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  1. #31
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    More than reasonable! As a teen I had to make my bed, clean room, empty clothes basket and put away my own clothes. Then I had additional house chores vaccumming the upstairs living area, bathrooms, hallway and my room/cleaning bathroom and toilet and dusting living room. Then alternate wash or dry dinner dishes each night.

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  2. #32
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    I don't think that's unreasonable at all. We had chores as teenagers, I didn't like doing them, but it taught me that in real life you have to do jobs you don't particularly want to do.

    Our chores weren't huge. Set the table, help cook sometimes (very grateful for this now because I learned to cook really well), tidy our rooms, put clothes away, help with weeding or washing the car etc. I don't think it interrupted our homework time or cut into our free time too much. Looking back, I think my parents should have even expected a little bit more from me in all honesty. I had it pretty easy.

  3. #33
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    I don't think it's unreasonable at all! At 15, I was working on Saturday mornings and Thursday nights plus I contributed to the household chores - I was responsible for my room, bathroom and toilet, I sorted/hung/brought in/ put away washing, did ironing, cooked meals, did dishes, vacuumed - not all day everyday but I definitely did my share - that's what being part of a family is to me. At exam times though, as a PP mentioned, I wasn't expected to do anything but study.

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  5. #34
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    When my son ( now 19) was at home , he and his sister alternated between setting table and clearing table, packing and unpacking dishwasher after dinner, keeping their rooms clean and dirty clothes had to go in their baskets or i wouldnt wash them... even one sock on the floor didnt get washed if it wasnt in the basket... My daughter is 16, soon 17 and about to start Year 12 in a few weeks.. she works 2 nights a week after school usually 4.5 hours per shift plus both mornings on the weekend PLUS she has school work to do.... I get her to set the table each night when she is home and depending on her homework , she will empty the dishwasher... same rules apply with washing, its only done if its in the basket ... Maybe I should get her to do more chores around the house ,but personally She needs to concentrate on Year 11/12 and education is more important than vacumming the floor... She has a lifetime ahead of her to do these chores, but only one chance at school and being 16/17

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  7. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by tadpoles View Post
    In our family we weren't given chores as kids. We took turns setting the table but didn't call it a chore..

    When I was 14 I started unpacking the dishwasher and my Dad paid me $5 a month. At 15 my Mum and my 3 siblings moved out so I helped Dad out with what I could. I didn't do washing until I was 18 but I did hang it out, bring it in and fold it before that age.

    I think you are going to have trouble getting her to start doing chores if she has never been the type to help out. Perhaps start with her doing her own washing. If she runs out of clothes she'll definitely want to start.

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    Agree with the above. If she hasn't had to do much in the way of helping out and pitching in with household work before it is going to be a rough road to get her to the point of helping without being nagged and not spending all her free time on her self. By the sounds of things she isn't perhaps being very considerate of the rest of the family by spending all her time out with friends after school but perhaps expecting her clothes to be washed and dinner cooked in her absence?

    I'm assuming here based on a few comments strung together- apologies if I'm way off.

    I would try explaining that particularly now that she is older she needs to learn how to do these things for herself as well as help out with the rest of the family- cause that's what families do

    Starting with her washing might be a great place to begin. Especially since there is natural consequences in that she won't have any clothes to wear if it's not done.

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  9. #36
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    I think there's a difference between teaching a teenager to be self sufficient, and having them help run a household. My parents always said we had the rest of our life to do household chores, so to enjoy the freedom of our teenage years while we could.
    Once they've finished highschool then they can help out more...things like being responsible for cooking one night a week and cleaning a bathroom/doing some washing etc. I can't imagine making my 15 year old do their own washing...it's not hard to wash clothes for one extra person.

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  11. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    Once they've finished highschool then they can help out more...things like being responsible for cooking one night a week and cleaning a bathroom/doing some washing etc.
    I left home as soon as I finished high school in order to go to Uni five hours away so I had to be completely self sufficient - run my house and study when I was 17/18. So I'm glad I'd had the preparation and practice while I was 15/16 and home with my parents.

    I agree there must be balance though - I definitely enjoyed my teen years, I wasn't chained to the kitchen sink or anything but I pulled my weight.

  12. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskittyfantastico View Post
    I left home as soon as I finished high school in order to go to Uni five hours away so I had to be completely self sufficient - run my house and study when I was 17/18. So I'm glad I'd had the preparation and practice while I was 15/16 and home with my parents.

    I agree there must be balance though - I definitely enjoyed my teen years, I wasn't chained to the kitchen sink or anything but I pulled my weight.
    I moved out of home 6 weeks after my 18th birthday so never got there either (my sister did)...but I knew how to run a household. I was self sufficient and knew how to do everything, I just didn't have to do it on a regular basis. I don't believe in doing everything for your kids so much that they have no idea how to do anything. My kids are 8 1/2, 7, and 4 1/2 and they all know how to make a salad and do other dinner prep, vacuum and mop, make their own lunch and breakfast, the older two can pack their lunch for school, fold and put away clothes, look after our pets, make their own beds (that's a daily job for them), and they are all capable of unloading the dishwasher (only the responsibility of the oldest...and the older two can load the dishwasher properly), clean up after themselves etc. etc. I'm not worried about them not knowing how to look after themselves when they move out of home, they will be well prepared

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  14. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    I think there's a difference between teaching a teenager to be self sufficient, and having them help run a household. My parents always said we had the rest of our life to do household chores, so to enjoy the freedom of our teenage years while we could.
    See, to me it's not just about self sufficiency - it's about building and understanding of and respect for others, as well as a sense of responsibility.

    We didn't have chores as teenagers (except, theoretically, keeping our rooms clean) as our mum wanted us to focus on school. I SO took for granted what she did. She would get frustrated that I didn't appreciate everything she did around the house. I DIDN'T appreciate it, because I genuinely had no idea what was involved. I didn't fully appreciate what she did for us until I moved out. Whilst all kids are different, I think that expecting children to contribute to the household gives them a better understanding of and appreciation for what others are doing. It's so common that women on here complain about their partners never 'helping' around the house. I do wonder whether that would be more common where someone moves from having their parents do everything for them, to having a partner do it all... never fully understanding what's involved.

    As well as that, I think a sense of responsibility to others is important. Firstly, for a sense of importance and self-esteem that others are relying on you... but also because, at most times in your life, other people WILL be relying on you to some extent. If you've never had to live up to other peoples' expectations, that can be a daunting thing to deal with. (Obviously that's possible through other means, just one reason that I think kids doing chores is beneficial).

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  16. #40
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    No not at all I would be insisting on it. It's common courtesy and respect which I think a lot of people are missing these days. Way to many self entitled people around.


 

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