I just need to get this all out, as I am honestly not coping.
2014 is absolutely sh!t. In less than 5 months I've had my mum die suddenly of a heart attack at the young age of 44, then I was replaced at work whilst still grieving and subsequently lost someone I thought was a close friend because of it, had a suspected miscarriage (which is just a huge slap in the face since I've struggled with infertility for so long), then DP's nan who raised him passed away of ovarian cancer, DS's additional needs have become more evident and he's likely to be placed in a support class as of next year, and on top of it all we're being evicted from our home.
It's just way too much in such a short time frame. How am I meant to pick myself back up when it's just one blow after another??
I've suffered from depression since I was 15, my mum was always a major support for me through my depressive episodes, and she was always there to give wise advice to me and to help with DS. Without her here I am struggling - I feel alone, lost, without a sense of direction. She was my best friend, life feels so empty without her. I don't know where to turn anymore. I don't know how to fix up my life. I am just so scattered and disorganized. I have days where just the simplest of tasks feel like too much of a burden. I've completely neglected my studies and will have to start all over again. My life is one big mess.
I saw my dr a few months ago and got a referral to a psych, but I'm scared to follow it up. I know I need to though. It just seems like a really scary step...
I just wish something positive would come our way this year.