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  1. #11
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    Oh I missed the working away part. Yea bugger that. You have enough on your plate!

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  2. #12
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    thanks for your opinions! I just find it so frustrating I am not in the slightest part lazy, My house looks like a show home and he always has dinner cooked for him when he is home hes also extremely fussy, he will no eat casseroles or meat with a bone. He will only eat iceberg lettuce. No peas, corn, pumpkin, celery, cauliflower, onions, avocado, eggplant, pasta and he only eats a certain brand of mayo haha.


    I find it really insulting that he earns over 200,000 and expects me to work, seriously!!!

  3. #13
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    Why does he care if he's never at home ?? I'd tell him to bugger off !

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    waitsee  (02-04-2014)

  5. #14
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    I'm lucky with my DH in the sense that he's never pressured me to go back to work. DS1 was almost 2 (1yr 9 months) before I went back to work part time (1-2 days per week)

    He makes JUST enough to cover mortgage and pay bills and good etc but has never put pressure on me thankfully.

    When I went back to work, it was mainly because we were planning DS2 and knew we would need some extra money, plus we sold our unit and bought a house, so the extra money helped with that for a while. Most importantly, it was BOTH our decisions.

    DH has always said that he wants US to look after our kids, although DS1 is in daycare 2 days a week, that's more for socialization etc.

    I said to DH that I may go back earlier 2n time around, maybe when DS2 tuns 1, but DH didn't like that idea.

    I can see why you are upset. I would be too! Could you compromise and stay home for another day, 8-12 months and then go back part time?

    Does your MIL want to look after your baby?



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  6. #15
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    she wants to look after the baby, but she is not a nice person and i have only ever let her have the children for 2 hours max, might i add that this was because we had a funeral to go to and 2 hours later i got a text message saying we had to return because DD2 had soiled her diaper and she didnt want to change it................. says it all huh

  7. #16
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    Not once in 20 years. He wants me to be home. Even after the last one goes to school.

  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshorewife View Post
    thanks for your opinions! I just find it so frustrating I am not in the slightest part lazy, My house looks like a show home and he always has dinner cooked for him when he is home hes also extremely fussy, he will no eat casseroles or meat with a bone. He will only eat iceberg lettuce. No peas, corn, pumpkin, celery, cauliflower, onions, avocado, eggplant, pasta and he only eats a certain brand of mayo haha.


    I find it really insulting that he earns over 200,000 and expects me to work, seriously!!!
    You sound like a great wife and mum....he sounds like an a$$. Maybe next time he's due home...do nothing and say that you are just preparing him for what the house will be like if you work too!

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    Jontu  (05-04-2014)

  10. #18
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    This was an email i just received from him. I think im going to pack my belongings!!!!

    Look up house wife in the dictionary - if you want to be one and live by the rules the man makes the money fine - I expect a hot cooked meal every night as well as breakfast and lunch, the house to be cleaned daily, my clothes to be washed folded and ironed and put away. you to **** and suck me like a "house wife" should if you can't do that then clearly your not a "house wife" and clearly I shouldn't be the only bread winner.

  11. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Offshorewife View Post
    she wants to look after the baby, but she is not a nice person and i have only ever let her have the children for 2 hours max, might i add that this was because we had a funeral to go to and 2 hours later i got a text message saying we had to return because DD2 had soiled her diaper and she didnt want to change it................. says it all huh
    Ok, I'm all for family, but of she won't change a nappy she can't babysit!

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    FrothyFrog  (02-04-2014),ozeymumof5  (02-04-2014),waitsee  (02-04-2014)

  13. #20
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    Not having a go OP, but do you think your husband might be resenting you for staying at home?
    In his mind he might feel as though he is working heaps, and working away, and you just stay at home and "not do to much" (I'm a stay at home mum so know that isn't true) but could this be what he is thinking?

    I had an operation 2 years ago and was told I couldn't have more children, so for me staying at home with my 3 year old is a priority, she will be my only child and under no circumstances am I missing a second!
    In the beginning my dh was a bit funny about it, after having a big talk with him he told me he felt like it wasn't fair that he had to go out and work whilst I just stayed home everyday, it wasn't how hard my work would be at home to him, but more the fact that I had a bit more flexibility and got to spend all day with dd, I really did understand where he was coming from, because if he was a stay at home dad, I would be jealous!!

    It's fine now, we have been in a bit of financial trouble a few times, big bills come in that we didn't expect etc, but we have both made sacrifices and dh hasn't ever said I should return to work as he now knows how important this time with dd is to me and how much of a full time job it is to look after children full time.

    I don't think your husband is being a douche bag, but more he just doesn't understand and might be feeling frustration over you having stability in being a stay at home mum, but he has to be away from the family, work long weeks etc. perhaps he just doesn't understand the work of what being at home involves.
    Perhaps just try having a big talk with him and find out why he thinks your "lazy" and try to see it from his point of view before placing him in the douche bag box


 

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