I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety a few years a go.

My problem now is. I am physically ill with worry and having mild panic attacks about my partner cheating on me this weekend. He is going on a bacholres (bucks) party and he will be on a party bus and leaving at 11am. He wont be home till the next day. I know him. He gets very horny when he gets drunk. He has never given me a reason not to trust him. But I have been hurt so many times. For the past few nights I have had some very vivid dreams about him with other women. After having my baby. I feel horrible about my body. Not attractive at all. Please give me some advice?? I dont have money for my meds