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  1. #501
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    Hi all!
    Been away for awhile, but just read the past 7 pages!! So much has been happening!
    My goodness, what incredibly gorgeous babies! And growing up so fast! Hope this doesn't sound weird Rainbow, but I remember the photo you posted of Toby when was just 'cells'!
    J - I hope your treatment is helping you. I recently had to start expressing more and I found taking some lactation tablets from a health store has defitinely boosted my supply! The mixture is Blessed Thistle and Fenugreek.

    Chelsea and I are doing ok. She will be 9 months next week and has been crawling around for about a month and a half and has been pulling herself up on furniture for about 2 weeks. I am so over the moon that she is crawling as she is 10.2 kgs! Freaking heavy!!!
    I also, have not been coping a week before Mother's Day I actually lost the plot and had a big melt down. DH sent me off to a hotel for a night to get some sleep and my sh!t together!! Since Xmas Chelsea's sleep has been getting worse, but about 3 months she would wake every 45 mins/1.5 hours and the longest she would last would be 2 hours every now and then :/ her day naps would be lucky to be 20 mins. She was such a cranky monkey and with no family here and DH working very long hours, I found myself getting lower and lower and not saying anything, because, really....who was going to help?? I literally have no-one here! One day Chelsea was doing her usual scream and kicking me as I was changing her nappy. I could feel myself getting angrier and angrier, but just breathed through it's then I kind of just lost it and started screaming at her and was holding her foot quite firmly at that point I told her how much I just hated being her mother I have never been so low and lost. Went to the GP and I am now on the 'urgent' list for 2 sleep schools - but only actually booked into one at the end of June - 8 week waiting list.
    But the best thing was that with hubby looking after Chelsea, he had a bit more tough love for her and after refusing to feed her when she kept waking and patting her to sleep, she had a 4 hour sleep, had a massive bottle (200 ml) and then slept another 5 hours!! The next morning, she had a 1.5 hour nap!!
    So I had been doing that and each night is different, but I was getting the 3 or 4 hour sleeps, but was getting fed up with the expressing at 2am, so went back to boob feeding and she kept waking every 1.5 hours! While I would pat her back to sleep, the constant waking was getting to me again! So I am back to feeding her the EBM at night - last night was shocking, but let's hope tonight is better!!!
    We have started solids as well and now that she is crawling, I try and get her to do laps of the house to wear her out!!
    Hubby has forbidden any talk of anymore kids as this has been incredibly hard for us. But my goodness, mothering sure mucks up your emotional state!! When the Dr stated PND I begged her not to put me on meds and she agreed saying that I am just exhausted! I adore my little girl, but it really makes me feel so weak and pathetic some times that I can't do this! So hopefully sleep school will help out! I am not looking for all night sleeps, but 4-5 hour stints would be a dream!!!

    Here are some pics of my lil cherub (also known as Devil Woman in my mothers group!!)

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1400844561.402387.jpg
    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1400844593.370330.jpg
    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1400844625.081956.jpg

  2. #502
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    MissX you poor thing, I think lack of sleep makes anyone get to the end of their tether. I hope you can get some help (and some sleep). She is adorably cute tho xx

  3. #503
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    MissX...firstly, you are NOT weak and pathetic, OK! Sleep deprivation can make even the most balanced person into a nutcase. Does your family live interstate? (Sorry, I can't remember!).
    I have no advice because I am very lucky to have a good-sleeper in Lucy (and it is NOTHING I have done, I know that!!). But I do want to offer my sympathy and best wishes. I hope the Sleep School lives up to its name. And I agree with Channy; Chelsea is VERY cute!!
    And thank you, my treatment is going well. It is hard, and scary, but the nursing staff have been just so lovely. My poor old veins are suffering from having IVs inserted each time, though!!
    Take care, and be nice to yourself. J xx.

    Sent from my GT-N7000B using The Bub Hub mobile app

  4. #504
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    Miss x it's so good to hear from you. I'm so sorry you've had a difficult time. I am of course not in your exact situation bit think I have some understanding of what it's like as Meadow's sleep is not great either to this day. We've had many awful times. She wakes frequently to BF and will only settle for me. It's completely exhausting. Motherhood is totally consuming in every way and I don't think a single mother out there hasn't reached breaking point at some time.

    I hope you find something that works for you and Chelsea. I am reading into gentle night weaning methods again at the moment and may start this in next three months when I feel the time is right. Go easy on yourself, it's incredibly hard. Xxx

  5. #505
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    Miss X I've been in pretty much the same boat as you. In fact I was only thinking about u (in a non-creepy non-stalker-ish kind of way!) this morning wondering how u r doing. Must have known something is up!

    I had the same thing happen, lost the plot due to exhaustion and feeling low all the time, so I went away for a week with just C (so I didn't have to juggle DD too). My dr has done the same thing, suggested PND but is happy to monitor me for now as long as I get support (which I've been doing). I hope u can get help and in to the sleep school ASAP - sleep deprivation iand feeling low is awful xx

  6. #506
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    Big hugs MissX. I've no advice as River is pretty good (like J I know that's her not something I have done) I hope things improve. She is adorable. I hope that all the exercise and having some solids make her sleep more 😊

    J I'm glad your treatment is going well even if your veins are suffering. Big hugs for you too.

    Sent from my HTC_0P6B6 using The Bub Hub mobile app

  7. #507
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    Thanks ladies - I am so much better than I was about a month ago. Still not on top of my game, but a lot more in control! I am back to loving being a mother and know I can get through it, but still have my days where it is just so bloody overwhelming.
    J yes all of my family live interstate and intrastate. My In-laws are up in Darwin and my mum is up in Mackay. Unfortunately neither of them can come and help (I have younger brothers still at school and inlaws still work full time)
    The best thing that happened out of all of this is that hubby is much more hands on now. If we are having a particularly bad night, he will get up at 2am to help out! He never would have done that before as he didn't think Chelsea would respond to him. Now he realises that she will settle better for him as there is no chance of milk! I have to go in for surgery soon, so it is a lot less stress on all our parts that hubby is now finally helping a lot more!
    I always knew it was going to be hard work, but we didn't expect we would have such a bad sleeper being that hubby and I LOVE our sleep! haha But we will get there!!
    Thank you ladies

  8. #508
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    MissX, huge hugs. Sorry you've been struggling. Motherhood is a hard job, and even harder when you have PND. That's great the DH is helping out more now. Have you bought about putting Chelsea in childcare 1 day a week? It would give you some time to yourself, and time to get things done. She's adorable

  9. #509
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lil Smurfy View Post
    MissX, huge hugs. Sorry you've been struggling. Motherhood is a hard job, and even harder when you have PND. That's great the DH is helping out more now. Have you bought about putting Chelsea in childcare 1 day a week? It would give you some time to yourself, and time to get things done. She's adorable
    I agree that's a good idea if it's something you'd be comfortable with Miss X. Would give you a break, we all need that!!

  10. #510
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    Hey, yes I have thought about it and have been told to do that, but I don't feel comfortable with it, nor can I justify the expense (in my mind). It truly is just the sleep that is the issue and I am a horrible mole with no sleep! Most days are great, but when we have had no sleep, I know just to stay home and try and entertain her!


 

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