You are very brave to be ready to go through a cycle again after your previous experience. I too cannot believe your ex blamed you
The headaches your dw is experiencing are common with syranel, I found drinking at least 2l of water a day helped. As well as Panadol or panadeine, but no nurofen. I was on 450 gonal f, which is a super high dose for slow responders. My first cycle I was really tired, but I actually found the tww was when I was at my most cranky. You just wish you had a window into your belly so you can see what is going on!
Olive oil is right, try and laugh as much as you can. We came up with funny terms for things like egg collection was 'harvesting' and transfer was 'replanting'. I would always ask DH 'was it good for you?' After transfer to lighten the mood of being up there on the table with my legs in the air and people looking at my bits, it's funny that you don't really get embarrassed when you go to the dr on your own, but I get embarrassed when my DH is there!
I have just remembered I had a meltdown in the hospital grounds after my second scan when I had read I should have been told I was ready for epu, but instead was told they were still small and we had to stim some more. I went outside with DH and cried and cried, telling him I was a failure, I couldn't grow eggs etc. he just sat there and listened to me rant and then asked me if I wanted to stop, it was just what I needed, his understanding and support of any decision I made.
I wish you all the very best for the cycle. I think the first one is the hardest and if you've come through so far without too many meltdowns you're doing well! Just try and remember the love you have for your wife and what the outcome will be.