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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    You didn't. But the post Allie originally responded to judged parents who take devices out with them to entertain children. "I don't like it when I see parents blah blah blah". Allie was simply saying in response not every child responds to colouring and teddies.

    So, to be fair to Allie she probably felt judged because she is such parent. And because there might have been a time in her life where she also thought she wouldn't take devices with her but, guess what, she does.

    And for the record I don't when we go out (and I have 4 kids in tow), nor do I bribe, but who cares if other people do.

    One of the things that annoys me on this forum is a person's inability to say "I don't like xyz" and instead saying "I don't like it when other parents do xyz", when it's something that has zero impact on that person anyway.
    Of course, and I agree which is why I have said a couple of times that one way is not better than the other...but why if someone doesn't like someone saying 'I judge' blah blah blah' do they then get all smug and start with 'good luck with that' etc. etc. I just don't get it, and all I was trying to point out is that it is very possible that the OP will use teddies and books to distract her toddler when out, and perhaps it will work wonderfully for her, or perhaps it won't and she'll decide she no longer cares and packs an ipad in her bag for outings. Who gives a shiz. I don't even own an ipad or iphone, so maybe I've found it easier to stick to my choice of not wanting them is because they're not actually an option? Who knows. However, I still stand by my opinion that if it's important to a parent (note I said if it's important) to not use electronic devices then they'll find a way, regardless of the child's personality.

  2. #52
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    If I didn't let DS watch TV I'd never get anything done. He's almost 12 months, into everything, I can't leave him alone. Unless I put Charlie the Unicorn on repeat. Then he will sit there and not move. This is how I do my housework I also sometimes bring him into my bed in the morning and put ABC2 on so I can delay having to actually get up.

    Bad mummy.

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    HollyGolightly81  (29-05-2014)

  4. #53
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    DS (16 weeks) LOVES Made in Chelsea. Loves it. He laughs and chats with them, I think he thinks they're real people in our house and he's desperately trying to get them to smile back. I think it's hilarious. He's the same way when we're out in public, trying to get people to smile at him. He loves faces in general, whether it's the tv, real life or a toy, they are all met with smiles and intense chatting.

    I'm stuck inside a lot because it's raining (in London) or there's not enough time to get out between breastfeeding and a nap so I have the tv on a lot, I'd go crazy if I didn't. DS loves it but loves his toys as well. Sometimes I'll face him towards it because I know it will keep him happy so that I can eat, hang washing etc. I also sing to him, read to him, etc. I don't think it's effecting him negatively, he's a happy, smiley, social little man that likes to watch the faces. Maybe when he's older I'll make more of a point to turn it off or switch it to something age appropriate but right now I'm exhausted and the weather's crap.
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 29-05-2014 at 23:11.

  5. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    Of course, and I agree which is why I have said a couple of times that one way is not better than the other...but why if someone doesn't like someone saying 'I judge' blah blah blah' do they then get all smug and start with 'good luck with that' etc. etc. I just don't get it, and all I was trying to point out is that it is very possible that the OP will use teddies and books to distract her toddler when out, and perhaps it will work wonderfully for her, or perhaps it won't and she'll decide she no longer cares and packs an ipad in her bag for outings. Who gives a shiz. I don't even own an ipad or iphone, so maybe I've found it easier to stick to my choice of not wanting them is because they're not actually an option? Who knows. However, I still stand by my opinion that if it's important to a parent (note I said if it's important) to not use electronic devices then they'll find a way, regardless of the child's personality.
    I don't think she was being smug. I think she was being defensive. Which is natural when you feel judged.

    Anywho, just my two cents worth.

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    peanutmonkey  (29-05-2014)

  7. #55
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    Whoa I didn't expect such heated responses to a simple statement!

    I have never said anything to parents with iPads, or even given them a dirty look - because I don't know their circumstances and it's not my place to lecture them on their choices. There have already been days (and I know more will come) where my own actions have strayed from my parenting ideals for the sake of my own sanity - I'm honestly not trying to speak from a high horse here.

    I said I don't like seeing it because I think children are overly saturated with technology these days (generally speaking). As a Visual Arts teacher it's frightening to have witnessed a decline in attention span, skill with drawing/writing implements and ability to use their imagination. Children are far more geared towards computers and other devices than any of us during our childhoods because it simply wasn't available.

