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  1. #11
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    Our court order states that daily contact be arranged with the other parent in the case of an out of state or overseas trip. So clearly the family court thinks that's reasonable; I can't see why it wouldn't be thought of the same way for a private agreement.

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    Actual location is kind of irrelevant really, they're still overseas.
    I don't think it's irrelevant. I think such young children would cope better with a shorter plane trip, especially being away from their primary caregiver.

    Anyway, if I was in your situation OP I wouldn't be letting my kids go. What do you think your ex would do if the shoe was on the other foot.

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    Actual location is kind of irrelevant really, they're still overseas.
    I dunno, the time taken to get there or back in an emergency is pretty different.
    Personally I think 2 or 3 is too young for that kind of trip. But I haven't been in this situation so feel free to completely disregard this post!
    Good luck, it doesn't sound like an easy choice.

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    I have daily contact with her when she stays with X for the weekend so i wouldn't want anything less if she is overseas.

    X can also call her daily if he so wishes

  5. #15
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    I worked in family law for many years and can confirm that our orders always included, but no limited to, flight details (including copies of return tickets), hotels and contact details and an itinerary. For children so young I don't believe this is too much information to request at all. As long as he provides the above details and you trust him with the children then what a great experience for them! If he was to fail to return with the children you would be able to seek a recovery order from the courts to have the children returned so there is that safety net on the very rare chance that is what he is doing.

  6. #16
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    Two of mine and ex children went overseas to Europe with their fathers family, aged 5 and 8. Youngest of our children was only 2 at the time so he knew.that she wasn't going to be ok to go too.
    As part of.our agreement I was provided with a detailed itinerary, all flight details, and of course daily (when possible) phone conversations.
    My kids were safe, with family, we were all confident and happy with the plans, and while we did miss each other (moreso me of course) they had an amazing holiday they will never forget.


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  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by btmac View Post
    I think there are are a lot of unknowns in your OP that would affect my answer.

    How often do they see their dad now?
    Do they already go to him for extended periods - like 2 weeks at a time?
    Is there any risk he would not return with them?
    Will he ensure you have consistent phone/skype contact with them?
    What is their relationship like with the new partner? The other kids?

    Personally I would not be letting them go but that is based on personal experience and my own baggage.

    Your situation may be very different.
    I think your younger children are far too young for this kind of trip and time away from you OP but as btmac says it depends what your current arrangement is.

    Good luck to them with 5 very young kids on such a huge journey!

    I completely understand you being terribly nervous about this. Don't be afraid to speak up and assert your worries and opinions.

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  10. #18
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    hi

    thank u so much for all you replies

    they have never been away from me for longer than two nights which is our arrangement every 2 weeks

    so hard cos I like to 'try and keep things amicable

  11. #19
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    If they have only been away for 2 nights at a time then I think this would be a bit too much for the little one's.

  12. #20
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    Perhaps negotiate that the 5 year old can go, but not the 2 and 3 year old.


 

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