OP I can understand how your family and in laws feel. My mother hates the fact she only sees the kids 4-6hrs on the weekend so she added a weekday visit after work so 6.30-8pm ish. Granted it's not ideal for me as I work and the kids need their bedtime but she really does adore the kids. So we have a deal. She comes and does bath/books/bedtime stories whilst I get the evening to catch up on housework.
When my dad visits I do the groceries or cooking for the week.
Make the visits work for you.
On an aside. I visit my grandparents every week after bath when the kids are in pjs. We go over for an hour or so. They would be devastated if we didn't visit weekly.
wifey of hubby who is always away. mother of two girls who are always amusing.