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  1. #11
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    @Wise Enough that'll be the day 😄 he tried to blame me for this happening even though we both were not responsible. ** edited to say we were both irresponsible

  2. #12
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    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Hi @Surprisetimes2 and welcome to Bubhub! I'm just popping in to say I've been through a very similar experience with my former husband, right down to the lines of 'if you don't terminate you'll ruin my life' and holding me solely responsible, although I was only pregnant with one!

    I just wanted to say congratulations, and you are being extremely strong. Your little bubs will love you so much. It can be very hard at times, and there will be quite a range of emotions you will go through from fear to rage to grief to elation. I'm more than happy for you to chat to me or PM at any time if you just need a vent. I'm so glad you have a strong family behind you to support you. Good luck with your pregnancy, and maybe you can check out and join the DIG (due in group) on the hub. Most of us are pretty friendly :-)

  3. #13
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    Thank you @harvs. It's nice to hear from someone who has been through a similar situation and I appreciate the support.

    My family are funny - my parents and I hadn't talked for a few years (their choice) and my BIL told them about my pg and now we talk again. It's still a bit awkward from my point of view but they are offering lots of support and I know I'll need help later on. They're really excited about the twins so it's good.

    I've joined the Feb 15 DIG and the ladies there seem lovely so far. I haven't read through much further than a page though so not sure of everyone's situation.

  4. #14
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    Congrats! I have 1 yo twins, but I'm lucky enough to get a bit of help from the father.

    join you local multiple births club. I don't know what state you are in but in my state they have a home help program and you can claim in home care for free when your twins are under 6 months. They have an online forum where u can chat to other multi mummas that are in the same situation as you.

    Be prepared to finish work earlier, twin pregnancys are hard work and you want to bake them for as long as possible.

    having twins is such a blessing but such hard work at the same time. I know some amazing single twin mummas, so it can be done.good luck x

  5. #15
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    munchkin05 is offline just me, my boy and my baby bump
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    Hi
    I've been in your exact position
    My daughter is now 2 years old and her father has nothing to do with her (his choice) even tho we only live 5 mins away from each other !!!!

    Good luck you sound like you are very determined and independent your twins are lucky to have a mum like you

  6. #16
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    Hi i have to respond with saying, go you! It sounds like you're in a really good position to be going through a scary as unknown event. I was single preg not too long ago. And you know what, it might not seem like it, but it's not totally bad the fob is out, I almost feel jealous! Egh. Your situation kind of sounds great! You will manage, just hang on and ride the sh!t storms at times, and embrace the rest . Congratulations.

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    Thanks for the kind words ladies. It's good to know there are others out there in similar positions and I appreciate the tips too.

    I'll hopefully work till the week before Christmas when I'll be about 31 weeks but I'm prepared for anything being that it's twins. From what I've read it's best to remain as open to whatever may come as possible with twins.

  8. #18
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    Congratulations on not 1 but 2 amazing bubba's



    I agree with what all the girls above said

    Join the local AMBA - they are great.

    the biggest thing is that you will need to learn how to accept help ... and to ask for it if its not offered (or if the help offered isnt what you actually need)

    People DO genuinely want to help - and you WILL need it.


  9. #19
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    Thanks @BH-KatiesMum and that is probably going to be an issue. I tend to try and just cope and get on with things on my own cos it's easier or I don't want to bother anyone. My mum has said her boss is going to let her take some time off when my sister's baby and my two are born so I'm guessing she'll be around a bit which will be good.

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Surprisetimes2 View Post
    Hi. I'm sure I'm not in a unique situation although for my age perhaps one of the rarer cases.

    I'm 33, single and pg with twins. FOB wants nothing to do with it, asked me to terminate and reckons this is going to ruin his life. Can't figure out how seeing as I've asked him for nothing and he certainly hasn't offered anything, let alone the fact it's not him going through the pg. He gets to go on as though nothing is happening.

    Anyway, I am happy about the babies and can't wait to see them on the monitor again in a few weeks time. My parents are happy about it too and my sister is also pg with their third - 10 days ahead of me - so I'm not short of someone to talk to and share this with.

    However, none of them have been in this situation so I feel a bit alone in that respect. I only recently at the beginning of the year bought my own house after separating from my husband early last year (yes my track record with men is awesome), my car loan will be paid off by early next year or earlier if I can manage it, my HECS should be paid off now that I've done my tax return, and I have a small credit card debt which I'm hoping my tax return will help pay off. I will get the govt PPL and paid maternity leave for 14 wks from my employer. In spite of this I'm still not sure I'm going to survive, especially with reduced pay from the PPL and 20 weeks with no pay.

    How do people cope both financially and emotionally as single parents and more specifically as a single parent of twins in the first year?
    My sister was 19 and in exactly the same situation as you funnily enough we where pregnant together to I was having my third I can't offer much advice but she got through with family support with out everyone helping her I'm not sure how well she would have coped with twins at her age with no partner. Her partner was cheating so she left him at 10 weeks pregnant. She had identical twin girl naturally at full term she had cardiomyopathy as a baby so has a few health issues. She lived with our mother and got her support from there. She moved out when the girls where around 18 months old and has been doing well on her own since


    Me + DP 01.03.2010 = DD 22.02.2011 + DS 20.01.2014 =


 

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