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  1. #1
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    Default 30, TTC #1 for 15 months

    Hello everybody.

    Well, I never thought I'd see the day I'd be joining a baby forum, but here I am. TTC! (The fact I even know most of the acronyms now would be quite funny to anybody who knew me)

    I guess I now just want to be around others who are going through
    the same month to month feelings I am?

    A bit of background on me - I'm 31 this year, I've technically been TTC for 15 months now (that is, not so actively trying other than letting it happen if it happened) with the occasional input of a cycle tracker app (tracking periods not ovulation! I'm quite ashamed to say that I realise now I was clueless about when I was supposed to be chasing the egg so I am hoping that has been the problem here.)


    THus, I have began to track ovulation in the last month (OPK & CM, & I am going to start temping also) and will give myself another few months of trying at these optimum times before fertility testing around August-SEp. I know everybody says check after 1 year but I feel I have only had one real go on the board, with maybe an odd chance here and there.



    Before starting TTC I wouldn't have even had an idea how long my cycle was, other then noting that it came every month. So many things about this process I was utterly clueless about. Most of all, I didn't realise how difficult it would be to fall pregnant! And then if you do fall pregnant, all the things I have read lately in just STAYING pregnant. I mean, this is hard work! I realise now that I have taken this whole thing for granted.

    Overall, I hate that it has taken me so long to "feel ready" that I now have to deal with TTC in the harder stages of the child bearing years. But nobody to blame but myself!

    My problem now is I feel this is starting to consume my life! In the fertile phase I'm doing the things I need to be doing, and then I'm waiting patiently to see if it's worked. When it doesn't I'm LISTLESS until I can start trying again. There's no symptom I haven't googled to see if this could be it, but when I'm not in the "possibility phase" and a tummy ache is just a tummy ache I'm blank and just going through the motions of my days until
    it's time to try again! Oh well, next week it starts all over again!

    Thanks for letting my ramble, I feel I've taken the first steps towards accepting that it is time to check into things further now, and I really hope to meet others who are on the same hard road!
    Last edited by happy444; 16-04-2014 at 15:10.

  2. #2
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    Welcome happy444! You'll find the Hub a great place for support and finding people who are experiencing the same things as you.

    I'm currently pregnant with my third but it took a hell of a lot of work and heartache to get here. It took us 12 months to fall with our first then nearly 2 years with our second. Sometimes it's hard to keep faith that it will happen eventually when each month brings more disappointment.

    I hope you find yourself staring at those 2 magical lines really soon

  3. #3
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    Thank you Chippa Reading through the topics, it is nice to be around others all experiencing the very same feelings I am, and to know this is a "normal" for a lot of people! Just knowing that and that people like yourself have gone on to conceive after so long makes me more positive.

    Do you mind me asking if you & your partner went to get things checked out when it was taking so long or you just trusted you felt things were working like they should and kept trying? This is what I'm struggling with right now, making myself go and do that.

    I hate reading everywhere that you should go after 1 year, I just don't feel ready to do that yet

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by happy444 View Post
    Thank you Chippa Reading through the topics, it is nice to be around others all experiencing the very same feelings I am, and to know this is a "normal" for a lot of people! Just knowing that and that people like yourself have gone on to conceive after so long makes me more positive.

    Do you mind me asking if you & your partner went to get things checked out when it was taking so long or you just trusted you felt things were working like they should and kept trying? This is what I'm struggling with right now, making myself go and do that.

    I hate reading everywhere that you should go after 1 year, I just don't feel ready to do that yet
    Don't mind at all! I sought help for my first and second after 12 months pretty much to the day lol. Without realising it I booked in to see a fertility specialist and was already pregnant with DS1! So therefore dodged a bullet.

    Second time around I sought help after a year and was given all kinds of tests by the fertility specialist for both myself and DH. This process was slow and took around 6 months (waiting for appointments results etc). After 18 months passed with no luck my FS suggested a laparoscopy to check my tubes. After this I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility as DH was fine and everything was clear on the lap. So it was a bit like um ok so what next? FS was talking about IVF. Well amazingly the lap must have given me the clean out I needed as I fell pregnant the very next cycle!! My darling DS2 is now 2 years old.

