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  1. #11
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    He's 6 days old. Thanks ill think about a dummy, DH isnt very keen but if it helps im willing to give it a go

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  2. #12
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    Ps. I think the ABA are anti-dummies, (and I am an ABA Member!!)...but they aren't up all night. A dummy allowed me to get 4 hours sleep between feeds overnight.

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  3. #13
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    Have you considered offering a dummy? I know some people say it can effect your milk supply but I don't anyone who used a dummy and it affected their ability to breastfeed. It can give your nipples a much needed rest.

    Yeah it's kinda a secret that the newborn days are complete hell- I guess people don't want to scare others off and looking back it does pass quickly- though not when you're going through it! I knew it would be hard but I had no freaking clue what a nightmare it was just even going to the toilet or shower was a victory.

    Hang in there Hun and don't feel you have to co-sleep/use formula/ compromise on how you wish to parent. There are solutions out there and it will get easier xxx

    Eta:I took so long writing and somebody beat me to it lol. And yes I used a dummy from 5 days, am still breastfeeding at 17 months no issues. It made the world of difference. I wasn't keen on dummies either but things change!
    Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 11-07-2014 at 06:36.

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  5. #14
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    Snap Little Miss Sunshine!! I breastfed my son, and used a dummy too. Am breastfeeding my 12-month-old, and using a dummy. It never affected my supply or confused bub...ever. Dummies are a mother's best friend in my opinion!! They may not be PC, but who cares!! It enabled me to survive the newborn days...and enjoy them. (You will find older women who had babies in the "olden days", are all for them!...My 60 yo Mum advised me to pack one in my hospital bag!!).

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  7. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by heartstringz View Post
    Oh god Misho, do i have to do this for 6 weeks? How is doing what im currently doing 24/7 for that long even sustainable?

    Misho what did you sleep upright in? I have a glider chair but im terrified he's going to roll off my lap if I fall asleep in that.

    I dont nurse in bed or even in our bedroom (a chair wont fit) I have to go out to the lounge room. Therefore its impossible to get out of my chair, carry him down the hall & put him down without him waking up.

    DH helps where he can but he cant feed bub as im still struggling to express

    I dont know who to ask for help. The ABA just said I'll have to cosleep with him & thats the onlt thing I can do, but im not comfortable with that.

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    Look into the bednest, or other 'sidecar bassinet/cots.' Sit up in bed propped against the wall or headboard when feeding and then just practice laying him down. I promise you'll work it out and he'll eventually not wake. Try a tshirt that smells like you as well, or stick a wrap down your top for a bit. With what I'm describing he's still sleeping next to you but not actually in bed with you, so the benefits of co-sleeping with the reassurance that he's in his own safe sleep space. When he stirs you can rest your hand firmly on him, pat him, etc. while you still lay down and sleep.

    It's does get easier, I promise!

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    heartstringz  (11-07-2014)

  9. #16
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    I just wanted to say that you're not doing anything wrong Bubs is behaving completely normal. I had a perma feeding baby for 3-4 months (but I had supply issues most likely from a severe PPH).

    One way to sooth bubs when they are all cranky when you're trying to feed them is to express some milk into a very small cup, sit bubs up and offer it them them as a drink. They will drink it like a cat does. I was given this advice from an LC when I had DS and it worked really well. DS no longer believed I was trying to kill him and we could both regain our composure and try again.

    Unfortunately my only suggestion for getting sleep with a perma feeding baby is to learn how to feed lying down but you've said that that is not for you.

    The only other suggestion I have is to try swaddling or a sling.

    Best of luck and feel free to come back here any time to cry, vent or do what ever you need to do. BF can be really hard work. Everyone seems to focus on getting through labour, pfft. For some of us labour is a walk in the park compared to BF!

    You are doing an awesome job. Just focus on getting through one feed or one day at a time.

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  11. #17
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    I'd be cautious with the dummy at this point.
    Ive breastfed all my 5 babies and used a dummy from day 2 with 3 of them (2 would not take one much to my horror) but we had no issues with great feeding from birth.
    Seeing as you've had a few hiccups it might interfere.
    The first 6 weeks can be very rough. Some babies need you to devote your entire existence to them. Sounds normal to me, I've been exactly where you are, 5 times!
    Though my first and fifth were the hardest, the ones who didn't take dummies.
    I bed share so co sleep is my advice too but I couldn't feed my fifth laying down as he had horrible reflux from a week old. I fell asleep holding him every night for the first 6 weeks. It was gruelling but I'm here and pregnant again lol
    Can you switch your chair for a recliner? It would be pretty hard to drop the baby in there? Sounds scary to say that stuff but face it we have to find compromises to survive!
    Breastfeeding overall can be hard work, there will be growth spurts and fussing later on too. Sorry no real advice, I believe people should find their own way, but just empathy because I know the feeling.
    It's such early days so it's impossible to know how and when he will settle.
    I hope you find something that works for you. Go easy on yourself, such a tender time, and hard but it will pass

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    heartstringz  (11-07-2014)

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    Those early days are tough! My 4 month old has been fully breastfed and loves his dummy- no effects to my milk supply and it helps him sleep! We introduced it from 2 weeks old and im so glad we did. I would also suggest using a firm pillow propped up to feed in bed and a co-sleeper bassinet with something with you smell inside.

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    Is it possible that he's just struggling to stay asleep and it's not that he wants more food? The hands in mouth was a tired sign for my son and I spent ages feeding and feeding him because I thought he wanted more food! Maybe try resettling him rather than feeding again?

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  17. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heids89 View Post
    Those early days are tough! My 4 month old has been fully breastfed and loves his dummy- no effects to my milk supply and it helps him sleep! We introduced it from 2 weeks old and im so glad we did. I would also suggest using a firm pillow propped up to feed in bed and a co-sleeper bassinet with something with you smell inside.
    We introduced the dummy from two weeks as well and no problems.

    I'm too scared to feed lying down and to co-sleep so sitting up in bed and a co-sleeper cot is what helped me survive. Also saves time and energy (making it easier to fall back asleep faster) staying in bed and not having to get up and go someplace else.

    Heartstringz, like pp said above, you're doing great, this is all normal and it does get so much easier!

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