+ Reply to Thread
Page 11 of 22 FirstFirst ... 91011121321 ... LastLast
Results 101 to 110 of 214
  1. #101
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7,878
    Thanks
    3,397
    Thanked
    5,160
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by jesssalee View Post
    I agree, this isn't about the wedding, this seems more like a last straw situation with your SIL.

    I don't understand why you are attaching so much blame to her. Your brother is a grown man! He needs to man up and tell his fiancé "no, I want to invite my nieces". If he's not doing that, I can only assume he doesn't care enough, which while disappointing, is not his bride's fault.
    Good point. The wedding issue is with your brother, it's his responsibility to deal with his family.

  2. #102
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    7,053
    Thanks
    6,263
    Thanked
    5,481
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a weekBusiest Member of the Week - Most posts for the week ending 5/6/2014
    Quote Originally Posted by jesssalee View Post
    I agree, this isn't about the wedding, this seems more like a last straw situation with your SIL.

    I don't understand why you are attaching so much blame to her. Your brother is a grown man! He needs to man up and tell his fiancé "no, I want to invite my nieces". If he's not doing that, I can only assume he doesn't care enough, which while disappointing, is not his bride's fault.
    I really dont agree that it means ge doesn't care enough. Controlling partners can be women too, not just men. If the situation were reversed the man would be called controlling. Its not always as simple as just standing up to you're partner or you simply dont care enough.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  3. #103
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6,311
    Thanks
    2,387
    Thanked
    4,599
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I get the distinct impression the SIL will be thrilled with the no speakies threat and desperately hoping you follow through, OP.

  4. The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to NancyBlackett For This Useful Post:

    atomicmama  (14-07-2014),babyla  (14-07-2014),Chippa  (14-07-2014),DarcyJ  (14-07-2014),Mmumm  (14-07-2014),Mokeybear  (14-07-2014),munchkin275  (14-07-2014),Stiflers Mom  (14-07-2014)

  5. #104
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    4,094
    Thanks
    1,386
    Thanked
    1,357
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    I really dont agree that it means ge doesn't care enough. Controlling partners can be women too, not just men. If the situation were reversed the man would be called controlling. Its not always as simple as just standing up to you're partner or you simply dont care enough.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    Yes, I also think maybe he would prefer no kids at the wedding either, I doubt it's because he doesn't care.. It also doesn't mean he doesn't love his nieces! People without kids don't see it as a big deal themselves until they do have kids.

    I don't think it would be anything personal towards the kids, it's more a case of wanting to enjoy their special day without interruptions.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to SAgirl For This Useful Post:

    jesssalee  (14-07-2014)

  7. #105
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    2,478
    Thanks
    179
    Thanked
    784
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by jesssalee View Post
    I agree, this isn't about the wedding, this seems more like a last straw situation with your SIL.

    I don't understand why you are attaching so much blame to her. Your brother is a grown man! He needs to man up and tell his fiancé "no, I want to invite my nieces". If he's not doing that, I can only assume he doesn't care enough, which while disappointing, is not his bride's fault.
    I am attaching so mum blame to her because of her track record when It comes to my brothers side of the family. She makes it obvious what she thinks of our family. If she doesn't cancel the fortnightly dinner at my mums house then she makes an appearance and sits there on her phone the whole time before leaving ear. She is very controlling to a point where my brother has any internet shopping he does sent to our mums house so that she does not know what he is spending money on.

    This whole issue has stemmed from her BUT he is just as much to blame because he is going along with it which is why I am so hurt.

    I am not just upset that my kids are not invited to a wedding,I would like a night out just as much as everybody else. It's not a child free wedding because other children are invited' mine aren't. When my mum asked my brother why his response was "I just want *** to have a nice day". So yeah my family is being singled out and I am super hurt.

  8. #106
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    2,478
    Thanks
    179
    Thanked
    784
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by NancyBlackett View Post
    I get the distinct impression the SIL will be thrilled with the no speakies threat and desperately hoping you follow through, OP.
    Absolutely. And it's not a threat, I will follow through.

    It's going to come to a point one day when my brother has no family left as they will have successfully ostracised everybody. I know that is what she wants and I give up.

