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  1. #1
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    Thumbs down Newly single parent to be

    Hi all,

    So my DP and I recently just broke up. I'm 25 weeks pregnant now and that was about three weeks ago. We're young parents and now I feel like he doesn't want anything to do with the bub. Being young we talked about terminations (which neither of us wanted to do) but I told him that even if we don't stay together he has to be here for our bub.

    It was a mutual agreement to not be together anymore but now he's told me he doesn't want to go to the parenting classes with me that my midwife set up. He no longer wants to attend midwife appts or any baby things.

    I kind of feel like he's gotten his life back and can just be with his friends and have no responsibilities while I'm carrying our baby. We didn't live together so he only saw me once or twice a week when he felt like it and I'm just scared of our baby not knowing who their daddy is. I know I'm probably overreacting as young parents often don't stay together especially when the babies aren't planned but has anyone had any partners who've done this?

  2. #2
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    Good luck. I have done it on my own since day one . It's hard but you do get the through it.

  3. #3
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    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    First of all, congratulations on your pregnancy! There are many of us on the hub who have done/are doing it alone. It's tough but rewarding. Ok sorry to head about this situation. Emotional stress during pregnancy is difficult to endure.

    My best advice would be - the best thing you can do is assume the FOB will continue not to be involved in his child's life. That way you can lower your expectations and suffer less in the long run. Whether he wants to be involved or not, this man still has a financial obligation to his child. If you haven't already done so, I would recommend calling Centrelink and child support to see what your options are.

    Do you have support people in your life who can be there for the birth? If not, there are other options and you probably have enough time to plan for this.

    The flip side of this situation is - you are completely boss! Want to choose the name of your dreams? Go for it! It's your choice how to feed your baby, how to settle your baby, how to raise your baby, how to decorate the nursery! It may seem like small comfort now, but trust me, it's something you'll grow to appreciate.

    I hope you're doing ok :-)

  4. #4
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    thank you so much ladies.
    I've already been assuming he's not going to be around. My mum had me at 17 which is the age I am now. I'm very fortunate to have both my mum and stepdad's support emotionally and financially. My mum will be with me throughout the birthing process :P hopefully haha. gosh sounds painful.
    I guess it'll be easier since I do want to have a routine for my child when their 6 months old and I'll be sharing my room with my bub so i can choose how I want to do things.
    Luckily I'm 6 months pregnant so i still have a lot of time to decide and plan how I'd like to have my baby and all of those options. thank you so much for the suggestions. It really does help a heap xx


 

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