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  1. #601
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    I have to admit I'm in the shower with my poor phone I have a glycolic mask on my face and a cup of tea this is my only place I can relax without the kids haha

  2. #602
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    @Oliveaux - sorry to hear. Did they tell you if you had any HCG in your system, so just said no because there was a tiny amount below 5?

    FWIW, I don't actively check for CM, but this cycle of OI had a glob of EWCM when I wiped and ovulated 4 days after that.

  3. #603
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    @Shrillian, none at all I'm so upset with DP for being so uncaring and upset with myself cos it actually occurred to me to try last night just in case since I had a lot of EWCM and of course today, ovulation pain but my good mucus is all gone. We DTD anyway (well, not exactly, i wont get too technical but my partner is a trans lady so we don't always babydance when we're TTC cos they sometimes have trouble with producing the goodies), it's probably impossible without EWCM but I figure if I've just ovulated today and it takes the little buggers 15 mins to reach my tubes, if they can just get through this dodgy mucous we might still be in the game. Tell you what though, I learned so much about my body this cycle and also some pretty bad things about my relationship. The only reason i'm still trying to TTC with DP is that I've been a single parent for years before meeting them, I had two in nappies when DD2 was born so I can take care of baby myself even if they're going to keep being dickish. Ugh sorry for all the negativity and taking up so much space on this thread, my heart goes out to everyone here. I had no idea how hard this was emotionally, I can't imagine going through this for several months or years, dealing with infertility etc. You're all incredibly strong people and those of you who are TTC for #1 are going to be amazing mothers, and no doubt those of you who already have children already are. What an incredible bunch of people you all are going through this and still trying, being positive etc. Bless you all

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    Shrillian  (10-05-2014)

  5. #604
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oliveaux View Post
    @Shrillian, none at all I'm so upset with DP for being so uncaring and upset with myself cos it actually occurred to me to try last night just in case since I had a lot of EWCM and of course today, ovulation pain but my good mucus is all gone. We DTD anyway (well, not exactly, i wont get too technical but my partner is a trans lady so we don't always babydance when we're TTC cos they sometimes have trouble with producing the goodies), it's probably impossible without EWCM but I figure if I've just ovulated today and it takes the little buggers 15 mins to reach my tubes, if they can just get through this dodgy mucous we might still be in the game. Tell you what though, I learned so much about my body this cycle and also some pretty bad things about my relationship. The only reason i'm still trying to TTC with DP is that I've been a single parent for years before meeting them, I had two in nappies when DD2 was born so I can take care of baby myself even if they're going to keep being dickish. Ugh sorry for all the negativity and taking up so much space on this thread, my heart goes out to everyone here. I had no idea how hard this was emotionally, I can't imagine going through this for several months or years, dealing with infertility etc. You're all incredibly strong people and those of you who are TTC for #1 are going to be amazing mothers, and no doubt those of you who already have children already are. What an incredible bunch of people you all are going through this and still trying, being positive etc. Bless you all
    Oliveaux I am so sorry for all that you are going through. YOU are a great mum and you don't deserve to be going through this. None of us do.

    Maybe wait until things are more settled and have a proper chat with your partner about what you need and expect from them.

    Fx for a bub for this month but I hope even more that you can get the support you need as you'll need it for pregnancy and to raise the kid.

    Will be thinking of you tonight and hope you feel better

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    Oliveaux  (09-05-2014)

  7. #605
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    thank you
    I know I have no basis to get upset, it was our first cycle properly trying to TTC and I have two beautiful babies who were both joyful surprises. I think the shared custody arrangement is doing my head in, I want them with me all the time not part time but I can't have that, and combined with just other stuff going on in my life it all caught up with me at once. Mostly I'm upset with my partner honestly. It's never about the can opener really is it? I think TTC brought up a lot of stuff I haven't dealt with and stuff between my partner and I. In truth, a BFN on first try is to be expected and nothing to be upset about, and I'm already feeling better it was just a bit of a shock I guess.
    My partner did explain to me why they abandoned me today; they went to the supermarket and a group of men were talking about raping and murdering Laverne Cox (a prominent trans woman activist and actress) and it made my partner feel really scared cos they're a trans woman too, which honestly is completely understandable, who wouldn't be scared in their position, but it also feels like an excuse because they have valium for their panic attacks and it's not like this just happened today, it's been happening the entire time.

