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  1. #1
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    Default Am I a bad for delaying these 2 things for 2yr old ds

    Be completely honest with me please..
    Ds is 26 months.. he hasnt shown any interest in toilet training so I havnt pushed it.. I do offer the potty but not keen..he has done the odd wee on it.
    He is also still in a cot.
    When people at work have heard this I get looks like what the! What am I doing to raise my son correctly??
    Should I be trying harder with potty? Is it bad he is in a cot? He is my first baby so how am I to know what it right? That's why I love this forum I get to learn a heap so please be honest with me and tell me if u think im a bit late with these two things and any suggestions on books to help ds understand potty and help me train him appreciated!

    Thanks

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    No to both.

    Kids can stay in a cot as long as they want. My dauggter was 4 when I changed her. She loved her cot plus it was easy to throw yhe soft toys in every morning to clean up.

    Kids toilet train at different rates. My son was 4 and my daughter self trained at 15 months. Pushing toilet training can actually be harmful.

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    I see no issue with either at his age.

    Lots of boys aren't ready to toilet train until they are closer to 3 years old. As for the cot, I see no problem with it as long as he still has room to move (standard cots are pretty roomy these days).

    Unfortunately, people are always going to add their two cents on parenting matters, which makes you question and sometimes doubt yourself.

    I say do what feels right for you and your DS.

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    Agree with above.

    They will let you know when they are ready to TT. If they aren't ready it could be an extremely difficult thing to get through.

    As for the cot, they can stay in as long as they still fit. I wouldn't worry at all.

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    I agree, we left toilet training until he was nearly three and we were sure he was ready, it was easy to be honest, I wouldn't even call it training!

    As for the cot, I wouldn't move until they either start climbing out (it's a safety issue then) or out grow it.

    Ignore what others say, once you become a parent people automatically think it's ok to advise/criticise/judge you. I still co sleep with my 4.5 year old, I've learnt to just smile, nod and not give a stuff about what people think about that!

  6. #6
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    MilkingMaid is offline Winner 2009 - Mod Award - most supportive member
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    After 3 kids, I am a great fan of 'whatever works for my family'

    The things you describe are simply preferences, there is no inherent harm in what you are doing, if it is working for you, keep at it!

    My only comment is that I feel the whole 'potty training' thing comes at it from the wrong angle, a freind of mine always talked about 'toilet awareness' and that was about the child themselves having an awareness of what their body was doing, and for them to start recognising the feelings in their own bodies that told them when they would need to go to the toilet, rather than the parent having an arbitrary date when they 'potty train' the child.

    It's a much more gentle 'with' your child approach, might want to read up on it if you think your son might be ready to start thinking about his own body cues, and linking them to going to the toilet.

    Honestly, no rush!
    Last edited by MilkingMaid; 20-06-2014 at 09:13.

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    Sounds pretty normal to me.

    Only a few kids are totally tt at that age. It really no biggie.

    Does it really matter when they go out of there cot. If they fit and your both happy than do it.

    If it is bothering you and you want too you could make the cot into a toddler bed by taking the side off and lowering the base of the cot.

    Sent from my SM-N9005 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Hi OP - sounds totally fine to me :-)

    My DS is almost 3 and still in his cot - and he will stay there until he either tries to climb out, gets too big for it or asks to move to a big bed.

    My DS is in undies at the moment. He asked to wear them one day about two weeks ago but before that he showed no interest in toilet training at all (my lounge room floor rug was destroyed in the process - so many accidents). He just didn't get it or care really. He now tells me when he needs to go - amazing. He clearly wasn't ready any earlier.

    This parenting caper is tough - so many decisions and second guessing yourself!

    Best wishes.

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    I have now read 2 books on TT and seen a doctor for DS and all say to ignore the outside pressure! It's utterly untrue that kids should be TT early as for so many kids the accidents will continue whether they are in undies or a nappy so all it achieves is massive stress on everyone involved when it doesn't work. Read this book (you can get ebook version), it's very eye-opening: 'It's no accident' by Dr Hodges.

    And tell people to be quiet when they try to make you feel like it's your fault.

    Edit: I think a big part of the problem is that one kids turn 3 and go into ore-school they are no longer to wear nappy-pants and must wear underwear and use the toilet. That needs to change imo and they need to be more flexible as pre-school carers themselves admit so many kids keep having accidents.
    Last edited by Ellewood; 20-06-2014 at 09:29.

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    I decided that my son was ready for tt at 2 and then spent seven months (!!!) having various amounts of success. After three weeks of near constant accidents, I decided to go back to nappies and try again later. Best decision ever! I wish I'd saved us all the stress in hindsight and waited. As for the cot, he's still in a cot and will be until he is at least three. My husband thinks we should move him to a queen mattress on the floor once we settle in our new house (a while away still) and I'm unconvinced, but I guess we will see!!


 

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