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  1. #1
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    Default Telling off a disabled person

    I took DS to the bike track that has "road rules" at one of the local parks the other day and there is a girl who would be in her 20's in an electric wheelchair that is quite often there and she drives herself around the track but on this occasion she seemed to be causing confusion and stack ups by going the wrong way around. DS being only 2 does goes the wrong way sometimes on his scooter and he crossed her path making her stop. I apologised to her explaining that he is still learning the rules and she said that was ok, she understood and I moved DS to another part of the track. Then this parent went over to her and says to her in a quite aggressive manner and loud enough for everyone at the track to hear that if she looks at the sign she could see that it says "one way" and she was going the wrong way and if she went the right way the kids would stop having accidents. While this is true her manner was quite aggressive. I think this parent had already had a go at her before I got there as well. The girl got all confused trying to turn around and then rode off in tears. I felt so bad for her. I didn't quite know what to do. I didn't want to start an argument with the parent while DS was there and the girl had already gone off and did not come back. What would you do?

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    That is so sad. What I would want to do and what I would actually do are probably 2 different things. What I would want to do would be to step in and go to the aide of the disabled girl. While I agree with the message, there's a nice way of going about it and there's just being mean and nasty. What I would actually do would probably be look the other way because I'm too chicken to cause or be involved in a confrontation.

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    Oh that is so mean. It was obviously an honest mistake. If you saw her there again I would say something to her like
    'Just ignore that man. You didn't mean it and I hope you'll stay and play here on the track with us'.

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    WiseOldOwl  (22-05-2014)

  6. #4
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    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
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    so sad, the poor girl has this outing for some entertainment and some learning for her, and she gets abused for making mistakes. I would be just watching out for her the next time she comes and be welcoming to her. some people just cant see past their own noses and anything that causes them an inconvience is simply not allowed. marie

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    I'd probably quietly let her know that she was meant to be going a different way. Certainly not aggressive or demeaning.

    The way that person handled it was horrible. I hope they realised it.

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    WiseOldOwl  (22-05-2014)

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    Well I think the way they went about it was completely rude and uncalled for but... She was going the wrong way. Someone should have told her earlier that she was going the wrong way. It's a tough call and probably needs to be case by case, but it *can* be just as discriminatory to make special allowances for people with a disability. I don't think it's right to just let her go the wrong way and let accidents happen. And if someone explains it nicely and she still doesn't get it, or gets upset then that's sort of too bad IMO. I hope I don't get flamed for that, and it makes sense. I'm just saying that someone should have been helping her figure out the rules, instead of just letting her carry on.
    Does she have a carer that you know of, OP? Sounds like she's a bit of a regular at the track. Someone needs to figure out a way to teach her the right way to go so she can continue riding there without causing accidents and angst!

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    Intellectually disabled or physically disabled?

    Agree that the person went the wrong way about it, but if she is intellectually disabled and intellectually/mentally similar to a child then she should be guided and supervised in the correct way to use the public facilities in the same way you would guide and supervise your children.

    She doesn't get to do what she wants just because she's in a wheelchair just as your son doesn't get to do what he wants just because he's 2.

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    I agree, while it sounds like this person went about it the wrong way the message (to do the right thing) was right.

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    WiseOldOwl  (22-05-2014)

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    From what I can tell it seems to be a physical disability as she speaks and understands things well. I have never seen a carer there with her but she would need to have some form of transport to get there so maybe they stay in another area of the park while she uses the track, it is a massive park. I agree that maybe someone needed to let her know that she was causing problems by not following the signs but the way this woman went about it was horrible. And I mean she is not the only one that doesn't follow the "road rules" . A lot of parents just sit and not pay attention to what their kids are doing so it was a bit harsh to single her out.


 

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