    With this one I had been breastfeeding up until DS2 weaned at 15 months and never bothered to go back on the pill as we knew we wanted another and how long it takes us to fall. Our plan was to start TTC this year and I waited for AF to arrive so we could start trying properly (we had been casual in not preventing but not actively trying). Well AF never came and I'm now 19 weeks with bubba 3! Huge huge shock after the stress of my first two.

    Sorry for the novel hopefully it helps!

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    Thank you chippa! I bit the bullet and have booked gp visit next wk. I thought I was due for pap next year but turns out it's this year, oops.

    Half the problem is that I don't have a regular GP, but I've picked out the doctor with the kindest face from the website so fingers crossed haha. Pap, blood work and will speak to her about whatever else (maybe see if she can work out if I'm ovulating?), I will still give myself another 2 cycles but feel better in knowing I'm prepared to move forward. And if I do that I'll get hubby into for his testing at his gp too.

  6. #6
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    That's great to hear happy! I hope it is a step in the right direction and you'll be a mum soon xx

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    Hey happy and welcome! I just wanted to pipe up and say hello and that your experience sounds really familiar to me. I too was so amazed at how complicated the whole process can be and how little I knew about how the biology of conception even works! To be honest, I think the education system does us a disservice in not explaining it accurately, and I'm not sure why common beliefs about how pregnancy works are so far off the mark.

    Anyway I also identify with how weird it can be when you get into all this and then imagine if your real life friends 'saw you now'! It definitely opens up a different area of life. And I also totally agree that it seems really bizarre when you consider yourself an intelligent and accomplished human being and yet for a 2-week period every month (at least!) everything is boring except pregnancy symptoms, and you are just wishing the days away until you can test.

    I can't explain why, it must be the combination of biological imperative + the fact that this process going on inside us is one that we can understand so much about and simultaneously not control. I imagine that is what makes it so all-consuming! You are definitely not alone though.

    Anyway sorry for the essay, I just really related to your first post. You should jump into the Conception & Fertility forums, we all try to help each other through the boring waiting we all have to do all the time!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chippa View Post
    That's great to hear happy! I hope it is a step in the right direction and you'll be a mum soon xx

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by elswyth View Post
    Hey happy and welcome! I just wanted to pipe up and say hello and that your experience sounds really familiar to me. I too was so amazed at how complicated the whole process can be and how little I knew about how the biology of conception even works! To be honest, I think the education system does us a disservice in not explaining it accurately, and I'm not sure why common beliefs about how pregnancy works are so far off the mark.

    Anyway I also identify with how weird it can be when you get into all this and then imagine if your real life friends 'saw you now'! It definitely opens up a different area of life. And I also totally agree that it seems really bizarre when you consider yourself an intelligent and accomplished human being and yet for a 2-week period every month (at least!) everything is boring except pregnancy symptoms, and you are just wishing the days away until you can test.

    I can't explain why, it must be the combination of biological imperative + the fact that this process going on inside us is one that we can understand so much about and simultaneously not control. I imagine that is what makes it so all-consuming! You are definitely not alone though.

    Anyway sorry for the essay, I just really related to your first post. You should jump into the Conception & Fertility forums, we all try to help each other through the boring waiting we all have to do all the time!
    Absolutely agree on the education completely lacking - all I got from sex ed was, If you don't want to risk pregnancy, don't have sex with boys!

    I'm embarrassed by my lack of knowledge of how my own body works but I've sure learnt alot recently! Isn't it an eye opener

    I've never been one to stop and ogle people's babies, I'm terrified when asked to hold one let alone have ever had one alone in my care, and I've told my mum since I can remember I'm never having a horrid kid, ever! So you could imagine the surprise if I was to tell them I am wanting and trying!!

    Isn't googling possible pregnancy symptoms fun though? What can't be attributed to a possible pregnancy symptom if it is the right timing for it? Google: I'm craving guiness alot lately.Answer: You could be pregnant and craving iron! Woohoo But its obviously been my experience that I'm craving guiness just because I want guiness! Oh well.

    I've been meaning to jump over and post on the conception forum and I will finally get around it this weekend-I will see you there!


 

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