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  1. #21
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    I probably see my parent 1-2 times a week (through the week or on the weekend) but if we are super busy there are certainly the odd weeks where I won't see them.

    My IL's we see 1-2 times a week also, although usually once on the weekend as they work and also live further away. Again though, there may be the odd week where we don't see them at all.

    We try to keep if fair but in the end our own family time must come first, it's very important. I think both sets of grandparents understand this.

  2. #22
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    Thanks everyone - with hubby only having one day off a week it's hard. We get no time together as like I said we only go to visit grandparents.

    Even if they came to see is it would still be the same amount of time. DS is only awake for 3 hours. Also if they came during the week they would still expect to see him on the weekend. There is no compromising with him. I think the amount of time is fine. I love that They love him but they are suffocating. If my son even reaches out to me while we are their they tare him away. If we are at any family gatherings he follows me around and I can't enjoy my DS as he is taken away from me.
    I can't remember who asked but no I will not be getting an apology i don't think this man has ever apologised in his life. And I don't want to entertain at home. We can't afford to be feeding them meals every week and have enough for lunch the next day and I don't want the mess.
    It's a losing battle and one they will lose as if he treats me like he does the time will not increase it will be decreasing.

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  4. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by maco View Post
    Even if they came to see is it would still be the same amount of time. DS is only awake for 3 hours. Also if they came during the week they would still expect to see him on the weekend. There is no compromising with him. I think the amount of time is fine. I love that They love him but they are suffocating. If my son even reaches out to me while we are their they tare him away. If we are at any family gatherings he follows me around and I can't enjoy my DS as he is taken away from me.
    I can't remember who asked but no I will not be getting an apology i don't think this man has ever apologised in his life. And I don't want to entertain at home. We can't afford to be feeding them meals every week and have enough for lunch the next day and I don't want the mess.
    It's a losing battle and one they will lose as if he treats me like he does the time will not increase it will be decreasing.
    Fair enough. What does your DH say? I hope he is supporting you! Good on you for standing up for yourself and your family!

  5. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by bpac View Post
    Fair enough. What does your DH say? I hope he is supporting you! Good on you for standing up for yourself and your family!

    My husband thinks the same as me. Their is no more time!! He just needs to work on being assertive as I'm getting tired of always being the one at the front getting blamed and yelled at.

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  7. #25
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    Like many others, we don't have any grandparents nearby so we have never had a problem like this.. But can you set a firm rule of every other weekend visiting the grandparents then the alternating week meet somewhere (during the week on your own)neutral like a park or playground (so you're not obligated to feed or clean up after them) it sounds like you need to put ur foot down. If you show you're willing to compromise then they will have to as well. It's totally unreasonable for them to expect you to spend every Sunday running from place to place. You need your own family time too. They have to respect your wishes. Also I'd get dh to tell them! In our house dh deals with tricky stuff with his parents and vice versa.

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    babyla  (07-04-2014)

  9. #26
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    I have some pretty strict boundaries around our family time together - it's ours. If during that time (usually a Sunday too as DH mainly works 6 days a week) there is a family do or MIL has requested to come up we negotiate. We both work full time and my sanity literally banks on me enforcing family time for DH, DS and myself. In saying that though, my parents take DS on a Friday anyway so they get to enjoy time with him regularly and MIL sees him every 6/8 weeks. FIL has met him 3 times.

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    VicPark  (07-04-2014)

  11. #27
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    My parents live down the street! I think 5 days is the longest mums not seen DS! ( and that's when we went away)
    But they/we are really close , he has sleep overs once a month and she minds him when I'm at work plus we have family night dinner once a week , DH parents are 3 hours away and we see them about once a month for a weekend but they call every couple of days - can you take him to see his grandparents during the week or can they come to you? Or try family dinner during the week?

  12. #28
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    We see my parents about once a week, the ILs maybe 3-4 times a year!

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    Honestly. .. that's completely unrealistic. The only day you have together is always spent with them? Your DH really needs to talk to them that you guys are your own family now too and you need to spend time alone together.
    I would be aiming for once a month based on your work schedules plus maybe an evening for early dinner or something if that works.
    What a tough situation. Try to remember that your first priority is to your husband and kids... Not them. And hubby needs to realise that too.

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  15. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tamtam View Post
    Honestly. .. that's completely unrealistic. The only day you have together is always spent with them? Your DH really needs to talk to them that you guys are your own family now too and you need to spend time alone together.
    I would be aiming for once a month based on your work schedules plus maybe an evening for early dinner or something if that works.
    What a tough situation. Try to remember that your first priority is to your husband and kids... Not them. And hubby needs to realise that too.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

    Exactly all of this.

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