it's over instead of sitting there for ages. He seems to understand but fairly soon is back to doing something else he isn't ment to be doing.
Again so sorry for the long post and thank you so much if you have read this far. Any help or suggestions would be much appreciated. I don't know what else to do.