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  1. #51
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    The reason we opted to have the nuchal scan is for the reason that if there was something wrong with our child we would terminate. For us it wouldn't be fair to bring a child into the world if he/she couldn't have quality of life, the impact financially and the impact it would have on our other child/children. We were faced with this when ds2 was high risk of downs, Edwards and patau. While waiting for the final result we had made the decision to terminate if he had either of the 3. It was the worst few weeks of our lives but fortunately he got the all clear.

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  3. #52
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    I see a lot of comments about children who have disabilities and it not being fair for them. .. Or that they have no quality of life. .. Or can't contribute to society positively. And that this is a reason to terminate.

    It saddens me that people may look at my daughter. .. Or my friend's children and think such negative thoughts about their lives.

    This is truly what saddens me about the blanket view of disabilities. Such a broad range of issues and a narrow point of view.

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  5. #53
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    I think the problem is you have no idea of the level of disability when they are in utero. You have to make assumptions, and often people assume the worst case scenario.

    For those who have been down this path, no matter what you chose, my hat goes off to you.

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  7. #54
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    No, never. My children are my children and they deserve a home with unconditional love, no matter what.

  8. #55
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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    I think it's impossible to state what one would do unless faced with the situation, and everyone's situations are different.

    I must say that I really abhor the term 'abandon' that seems to be getting thrown around a lot, particular in relation to terminations.

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  10. #56
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    Wow. What a deep thread to stumble into!!! My heart goes out to those who have had to battle through a 'decision', those who have a child with a disability and the parents with a disability. It is all very tough stuff.... Makes me grateful for the 'relatively' easier time we have had.

    DH and I had a few conversations about what 'we' would do, in the time approaching our NT scan with DD. DH at this time was in favour of considering a termination if something came up.... He soon realised that he would have had a fairly tough battle with me. DD's results came back something around 1/673.... Made no difference to me what the results were or could have been. My stance was that if there was something wrong that I would rather have the information and resources ready at the birth rather than use the results as a reason to terminate.

    DS's NT results were something like 1/6900. Also, no difference to me. I have found it interesting though that now DH has discovered what it is to be a dad, he now has been mentioning how he couldn't terminate or put a child up for adoption. Kind of 'cute' that he actually thought he would have been able to somehow influence me in the first place but quietly proud that he has evolved in his willingness to tackle the obvious challenges should it come our way (I still want a 3rd child).


 

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