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  1. #11
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    Firstly, I just want to say that you are awesome! We deal with a BM who is the opposite of you, she does all she can to stop my SO from being a part of things like this, he has had to put it specifically in the CO stating that events that fall on his time are HIS!

    He loves getting SD ready (well, watching me get her ready, but he helps pick the outfit lol), he loves dropping her off and picking her up, her excitement makes him happy.

    Maybe offer to do all pick up/drop offs and buy present, offer him make up time (exchange pick up few hours earlier etc).

    At the end of the day, you can't make the ex do certain things during his time, which seriously seriously sucks! But I guess (if you keep all communications) if he ever tries to go for more custody (never know) you'd be able to show the court how he is not very supportive of your DS's social development etc

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    AngelicHobgoblin  (26-02-2014)

  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by MamaDuck View Post

    But I guess (if you keep all communications) if he ever tries to go for more custody (never know) you'd be able to show the court how he is not very supportive of your DS's social development etc
    This. If he refuses each time make a note of it (keep texts), and if he does ever dispute with you re custody it doesn't look good re thinking about what is in the 'best interests' of the child.

    I'd offer to pick them up and take them myself, and drop them back after, but I'd still keep a record of it. And that's not practical for a lot of people, but DS loves parties and so I try to take him each time.

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    AngelicHobgoblin  (26-02-2014)

  5. #13
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    Usually, i have to go and get DS from ex...take him to the party...then take him back to ex.

    Ex agrees that it is important...but is always too busy to take him. Always takes his other kids though...and if he has DS he makes him sit and watch the party

    Anyway, if DS has a few things on the weekend ex is supposed to see him, we reschedule the weekend.

    As kids get older it becomes even more important to have a good friend network. DS is 9 and the change in the way his friendships work is already becoming clear. I hope your ex removes head from bottom soon.

  6. #14
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    I would understand that he wouldn't take them if it were my friends and I know he doesn't know it but they aren't. My friends check with me first before they say what day to make sure I have the kids and if it isn't my weekend they change it to the weekend I have them if they can. Which is awesome for them to do that for me only. You are right in saying its important for the kids and its their best interest but think its too late for it now I have no idea where he lives so don't think I could even offer to take ds

  7. #15
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    My ex either doesn't have that particular child.for that day/night depending on time, or he takes them and picks them up afterwards. I still have to buy the present and organise everything though.
    Both of us are supportive of their social calendar and even though it can be annoying, the kids don't miss out on parties. Well, not all parties anyway.

    Sent from my C6603 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  8. #16
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    Mine is actually very good with parties.. Both exes agree that it's very important and so make every effort to get them there. I do the presents and send clothes as the dads are clueless with that

  9. #17
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    if I knew it was going to be such a big deal I would of put it in the agreement lol

  10. #18
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    DD1's dad took her to 3/4 parties last year that fell on his weekends which was great as he lives 2.5hrs away so meant he came up & stayed at a caravan park near us those weekends.

    DD1 was not taking no for an answer

  11. #19
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    It's too hard for my ex to take our sons to a birthday party so I usually organise to take them and if it's meant to be his time with them I drop them off with him afterwards. It's in our parenting plan that if it falls in his time he is meant to take them but he doesn't want to so to stop them from missing out I just take them and drop them off to him later than usual. It's the only way they would get to go because he refuses to take them!!!!!


 

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