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  1. #1
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    Default Confused about my son... possible ASD? Communication delay?

    I have an almost three year old son who perhaps can say 50-100 words. He knows all his letters and numbers to 20 or even higher. He knows all his letter sounds. He can attempt to say all his animals and animal sounds. He knows all his shapes- he loves shapes! He can tell the difference between an octagon and a pentagon, for example.

    If I point to pictures - he will tell me what those pictures are. He seems to understand most everything I say... BUT.....He does not really speak anything in the way of back and forth conversation unless I am pointing at a picture. If I ask him if he wants toast- he will take forever to nod yes (if I'm lucky) and he'll fetch his drink bottle or bowl if I ask. He will wave hi or bye or give someone a kiss, when asked... always only when asked. He sometimes points to objects he wants. He does not line up toys.

    He knows so many words and has *some* interaction so people tell me not to worry. He does not run on his tippy toes or spin circles but he does flap his hands, especially when tired or bored. I have not had him evaluated yet - we are on a waiting list and I will not get to the testing stage for another few months. He does go to a speech therapist who is helping him learn signs. He can sign 'more' but it's a variation of the proper sign. I do wonder about Autism. He often comes and takes my hand to lead me to what he wants. If I ask him to point to what he wants, he will do it.

    He is extremely affectionate, cuddly, and when he gives me a kiss, he says Mwah! When he falls down - he seeks me out for a hug and comfort. He does pretend play with a phone sometimes but mostly doesn't play with his toys except to throw them in the air or collect them in a huge, messy pile. He is gentle and careful most of the time, but does love jumping off his bed into a pile of pillows that he has collected from all over the house. He loves books and is a wiz on the computer and tablet. He is extremely obedient and listens and minds me at all times, and looks at Mommy & Daddy when we call his name. He attempts to say all types of words but when we ask him to say our names (Mom or Dad) he seems to not hear us and won't try. He will say his sister's name, Maddie; if we say Mad- he'll finish with -EE!

    His eye contact isn't constant, but he does frequently make eye-contact. He loves parks and playgrounds and riding his bike, though isn't really interested in the other kids. He's very athletic, kicks a ball (but not back and forth with us), and has good coordination. He loves going places with us and likes us to play with him on the playground equipment, count for him when he goes down the slide, etc. He smiles at us a lot, especially in an outdoor environment and on hikes. He loves the outdoors and going for walks. He could care less about routine. I am so confused! He gives us hope, yet I know many of these things are red flags.

    I would love to hear from others with similar experiences. He is a good boy and we love him very much. Thank you.

  2. #2
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    Is he choosing not to speak or does he not know how to? It sounds like he knows words etc and can say them from what you are saying. I taught a girl with selective mutism who had a good vocabulary but just didn't want to talk. I'm not trying to worry you or anything I just wanted to say that it isn't necessarily ASD :-). He sounds like a very clever little boy!

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  4. #3
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    The ASD spectrum is so broad. I think we all tick several boxes on any checklist.
    My DS has an ASD diagnosis, like your DS, ticks a lot of boxes, and some he doesn't or the behaviours are really inconsistent.
    I'd try not to stress and just see what the diagnostic process concludes.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    ayashe  (26-05-2014)

  6. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by ayashe View Post
    I have an almost three year old son who perhaps can say 50-100 words. He knows all his letters and numbers to 20 or even higher. He knows all his letter sounds. He can attempt to say all his animals and animal sounds. He knows all his shapes- he loves shapes! He can tell the difference between an octagon and a pentagon, for example.

    If I point to pictures - he will tell me what those pictures are. He seems to understand most everything I say... BUT.....He does not really speak anything in the way of back and forth conversation unless I am pointing at a picture. If I ask him if he wants toast- he will take forever to nod yes (if I'm lucky) and he'll fetch his drink bottle or bowl if I ask. He will wave hi or bye or give someone a kiss, when asked... always only when asked. He sometimes points to objects he wants. He does not line up toys.

    He knows so many words and has *some* interaction so people tell me not to worry. He does not run on his tippy toes or spin circles but he does flap his hands, especially when tired or bored. I have not had him evaluated yet - we are on a waiting list and I will not get to the testing stage for another few months. He does go to a speech therapist who is helping him learn signs. He can sign 'more' but it's a variation of the proper sign. I do wonder about Autism. He often comes and takes my hand to lead me to what he wants. If I ask him to point to what he wants, he will do it.

    He is extremely affectionate, cuddly, and when he gives me a kiss, he says Mwah! When he falls down - he seeks me out for a hug and comfort. He does pretend play with a phone sometimes but mostly doesn't play with his toys except to throw them in the air or collect them in a huge, messy pile. He is gentle and careful most of the time, but does love jumping off his bed into a pile of pillows that he has collected from all over the house. He loves books and is a wiz on the computer and tablet. He is extremely obedient and listens and minds me at all times, and looks at Mommy & Daddy when we call his name. He attempts to say all types of words but when we ask him to say our names (Mom or Dad) he seems to not hear us and won't try. He will say his sister's name, Maddie; if we say Mad- he'll finish with -EE!

