DH and I have just had a huge fight about going away with his family over Xmas! First of all, I have had major issues with my MIL when we got married, I can never forgive her for what she has done and It took DH and I over 12 months to speak to her after our wedding. About a year ago I had it out with her and since then things have been polite and ok but to be honest I hate being left alone with her because it's such an effort for me and I just try and talk about neutral topics. we see her maybe once a week to once a fortnight and I just keep the peace but trust me I only do it for DH's sake! Well I'm currently 6 months pregnant and we are expecting a little boy in June. Anyway DH is also very close with his grand parents and they rang us today and I could here him saying we would be interested in going away with them and his mother and partner, he said yes and I tapped his arm and then he said I just need to speak with the wife first.
He got of the phone and they want to go for 2 weeks over Xmas and New Years. I said I didn't want to for a couple of reasons.
-It's our first Xmas as a family and I want to do it on our terms not someone else's.
- I don't think I could handle his mother for 2 weeks, there won't be any of DH's siblings there which is normally how I get through the family gatherings.
-We haven't had bubs yet, I have no idea how I'm going to feel about travelling and what he is going to be like.
And the last one ( I feel bad thinking this and couldn't say this to DH yet) why should my MIL get to spend our baby's first Xmas with us over my mum and other family who have always been there for us. To be honest this is probably the biggest one for me, my MIL always wants to be the most important person or first to know things so she can rub it in other people face and I feel she we be gloating about the fact she is spending Xmas with our bub and no one else gets to.
I told DH that I could probably bear a week either before or after Xmas but not over Xmas but he is being unreasonable and just says am I going to hold a grudge forever.... I don't honestly know!