+ Reply to Thread
Page 5 of 5 FirstFirst ... 345
Results 41 to 46 of 46
  1. #41
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,669
    Thanks
    1,004
    Thanked
    2,412
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Renn View Post
    See, to me it's not just about self sufficiency - it's about building and understanding of and respect for others, as well as a sense of responsibility.

    We didn't have chores as teenagers (except, theoretically, keeping our rooms clean) as our mum wanted us to focus on school. I SO took for granted what she did. She would get frustrated that I didn't appreciate everything she did around the house. I DIDN'T appreciate it, because I genuinely had no idea what was involved. I didn't fully appreciate what she did for us until I moved out. Whilst all kids are different, I think that expecting children to contribute to the household gives them a better understanding of and appreciation for what others are doing. It's so common that women on here complain about their partners never 'helping' around the house. I do wonder whether that would be more common where someone moves from having their parents do everything for them, to having a partner do it all... never fully understanding what's involved.

    As well as that, I think a sense of responsibility to others is important. Firstly, for a sense of importance and self-esteem that others are relying on you... but also because, at most times in your life, other people WILL be relying on you to some extent. If you've never had to live up to other peoples' expectations, that can be a daunting thing to deal with. (Obviously that's possible through other means, just one reason that I think kids doing chores is beneficial).
    I have addressed other points when I replied to MissKitty so I won't repeat myself but I'm okay with my kids not really fully understanding and appreciating what I do for them until they grow up and move out (depending on how old they are when they move out...if they feel like hanging out at home until their mid 20's then there's no way in h3ll they won't be pulling their weight equally). It took until I had kids to fully understand what my parents did for me, I appreciate my parents more than ever now.
    I also have the flip side of where I'm studying and looking after a house hold and raising a family and it's tiring and taxing, but I am doing it by choice, my teenage children wouldn't be.
    My kids contribute to the running of the household (as does my DH), I just don't like the idea of having a teenager who is at school and very possibly working part time to be responsible for mowing lawns/cooking x amount of meals a week, cleaning bathrooms etc. on a regular basis.
    I guess my parents did it well...when I was on school holidays and my parents were both working full time I'd surprise them by cleaning the whole house (minus my sister's room) for them when they were at work etc. I wasn't ungrateful...I didn't fully understand the full impact of everything my parents did for us until I became a parent myself, but I wasn't horrible and selfish.

    I think it's very reasonable for the OP to expect one chore in the afternoon to be completed by the teenager...for me it would be more cleaning up after dinner, rather than cleaning bathrooms. I find some of the list of chores that pp have mentioned they had to do at the same age quite extensive.
    Last edited by Full House; 26-08-2014 at 13:49.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Full House For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (26-08-2014)

  3. #42
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    17,747
    Thanks
    5,085
    Thanked
    8,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Awards:
    Past Moderator - Thank you
    100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    I moved out of home 6 weeks after my 18th birthday so never got there either (my sister did)...but I knew how to run a household. I was self sufficient and knew how to do everything, I just didn't have to do it on a regular basis. I don't believe in doing everything for your kids so much that they have no idea how to do anything. My kids are 8 1/2, 7, and 4 1/2 and they all know how to make a salad and do other dinner prep, vacuum and mop, make their own lunch and breakfast, the older two can pack their lunch for school, fold and put away clothes, look after our pets, make their own beds (that's a daily job for them), and they are all capable of unloading the dishwasher (only the responsibility of the oldest...and the older two can load the dishwasher properly), clean up after themselves etc. etc. I'm not worried about them not knowing how to look after themselves when they move out of home, they will be well prepared
    Your kids are similar ages to mine and it sounds like our expectations are very similar in terms of what they can do :-)

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to misskittyfantastico For This Useful Post:

    Full House  (26-08-2014)

  5. #43
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    21,645
    Thanks
    15,089
    Thanked
    11,254
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 5/2/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 31/10/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 24/10/14Busiest Member of the Week
    For me it about so many things.

    1) having the skill. (When dd moved out so many of her friends didn't know how to do simple things)

    2) learning time management. How work study and run a house.

    3) learning that as family we pull together in good times and bad.

    4) the value of housework. So if some does something for you. You know what it actually involves and a truly grateful for it.

    5) being part of team. That if everyone does their bit no matter how big or small things run smoothly. If even one person not doing the part no matter how small affects the whole.

    6) showing love and respect by going beyond the norm every now and than. Others showing love and respect of you by helping you out when you need it.

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to LoveLivesHere For This Useful Post:

    misskittyfantastico  (26-08-2014),Pusheen The Cat  (26-08-2014)

  7. #44
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    17,747
    Thanks
    5,085
    Thanked
    8,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Awards:
    Past Moderator - Thank you
    100 Posts in a week
    I should also add, I wasn't made to do the chores that I did. My mum was very unwell when I was in my mid teens to mid twenties (when she had a transplant) and she still worked full time, so I wanted to help :-)

  8. #45
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Bayside Brisbane
    Posts
    7,022
    Thanks
    1,229
    Thanked
    1,952
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I haven't read all the responses and I won't have teenagers for a good 8 or so years yet
    But I don't really like the idea of giving my children "chores".
    My kids responsibilities will be to do their school work and keep their own rooms reasonably tidy. If they have their own pets at that age, they'll be responsible for their care.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to CazHazKidz For This Useful Post:

    PomPoms  (26-08-2014)

  10. #46
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    2,669
    Thanks
    1,004
    Thanked
    2,412
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by misskittyfantastico View Post
    I should also add, I wasn't made to do the chores that I did. My mum was very unwell when I was in my mid teens to mid twenties (when she had a transplant) and she still worked full time, so I wanted to help :-)
    That's a different scenario altogether too.
    On a side note...my DH grew up with a live in maid but he moved overseas by himself just before his 17th birthday and knew how to run his own household and work hard. By 18 he was running a business, studying full time and living by himself. Even with a live in maid who did everything for them he has been taught how to be self sufficient and the ethics of hard work.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Teen Mom 3
    By Mod-Degrassi in forum Movies / Music / Books / TV Chat
    Replies: 256
    Last Post: 08-04-2015, 10:06
  2. Teen Pregnancy
    By Stokesii in forum Young Parents
    Replies: 46
    Last Post: 07-11-2013, 13:32
  3. Teen Mum.
    By RoseIrene in forum Introductions
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 30-08-2013, 22:22

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Tambo Teddies
Visit our online store and select your individually handmade natural sheepskin teddy bear. Our soft and loveable bears come in a range of styles and colours. Created in Outback Queensland each bear is unique individual. 100% Australian made!
sales & new stuffsee all
Pea Pods
Buy 2 Award Winning Pea Pods Reusable One Size Nappies for only $38 (in your choice of colours) and receive a FREE roll of Bamboo Liners. Don't miss out, we don't usually have discounts on the nappies, so grab this special offer!
Special Offer! Save $12
featured supporter
Innovations Sports Physiotherapy
Women’s Health Physios who are able to assess and treat a wide range of Pregnancy and Post Natal Issues. We offer Post Natal Pilates Classes taken by our Physios. These classes help you rebuild strength through your Core and Pelvic Floor.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!