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  1. #1
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    Default Child care workers annoying me a bit

    So i have always had a hell of a time getting DS to wear a hat in summer or a beanie when it's cold. So i took him out one day a few weeks ago and picked out a beanie for him and he took a instant liking to it. I bought it for him and he just now wears it allll the time. He LOVES it. He calls out to his beanie when he can't find it... "beanie.. beanie.. Where's my beanie?" and i personally love it because it's cute, and it gives him comfort and warmth.

    And since I have been pregnant he is more clingy with DH and I, and not wanting to go to childcare as much. But the days he goes apparently he is wanting to wear his beanie all day and even sleep in it. The child care workers are seeming to be making a big deal out of it... a week ago when i dropped him off two of the younger workers approached me and asked me if everything is ok with DS. I said he is fine - he slept well - he's not sick ... he is happy. why? and they said they are very concerned with his attachment to his beanie and wondering if everything is ok at home! i told them i have had a hard time getting him to wear it, now that he loves it i am happy! But they were acting all concerned about it.... it left me feeling rather peeved off. They also told me on one of the days he was grumpy, which wasn't like his usual happy smiley self.... and they were concerned about it....The way they approached me about it made me feel uncomfortable and as if they are feeling DS has issues or something. He's only 2. I told them its probably just a stage he is going though, and also we are doing a lot at home with his grandparents over all the time helping with the house for the market, lots of painting etc which DS is loving... he prob feels like he is missing out now when he goes to childcare. And they shrugged and it was left at that but it seemed like they still had the opinion that this was all very strange behavior.

    On one of the days this week when i dropped him off they were all outside, and other kids were wearing beanies.... one of the workers picked DS up, took off his beanie even though it was freezing and asked him if he was going to 'part with his beanie today' DS reached for it asking for it back and they laughed... I felt annoyed and asked her to please let him wear it especially outside as its cold. They gave it back to him, but i don't understand why they're making this big deal out of it. Why take it from him but let other kids wear theirs? DS has only just started to not fall sick with anything and everything and i truly believe its because he is finally keeping warmer.

    Do you think their behavior is odd? Is it really that unusual for a 2 year old toddler to have a favorite thing and want to wear it or whatever all the time?
    Last edited by Serenity Love; 20-06-2014 at 23:49.

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    Oh my goodness that sounds so cute! And I wish my 19 month old would love his beanie like that. I'd be peeved too and I think the behaviour of the carers is inappropriate. I'd have a word to the centre director and tell them you're feeling uncomfortable with the questions from the carers and their attitude to the beanie. Don't forget, a lot of the carers are very young and not yet parents themselves.

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    Id honestly be looking for a different daycare.

    Regardless of anything else, the fact they took it off him then laughed about when he wanted it back? no way, so incredibly wrong and disrespectful! Your poor DS to have to go through that.

    I think its very normal for a 2 year old to get attached to something. When DD1 was 2 she wouldnt go anywhere without a specific plastic cup and a handful of plastic spoons... They came everywhere with us and she even slept with them (weird!) but they were something she felt safe and comforted by.

    If his beanie makes him happy, so be it. It isnt hurting anyone.

    As above, id be looking for different care.



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    Quote Originally Posted by Sally1981 View Post
    Oh my goodness that sounds so cute! And I wish my 19 month old would love his beanie like that. I'd be peeved too and I think the behaviour of the carers is inappropriate. I'd have a word to the centre director and tell them you're feeling uncomfortable with the questions from the carers and their attitude to the beanie. Don't forget, a lot of the carers are very young and not yet parents themselves.
    Yeah the two carer's that really made a massive deal out of it are pretty young - like real early 20's if that. DH told me that its because they're not mum's themselves so they just don't get it. I have noticed the older mother carer's think DS is being cute with his beanie... but they are still also mentioning it every day and trying to coax the beanie off DS which i am also feeling annoyed about.