    Still, we DTD today which means testing day is the 23rd, so we're not out of this month yet. I'm armed with a lot more information and understanding of my body for the future and I've learned a valuable lesson; never use FRER!
    Thanks so much for your support This really is a wonderful community.

    I'm sorry for everyone who got AF over the last few days and to the remaining weekend testers!

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    AislasMummy  (09-05-2014),Bellefirexxx  (09-05-2014)

  9. #606
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    @Oliveaux don't be sorry for feeling this way. Every cycle is hard and this one must have been torture with the false positives. Partner's no matter what gender never really understand. I don't even talk to DH about it anymore other than to tell him when his little men are needed.

    When I told DH I was pg last time he was so matter of fact and said that we shouldn't get excited until after 12 weeks so when I mc I felt like I had been ridiculous for already considering it a baby. Going to keep it to myself for a while next time.

    Although I doubt I'll ever get ku with him getting drunk once a week. When I asked him to cut out booze for a while, he made a joke about how do people get pregnant on drunken one night stands.

    Honestly people can be assholes sometimes and insensitive but 99.9% of the time he's an amazing dad and partner.

    Guess we all have issues to work out.

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    Oliveaux  (09-05-2014)

  11. #607
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bellefire View Post
    I know its hard, and everything seems to come out all at once. We are all here for each other - the good, the bad, and the tmi! (I wouldn't talk about CM anywhere else!).

    And honestly, it doesn't matter how long any of us has been ttc - 1 month or 12 months - it is still a let down and a heart breaker.

    (/'^')/ \('~'\) \('o')/ - need a cheer squad to get me through this TTC journey!
    You mean egg white cervical mucus and baby dancing aren't appropriate things for general conversation. I kept wondering why the man in the convenience store was getting so uncomfortable when he asked how I was 😉

    Love having you ladies to chat to xxx

  12. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Lolamc For This Useful Post:

    AislasMummy  (09-05-2014),Bellefirexxx  (09-05-2014),JessiW  (10-05-2014),MrsTugs  (10-05-2014)

  13. #608
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oliveaux View Post
    well, it was negative. I am never buyer FRER again and I'm making a complaint to the company. I am so devastated I'm crying, I was so sure. My partner isn't even here cos they went out then came home and went straight into the shower without even speaking to me, they've been so unsupportive through this whole ordeal i dont even know if i want to TTC anymore with them honestly. I was so sure you know?? I'll never be sure of anything again i dont think
    Oh no @Oliveaux I'm so sorry for getting your hopes up. I hope you feel a bit brighter in the morning x

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    Oliveaux  (09-05-2014)

  15. #609
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lolamc View Post
    @Oliveaux don't be sorry for feeling this way. Every cycle is hard and this one must have been torture with the false positives. Partner's no matter what gender never really understand. I don't even talk to DH about it anymore other than to tell him when his little men are needed.

    When I told DH I was pg last time he was so matter of fact and said that we shouldn't get excited until after 12 weeks so when I mc I felt like I had been ridiculous for already considering it a baby. Going to keep it to myself for a while next time.

    Although I doubt I'll ever get ku with him getting drunk once a week. When I asked him to cut out booze for a while, he made a joke about how do people get pregnant on drunken one night stands.

    Honestly people can be assholes sometimes and insensitive but 99.9% of the time he's an amazing dad and partner.

    Guess we all have issues to work out.
    thank you and sorry about the issues you're having with DH. I think you're right, if it's not your body and you've never been through it you can't possibly understand. My partner is the same, they can't work out why the 2WW drives me crazy, why the negative test was such a big deal (after the false positives especially it was devastating, and they kept saying "look there's the line, you're pregnant"), any of it really. They're a great parent to my two girls (from a previous relationship, ex P became very violent and involved in drug manufacture, gangs etc so after many years of trying to make it work and change him I had to leave) and I have no doubt they will be a great parent to our bub someday.
    During my first pregnancy, my mother said "you become a mother as soon as you find out you're pregnant, a father doesn't become a dad until the baby is born" and i think that's very true. I really hope you get your BFP, i don't know much about male fertility but hopefully one night a week of getting drunk wouldn't be that detrimental? I wish he would stop for you though or at least cut back. My family drinks non-alcoholic beer and it tastes just the same but that's probably not the reason he's drinking I suppose.

  16. #610
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    Thanks @Oliveaux. Sorry I made your heartbreak into a whinge about me. I guess I just wanted you to know no one is perfect.

    Maybe June will be the month for us both. I am still holding out a sliver of hope for may, but not much more.


 

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