I think i have decided to not actually tell my mum that we are getting the house on the market and plan to be moved about 40 minutes away from her by the end of the year. 40 minutes may not see that far, but in my controlling mothers world - its just as bad as moving to a different state. Especially now that we have DS and another on the way, She will see this as me tearing her grandchildren away from her. I recently had terrible trouble with a evil neighbor we have... things got so bad i had to get a intervention order on the crazy cow. When i mentioned to my mum back then that I want us to sell and move, she told me to stop being stupid. Mind you if my mother was in my position she wouldn't cope anywhere near as well as i did in it. My relationship with my mum is ****. She's manipulative, controlling, *****y. She has double standards. I am sick to death of dealing with her. She lives 5 mins away. Just how she likes it. The reason why i am questioning if i should or shouldn't tell her our plans to sell and move asap ... is because she will go off her head, it will break out into a massive fight. She will most likely use DS as a weapon to guilt trip me because she wont be able to see him as often. I am presuming this all will happen because i know exactly how she works. She only thinks about herself and screw everyone else. She knows I am miserable in the area we live, but she gets extremely angry with me when i mention i want to move. Even if i move 10 mins away from her... she gets mad. We moved to this area originally because mum said step dad and her will give us $10,000 towards our first home if we move down to their area. DH hated being told where to live, but at the time the reality was we couldn't afford anywhere else. We were living at the Inlaws house... so desperately wanted to get out of there and get our own place. But now nearly 5 years later, we have more money.... we can afford to live somewhere we choose now. Do you think it's wrong of me to plan to not tell my mum? Or after the poor treatment over the years she has no right to know? I don't want to bore you all with all the details, but she has been crap to me. So i just want to move away and start a fresh for our family. Plus it will be right near DH's work. Right now he is traveling almost an hour back and forth and he has to start at 6am. LOL once when i mentioned that to mum she said "So what, life doesn't revolve around his work" she just wants to have the last say on everything i do and i really need to break that cycle now. But because they gave us $10,000 towards this house do you think I owe it to her to let her know we're planning to move? It will mean she will work hard at trying to bully me to change my mind and then make me change DH's mind. So the reason why i wasn't going to tell her was so we could just organise it in peace. What are your thoughts?