    Im not sure i feel comfortable approaching the manager about this as they ripped us off $50 and refused to pay it back, and we had to just suck it up and let it go. DH got really p!ssed with the manager and they argued, and I cancelled the direct debit from the banks end so we could just pay over the counter and ever since we did that the manager has been very cold and not approachable.

    Its making me wonder if they are picking on DS now because of that payment dispute.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CupidsVictim View Post
    Id honestly be looking for a different daycare.

    Regardless of anything else, the fact they took it off him then laughed about when he wanted it back? no way, so incredibly wrong and disrespectful! Your poor DS to have to go through that.

    I think its very normal for a 2 year old to get attached to something. When DD1 was 2 she wouldnt go anywhere without a specific plastic cup and a handful of plastic spoons... They came everywhere with us and she even slept with them (weird!) but they were something she felt safe and comforted by.

    If his beanie makes him happy, so be it. It isnt hurting anyone.

    As above, id be looking for different care.



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    Thank you so much for sharing, i feel a lot better now about DS's love for his beanie. He cuddles it like his Monkey teddy. It makes me happy to see him loving it like he does ....

    I am tempted to remove him... but we're also only there for another 3 months so maybe ill just try sorting it out more as it happens as we wont be able to afford to cough up the ridiculous fee's to join a new place. Its just hard leaving our precious ones with people and wondering what is actually going on. DH picked DS up the rest of the week and he did say since i showed annoyance when they took it and laughed they haven't mentioned his beanie since. Its annoying i even have to get annoyed about it though... they should know better than to treat a little kid like that.

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    I'm pretty relaxed with my daycare, I go with the flow regarding most things. But this would bother me OP. It's just stepping over the line IMO. If your 2
    year old wants his beanie, gets comfort from it then leave him alone. Go and have a quiet word with them and just say "we are not bothered by DS beanie attachment please don't let it bother you, we are happy to let him wear it inside and for sleeping".

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    Yes their attitude and actions sound very odd and unfair to me! And I'm an ex childcare worker! I would be very peeved off if I were in your situation! I feel qualified to say this and I'm sorry if I offend any childcare workers out there.... but sometimes they think they know it all. (especially the young. And I can say that, because I was once a very young childcare worker [who had studied and 'knew it all'] and I became an older one and I changed a lot over time and experience.) (and now that I'm a Mum I would be very different again as a childcare worker if I ever return to that job - but I probably won't!) If they don't listen to you, I say it's time to have a chat to their director and make it clear how you feel. I can't believe they are making such a big deal out of something just so simple and innocent!

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    That would annoy me no
    End.

    He is 2 and it's normal to be attached to something.

    I would turn it on them next time and say... Well everything is normal at home and he is happy.. It seems the only issue is here so why is that?


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    I think removing him is extremely drastic action for what has occurred. It would be a huge upheaval for all of you during a time of lots of other change in his life. I would speak to them and be quite firm that they are to let him wear his beanie and not make such a big deal about it. Speak to the room staff and the director about it. Have a look at the National Quality Framework for child care, the Early Years Learning framework, and your centre's policy statement and point out where they're flouting their own rules.
    FFS, how ridiculous. Just let him wear the beanie! It's not hurting anyone. They're just making life harder for everyone by going on about it

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    I think removing him is extremely drastic action for what has occurred. It would be a huge upheaval for all of you during a time of lots of other change in his life. I would speak to them and be quite firm that they are to let him wear his beanie and not make such a big deal about it. Speak to the room staff and the director about it. Have a look at the National Quality Framework for child care, the Early Years Learning framework, and your centre's policy statement and point out where they're flouting their own rules.
    FFS, how ridiculous. Just let him wear the beanie! It's not hurting anyone. They're just making life harder for everyone by going on about it
    I agree. Your leaving in 3 months anyway, just stick it out. I'm sure the carers didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, why don't you talk to them again and tell them how they made you feel. I'm sure they'll apologise and move on. Who's the room leader/ teacher? Could you talk to them instead of the director?

    And yes, it's a beanie..what's their problem for Pete's sake!
    Last edited by Koarlo; 21-06-2014 at 08:08.


 

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