    Technology has its place and can be a very effective tool, however, I believe that it's currently overused in many situations. As my daughter grows I hope that we can guide her to achieve a balance between the lure of devices and so many other entertainment options which have been around far longer than our touch screens. That won't happen all the time I know, but I sure hope I don't get told off for daring to give my daughter a colouring book in a cafe.

  8. #56
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    I haven't read all the other comments... But no, my 13 month old is not allowed to watch tv. She isn't interested anyway, she would much rather terrorize the place

  9. #57
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    I have mine on as background noise but DD 7 months rarely even looks at it. I have used Baby Einstein on my phone when a car ride home turned completely mental with a screaming baby while stuck in a traffic jam. Worked amazingly when nothing else would! I agree that its a parenting decision that you make based on your child and circumstances.

    Sent from my GT-I9507 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  10. #58
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    I remember years ago watching Madonna on the Rosie O'Donnell show, rosie was talking about a time when she had babysat Lordes and Lordes was talking about how much she loved the Little Mermaid (or some other Disney movie). Rosie asked how did she know about the Little Mermaid when she wasn't allowed to watch TV and Lordes replied a bit snobby, 'I have the book.' Duh!
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 30-05-2014 at 04:36.

  11. #59
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    Wow there's some really strong opinions here!

    For the record, I'm pregnant so don't have any first hand experience with what I'll do yet.

    That said, we're not "tv as background noise" people, and while DH plays computer games for maybe an hour every night while I watch tv, and we both are on our phones or iPads while on the long (3 hr round trip) commute in opposite directions every day, that's about all the screen time we do at our house. I start my mat leave next week though, so that may increase or decrease!

    I don't intend to park my child in front of the tv or take the iPad along on every outing, but who knows? I think the old parenting mantra bears repeating here: "whatever works."

    Remember, when it comes to other peoples choices and they differ from your own plans, ideals or practices - they're not right, nor wrong, just different

  12. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    Of course, and I agree which is why I have said a couple of times that one way is not better than the other...but why if someone doesn't like someone saying 'I judge' blah blah blah' do they then get all smug and start with 'good luck with that' etc. etc. I just don't get it, and all I was trying to point out is that it is very possible that the OP will use teddies and books to distract her toddler when out, and perhaps it will work wonderfully for her, or perhaps it won't and she'll decide she no longer cares and packs an ipad in her bag for outings. Who gives a shiz. I don't even own an ipad or iphone, so maybe I've found it easier to stick to my choice of not wanting them is because they're not actually an option? Who knows. However, I still stand by my opinion that if it's important to a parent (note I said if it's important) to not use electronic devices then they'll find a way, regardless of the child's personality.
    As per your first post, I'm happy to agree to disagree on this as I know different things to be true for different people too.

    it wasn't me however that said good luck when your child is older, that was someone else.

    as yes some of you hit it in the head, I'm constantly being judged for how my daughter acts and all I can ever think is, you just don't knows what it must be like. For example she never sits with me for music time at playgroup, she runs off and continues to flit between the different toy stations, much to the group leaders clear annoyance. But what am I to do? I've tried getting her and bringing her back to sit on my lap, but she screams blue murder. I've tried reasoning with her, leaving playgroup right then and she misses out on her stamps - they don't work either.

    its bad enough I have to see the other chilled out, relaxed kids sit with their parents singing songs while I sit there by myself as DD explores more of her world, I bet they are the type of kids who will happily play with a teddy or a colouring in book in a cafe. Either that or their parents have the patience of angels listening to their child cry hysterically, wanting to leave the high chair, and maybe some parents can do that. I cannot. My blood pressure rises, i get stressed out, I can't eat my food (this was while trying every other distraction technique under the sun (all failing). I'm also not the type of parent to then stay home all the time because my toddler can't relax and be quiet without an iPad or iPhone.

    Sorry, so not having a go, I just think a little understanding that every child and every parent is different and blanket, I don't like this or I don't like that when people only see a tiny snippet of that family's life is fair for anyone.

    Sonya is correct too, there's a lot of things I thought I would or wouldn't do when I had kids, and it's safe to say most are out of the window now. But I've learnt through having kids and also being on bub hub that blanket rules do not apply (well beyond than providing basic needs of a safe, secure and healthy environment for your child, but also what makes that up is always up to individual circumstances).

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