  9. #107
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,083
    Thanks
    200
    Thanked
    425
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I was in the same situation...my bro got married and we were told no children so DH couldnt go...we dont have any other family except my mum who was obviously going to the wedding. I was ok with it i guess as they are not kid people but when we got there, the brides nephew (her brother's child) was there. That really hurt as it felt like my kids were excluded and others werent.

    I feel your pain.

  10. #108
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    At the beach
    Posts
    10,495
    Thanks
    1,430
    Thanked
    9,003
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/10/14100 Posts in a week
    I've read all the replies and after seeing many wedding threads on this site I have come to the conclusion that I call bullshiz on the argument "it's their day they can do what they want". Rubbish. Weddings are not just about the bride and groom; it's about family. If people can't see how their decisions about who they invite or don't invite hurt people in their immediate family then sorry but they are being selfish.

    I know because I was when we got married. I put my foot down about who could or couldn't come and DH overruled me. And I'm glad he did as the people I was concerned about didn't impact on our day in the slightest, and it made his parents very happy that they were there.

    And yes we had kids (my nieces and nephews).

    Sometimes it's about a bigger picture.

  11. The Following 20 Users Say Thank You to Sonja For This Useful Post:

    AdornedWithCats  (14-07-2014),AngelicHobgoblin  (14-07-2014),Busy-Bee  (14-07-2014),cheekychook  (14-07-2014),Chippa  (14-07-2014),ExcuseMyFrench  (14-07-2014),grumpybump  (14-07-2014),lilypily  (14-07-2014),misho  (14-07-2014),MummaOJ  (14-07-2014),NoteToSelf  (14-07-2014),OneBabyBoy  (14-07-2014),Pearlygirl  (14-07-2014),PipersMummy  (14-07-2014),Ra Ra Superstar  (14-07-2014),RobinSparkles  (14-07-2014),Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (14-07-2014),smallpotatoes  (14-07-2014),snowqu33n  (14-07-2014),zooey  (14-07-2014)

  12. #109
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Mortlake, VIC
    Posts
    1,672
    Thanks
    444
    Thanked
    831
    Reviews
    7
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Disagree it's about the bride and groom not family, the family have the honour of being there it's not their wedding

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to Mum2b87 For This Useful Post:

    TheGooch  (14-07-2014)

  14. #110
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    2,309
    Thanks
    661
    Thanked
    1,194
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    My DH has a child from a previous marriage and we didn't even have him at our wedding, let alone any other children. When we told SS, who was 7 at the time, that we were getting married his response was "weddings are boring".

    From that point on we decided that a child-free wedding was the way to go as we figured if he felt that way it was quite likely some of our friends children would feel exactly the same. As it turned out all of our friends were more than happy to find babysitters for the night so they could kick up their heels a bit.

    Ultimately it's the bride and groom who decide how they want to celebrate their day and you have to respect their wishes, whether or not you agree with them.

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to Cat74 For This Useful Post:

    TheGooch  (14-07-2014)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 3
    Last Post: 22-01-2014, 22:51
  2. Replies: 26
    Last Post: 14-01-2014, 09:19
  3. What would you do with a CHILD FREE day??!!
    By 2boofulgals in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 16-08-2013, 21:55

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Springfree Trampoline
Give the Ultimate Christmas Gift Springfree Trampoline
The World's Safest Trampoline™ is now also the world's first Smart Trampoline™. Sensors on the mat detect your every move and your jumps control fun, educational and active games on tablet. Secure the Ultimate Christmas Gift today!
sales & new stuffsee all
Pea Pods
Buy 2 Award Winning Pea Pods Reusable One Size Nappies for only $38 (in your choice of colours) and receive a FREE roll of Bamboo Liners. Don't miss out, we don't usually have discounts on the nappies, so grab this special offer!
Special Offer! Save $12
featured supporter
Sudocrem / Infacol
Sudocrem® Healing Cream is a soothing emollient cream which aids and assists in the management of nappy rash, eczema, abrasions, wounds and minor skin irritations. Infacol Wind Drops are an effective method of treating wind in infants.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!