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  1. #1
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    Default Feeling Sad & Alone :(

    I apologise in advance for this little rant but I have to get it off my chest.
    I'm a single mum of two, ds is 4, dd is 10wks and I feel like such a failure they have different dads ds sees his dad regularly where dd's dad has nothing to do with her. I had only two friends, both male one is gay and we have been best friends since we were 13 I'm 23 now but 4 months ago he stopped all contact with me I'd text him and stuff and he would say how much he missed me and couldn't wait for me to have dd so he could buy her stuff etc then every time we would arrange to meet up I wouldn't hear from him, I didn't even get a congratulations msg when I had dd just a simple 'like' on my facebook post male friend number two was a friend after my sister tried setting us up back in 2011, we decided we would be much better as friends and we were quite good friends we would meet up for lunch at least twice a week and catch up on weekends ds loved spending time with him but after I found out I was pregnant and he found a gf I didn't hear from him either.

    So now I feel so isolated I only leave the house to take ds to school, go shopping, visit family or go to the park. I'm hopeless at making new friends as I'm so shy when dropping ds off at school I pretty much avoid the other Mums cuz I swear ppl look down at me or something.

    There really is no point to this post just that I'm over being so alone. I appreciate my beautiful kids I really do but it would be nice to have adult friends to talk to etc.

    if you managed to read this far I want to say thank you lol

    Sent from my HTC_0P6A1

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    MrsJoey  (06-03-2014)

  3. #2
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    Ah it's a horrible feeling to be so alone. But hey- talk to people. You'd be surprised how supportive they can be, even total strangers.

    I used to be the same as you, thinking other mums looked down on me etc (I live in a fairly middle class area, where the majority are 35+ - I had my son at 21)- but that was MY issue, not theirs. I have now found a great well of support where previously I believed there was none- I'd just talk to people as though everything was completely normal, and they would respond the same way. Hey presto: respect.

    It's hard when you feel down on yourself, but "fake it til you make it". The reality is that friends won't come knocking on your door- you have to make an effort. If those you approach aren't willing to meet you halfway, move on.

    Can you get the younger kid in daycare in the next few months and maybe get a part time job? That's positively been my saviour as a single parent. It helps in soooo many ways, not the least of them social.

    But I do know how it is to feel that you have virtually no friends, I hope this changes for you very soon.

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    BandE0913  (03-03-2014)

  5. #3
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    Have you also tried mothers groups or have you tried the website meetup? it's horrible to be lonely.

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    BandE0913  (03-03-2014)

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    The suggestions from others are great and worth following up. Loneliness is awful. I don't know where you are but you might like to find a walking group for mums which would get you out, enable you to take your youngest and do an activity whilst you talk to others. I know Relationships Australia set these up in some areas in NSW so they may be in other areas too. Meet up as Sunnyflower said is a good way of meeting other single parents. The kids do most of the interacting at first and it's a gentle way of meeting others without pressure. I agree in that sometimes school parents can be judgemental but they may also be thinking 'wow, she has a new baby, wish I could take a closer look/ that mum doesn't say anything to us, I wonder why?/ who is that person?' If you can just manage a smile and a hello to one of those mums then things may be different. Good luck- single motherhood is hard but being lonely makes it tougher.

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    BandE0913  (03-03-2014)

  9. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by sunnyflower View Post
    Have you also tried mothers groups or have you tried the website meetup? it's horrible to be lonely.
    I've never heard of the website meetup before, I'm in Tas ill defiantly try all those suggestions. Thank you for your kind replies I know its probably a sooky thing to rant about and people are going thru a lot worse but it just gets me thinking lol

    Oh and I just found out the second friend is going to be a daddy by reading a status on Facebook, that stings a little cuz I knew how much he wanted a child and we used to he so close and if it was a few months ago I wouldve been one of the first people he would tell

    Sent from my HTC_0P6A1

  10. #6
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    Where in tas are you? If you live south I'd be happy for a meet up somewhere?

  11. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by AppleIsleSMum View Post
    Where in tas are you? If you live south I'd be happy for a meet up somewhere?
    I live near Hobart

    Sent from my HTC_0P6A1

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    AppleIsleSMum  (07-03-2014)

  13. #8
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    I can't inbox you as I think you need to post 10 times to activate private messaging, but I live in moonah, and have a 6 year old step daughter & a 20mth old daughter
    If you post a bit more ill inbox you

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    BandE0913  (07-03-2014)

  15. #9
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    Is posting classed as replying to threads or do I have to start my own? Lol

    Sent from my HTC_0P6A1

  16. #10
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    Just replying is enough lol
    So only 6 more replies to go
    Last edited by AppleIsleSMum; 07-03-2014 at 13:15.


 

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