+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 17 of 17
  1. #11
    SuperGranny's Avatar
    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    sunshine coast qld
    Posts
    6,275
    Thanks
    4,715
    Thanked
    2,880
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    hi dngfly, It sounds like you have unresolved issues with her father. ? You could be holding anger and pain from that relationship and without even knowing it you transfer the feelings to your daughter. If she has a different attitude when she is away from home and away from you, I would think counselling for you alone and for both of you perhaps later. I don't think there is any mental illness, but there seems to be hostility that can be removed . marie

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    1
    Reviews
    0
    Hello and I do really appreciate all advice!
    Since she has been at her new school she's won Merritt awards for her behaviour 😁 I am very proud of her for doing so well at school!!! But the moment she's in the car her behaviour changes. Today for instance, we got in the car and needed to pick up her sister over the other side of town, driving past just about every take away place along the way! She said she was hungry and I told her she'd be able to have something when we get home, then she started kicking my chair, whilst I was driving and squealing!!! I asked her to stop, nicely! By this time she begun to wriggle out of her seatbelt still kicking! I collected her sister (17 yo) and we got going home again. Again we drove past mcdonalds and hungry jacks... She started screaming demanding take away and I again told her no, she can eat when we get home! She refused to get out of the car when we got home then when she did she said she's ONLY going to eat the school food! (She knows she's not allowed!). Anyway... I didn't react negatively! She threw herself around a bit, buckling her own legs underneath herself as she slid along the walls until she saw her brother making fruit loops! She then made herself a bowl calmly and are it and has been fine ever since!

    I'm flabbergasted!

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    216
    Thanks
    226
    Thanked
    130
    Reviews
    0
    I have a little experience with behavior stuff. And after reading your description of this afternoons car trip my first thought was ... "And once she calmed herself down and began organising a snack, did you praise her?" Point being, Always look out for those behaviours that you want more of and make a big deal of them. And be specific with your praise. "Great work with making yourself a snack. High five!" is better than stunned silence or "good girl". Also don't turn it into, "see that wasn't hard why can't you behave all the time"...that turns it into another negative.. I think you would benefit from the triple p program? Research and see if anyone in your area is running a group. It sounds like you would benefit from this and so would your daughter.. As PP have advised see your GP or social worker at community health or something. On the right track and awesome that you didn't respond negatively to her demands and you were also consistent with the instruction of eat at home!

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to vue For This Useful Post:

    NurseAnni  (14-01-2015)

  5. #14
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7,877
    Thanks
    3,397
    Thanked
    5,160
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Just as PP has suggested I would take this as an opportunity for some praise - "I'm super impressed at how you calmed down then and got yourself some food - you should be proud of yourself - can we read a story together?"

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to babyla For This Useful Post:

    ~Marigold~  (11-08-2014)

  7. #15
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    976
    Thanks
    262
    Thanked
    298
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Try praise for breathing. By that I mean praising for ANY positives you can find. it works. For example. Thank you for sitting down, thank you for reading your book, I like the way you brushed your hair, good job for reading with our brother, well done for holding my hand etc. try to ignore the negative behaviour and focus on the positives.
    Good luck!

  8. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    4,278
    Thanks
    3,136
    Thanked
    3,462
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Maybe fake it till you make it? Go through the motions of being a loving mother and maybe the feelings will come? If she's crying in her bed can you just go hop into bed and cuddle her to sleep? Even if she's asleep now go into her room and give her a cuddle.

    YOU make the relationship not her. My mum had a bad relationship with her mother, yet my mum and I are really close. Every time she gets upset about the relationship she had with her mum I point out her mum made it that way, but she built it this way with me.

    Maybe take snacks in the car to avoid low blood sugar tantrums? Could she be diabetic?

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to Wise Enough For This Useful Post:

    lilypily  (12-08-2014)

  10. #17
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    1,206
    Thanks
    406
    Thanked
    323
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    How are things going now OP??


 

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 51
    Last Post: 19-01-2014, 11:29
  2. Could I name my daughter...
    By BlackDiamond in forum Choosing Baby Names
    Replies: 36
    Last Post: 30-10-2013, 09:15
  3. My Daughter
    By EchoSummers in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 24-08-2013, 17:08

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
sales & new stuffsee all
Hire For Baby Perth
New RETAIL store - Perth Hire For Baby Perth
Here at Hire for Baby, we offer a wide range of products from Child Restraints to Strollers, Stroller Accessories and Oricom Baby Monitors. Wholesale prices - till the stock ends. Buy from us and get the installation for FREE.
Like us on Facebook and get $10 OFF
featured supporter
Carmels Beauty Secrets
An online beauty and wellness site which offers simple and effective time saving methods and tips which help you look younger for longer.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!