    His eye contact isn't constant, but he does frequently make eye-contact. He loves parks and playgrounds and riding his bike, though isn't really interested in the other kids. He's very athletic, kicks a ball (but not back and forth with us), and has good coordination. He loves going places with us and likes us to play with him on the playground equipment, count for him when he goes down the slide, etc. He smiles at us a lot, especially in an outdoor environment and on hikes. He loves the outdoors and going for walks. He could care less about routine. I am so confused! He gives us hope, yet I know many of these things are red flags.

    I would love to hear from others with similar experiences. He is a good boy and we love him very much. Thank you.
    I have two sons with asd and he does sound a lot like my second. There are a lot of stereo typical things associated with autistic kids that never rang true with my boys. Especially the non affection thing, my first son is overly affectionate. And eye contact neither have had any problems there. As well both didn't care about routines but often don't react well to plans changing.
    The play thing really sounds like my second son. He never lined anything up ever but he loves to throw all his toys all around his room, he likes it that way. And the pillows! He started that at about 3 yr old, we called it him making a nest. He still does it at 5.5.
    He's also smart and friendly, likes other kids and has a great imagination.
    He was diagnosed last July.

    My eldest son was selective mute too, I see that a pp mentioned this.

    if you want to chat feel free to pm me, the kids are going a little silly here atm so sorry if my response seems disjointed!

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  8. #5
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    Hey, you are not alone.

    I have a 3 year old DS and we're waiting for a paed appointment as we need to establish whether he is on he spectrum or not.

    Our little guy has a very wide vocabulary, can name almost anything and has a fantastic memory but doesn't engage in conversation. He doesn't really ask or answer questions. If I ask him something like 'did you have a good sleep?' or 'where did you go today?' he won't say anything.

    What we have established from the observations of an OT, is that DS has low muscle tone, sensory issues and poor body awareness. He has a lot of trouble sitting still and needs OT. He's on a waiting list for that.

    It's hard, I go through stages where I think maybe he doesn't have ASD, then other times where it seems damn obvious.

    Happy to chat anytime

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  10. #6
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    I think that if he is able to communicate with you i.e. receptive communication where he understands what you are saying and asking of him to some degree and some expressive communication verbal or non verbal where he can show you what he wants then that is a really good sign.

    My DD has Autism and does not have any social issues at all, but has some sensory issues, she is only mildly Autistic though, and boys tend to have different symptoms compared with girls.

    It can be very difficult to diagnose Autism, and there has been some changes to the diagnostic criteria lately meaning that the child needs to have a certain number of sensory and communicative issues in for a diagnosis of Autism to be made.

    There is a private diagnostic service available through ASPECT in NSW and I think it is ASPIRE in VIC (not sure of what services the other states offer) where they use the gold standard in diagnosing Autism it is called the ADOS tool and there is generally not a wait for the assessment .It is a very sensitive tool compared with the CARS that many of the public systems use. The only down side is that the ADOS is quite expensive, it cost us 1200 and we claimed 300 back through medicare. But I had my son assessed through ADOS and he did not have Autism.

    Try not to worry yourself too much, kids can have lots of things that appear to be Autistic behaviours but it doesn't mean they are on the spectrum. However in saying that early intervention is key and having him assessed is the right thing to do either way. In the interim, you could try to arrange some speech and occupational therapy sessions to help you better understand what might assist him developmentally. From what you wrote above, he doesn't sound too different to my almost 3 yr old son, and as I said he is not Autistic, but of course all kids are different and really only a trained professional can give you the answer to that question.

    Good luck with it all, but I would definitely be seeking the help of an occupational therapist and speech therapist in the interim - you may be entitled to this through your local public hospital if you participate in a multidisciplinary assessment there which is what i did with my daughter before she had her CATS assessment where she was given her Autism diagnosis.

    Good luck with it all.

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  12. #7
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    Thank you everyone for your responses. It is such a relief to hear that there are others out there with children doing similar things. The waiting game is very hard to get through, and I have found comfort in reading your stories. I am not afraid of a diagnosis of ASD. It won't change who our little boy is. It's just the waiting and unknowing that has me frustrated and down. Some days I feel strong, exuberant, and ready for whatever may come, and other days are very dark and sad. Yet he is still the same, and he's happy, so why shouldn't I be? His words are garbled and with most he can only say half of the word. I should have made it clear before that he isn't speaking perfectly clearly. But to me that's speaking. He does see a speech therapist and I think it is helping a great deal, especially me and how I can encourage interactions with him. Thank you all again for your input, it has made me feel much better! And not so alone.

  13. #8
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    Just an update: my son has been diagnosed as being on the spectrum. He was diagnosed last week. It some ways it has brought relief! Now we have a direction & goals. And the hunt begins for therapists and funding. Yikes! I wanted to thank everyone here again for your encouraging words! And I am interested in hearing how your LO's are getting on.

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  15. #9
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    Thanks for the update op. Good luck with finding everything you need.

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    I posted earlier in this thread, and my DS also ended up being diagnosed with ASD. At the time I posted we were still a bit 'is he on the spectrum or isn't he?', but now at almost 4 it is pretty obvious he is different from a neurotypical child of his age.

    We have been accepted onto the NDIS and I'm waiting for a planner to call so we can meet and get the ball rolling with all the funding/therapies. I've been told there's a delay and I probably won't hear until late this month.

    I'm looking forward to getting all the therapies rolled out. DS starts preschool at the end of the month (1 day a week) and we have also applied to get him into an early intervention program run by a local primary school. Should be a big year for him and for us!

    Thanks for updating OP


 

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