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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by oozzle View Post
    If he was even slightly mature, then absolutely I should say something. I totally agree with standing up for him in any other situation.. My ex is a massive 'guilter'.. My son didn't even want to tell me in case I said something to him because then next time he's there he'll get picked at for dobbing on him Wasn't long ago that my son had a party to go to on his dad's weekend and when he called him to see if it was ok to go, he started the whole 'oh you don't love your old man hey? Rather hang out with kids you see all the time hey?' type crap... I would feel awful for DS to go there and be moaned at the whole time.. So annoying though coz if it was an issue of money for him, I could've sent something over for him to give him.
    I understand completely, as my ex is the same. If I say something about an issue the kids hear about it on the next visit.

    DD wouldn't come out of her classroom last Friday as she knew she was going to her Dads for the weekend. She was in there in tears with her teacher. If I say something she will cop it from her Dad .....he has also told her "Don't tell Mummy anything bad that happens here".

    So I focus on them and trying to help them deal with the horrid person he is

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    oozzle  (04-06-2014)

  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheerilee View Post
    I understand completely, as my ex is the same. If I say something about an issue the kids hear about it on the next visit.

    DD wouldn't come out of her classroom last Friday as she knew she was going to her Dads for the weekend. She was in there in tears with her teacher. If I say something she will cop it from her Dad .....he has also told her "Don't tell Mummy anything bad that happens here".

    So I focus on them and trying to help them deal with the horrid person he is
    Your poor daughter It's just horrible isn't it? My son is the same sometimes, really uneasy about going with his dad lately.
    the other thing I noticed is that when DS is with his dad! he won't talk to me or hug me, he stands there stiff as a board and looks very uncomfortable. As soon as his dad leaves, he seems to exhale and relax. Hate that his dad makes him so uptight, it's not good for him.

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    PomPoms  (04-06-2014)

  5. #23
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    MilkingMaid is offline Winner 2009 - Mod Award - most supportive member
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    No they are lucky to even get a phone call. The last time he said he would ring, he never did, the last time they saw him was 8 months ago (for 3 days) and before that it was 13 months since they had seen him.

    He does live in the next country, but still majorly slack and uninvested.

  6. #24
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    My kids don't even get a phone call on their birthdays or Christmas. Then he gets all hurt when they don't ring him for Father's Day.

  7. #25
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    Some real deadbeats out there, our kids deserve better!

    I have been been blasted for not getting DS to call him on Father's Day morning as soon as he woke up, never mind that he spent the hours between 12 pm and 5 pm with him on that day.. Man I copped it over that!

    DS and I have a great relationship thankfully, he has apologised to me for being strange when his dad is there. It stings but I can't be upset about it. If it makes his time with his dad more stress free, I'm happy for him to do it..

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  9. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by oozzle View Post
    Your poor daughter It's just horrible isn't it? My son is the same sometimes, really uneasy about going with his dad lately.
    the other thing I noticed is that when DS is with his dad! he won't talk to me or hug me, he stands there stiff as a board and looks very uncomfortable. As soon as his dad leaves, he seems to exhale and relax. Hate that his dad makes him so uptight, it's not good for him.
    It must be so stressful for them . I feel so bad for your son!

    It is great though he can relax and be himself with you

  10. #27
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    No way. DD is almost three and has never received a birthday or Christmas present... Although I should be surprised. In the four years we were together, Ex bought me a present once...

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    My ex lives in Vic and we live in Qld so he has only bothered to see the kids once in 3 years that we've been split up. So yeah that once he bought our daughter a bday pressie and an xmas pressie and our son an xmas pressie but no bday pressie. Every other year he gives them nothing.

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    Birthdays, yes, they usually get something. Christmas no, that has now, since last xmas, gone to the way side. Because he doesn't see them for the whole xmas holidays, so the kids don't have any xmas presents to open when they go back to see him in Feb. If I have the kids on the week of fathers day, he doesn't want them, and won't even answer the phone if I ask the kids if they want to call him. Same with xmas day, I ask if they want to call him, DS does, DD won't. But he usually doesn't answer his phone. WTF is with that ? I just shake my head sometimes, and leave it be. The kids will or have worked it out what he is like. So sad

  13. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by oozzle View Post
    If he was even slightly mature, then absolutely I should say something. I totally agree with standing up for him in any other situation.. My ex is a massive 'guilter'.. My son didn't even want to tell me in case I said something to him because then next time he's there he'll get picked at for dobbing on him Wasn't long ago that my son had a party to go to on his dad's weekend and when he called him to see if it was ok to go, he started the whole 'oh you don't love your old man hey? Rather hang out with kids you see all the time hey?' type crap... I would feel awful for DS to go there and be moaned at the whole time.. So annoying though coz if it was an issue of money for him, I could've sent something over for him to give him.
    Ahhhhhh.
    I've read the rest of the responses.
    What is WRONG with some people?
    I'm sorry you and your son are in this position.
    Same goes to all the other people with douche exes.
    Last edited by moongazer; 04-06-2014 at 20:27.


 

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