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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bond Girl View Post
    I would make a formal complaint if a nurse said that to me!! That's outrageous!!
    I've been thinking about it

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  2. #22
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    If it was that easy to create a habit at 4 weeks we'd all have our babies in a routine by then! I really loathe the 'bad habit' theory for young babies. They change every few days at that age regardless of what you do!

    I fed DD to.sleep for about the first 5 months. She started sleeping through at 8 weeks, never regressed and easily changed to being rocked to sleep and then at 12 months to self settling.

    My DS isn't a dream sleeper like his big sister but he can be fed or rocked to sleep and usually does a block of at least 8 hours at night.From 8 months I've also left him to self settle as he's a lot heavier than DD and my back's giving out! So I've been physically unable to rock him and he's not wanted to feed.

    Google 'fourth trimester' for some more understanding on what your baby is experiencing at this stage.

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  4. #23
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    Oh this makes me so mad. We don't need guilt placed on us by 'professionals' - we can do that on our own. I fed DS to sleep until he was at least 10 months. Then I had to sit near his crib and sometimes rock him to sleep for a few months. Now I just put him in his crib and he'll either roll over and go straight to sleep or babble a bit until he goes to sleep unless he's unwell or teething. I still give him a bottle in the night sometimes. And this latest stage has been with almost no effort on my part - he's just older and more comfortable with being alone.

    And my DS was in the top ten worst sleepers ever! So please do what feels ok. I personally think co-sleeping is a beautiful thing for babies and their mummies too. You stop when it feels right for one or both of you. You sound like a lovely mummy, so please don't stress :-)

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  6. #24
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    Your bubba is so so cute. That nurse needs a kick in the bum. I'd complain too.

    Do what makes life easiest for you ATM and start working on a routine and breaking bad habits later when he's bigger and you've had time to adjust. In my experience babies adapt quickly to new things so don't be worried that you're doing things wrong.

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    Gorgeous bubba!! That Health nurse is an idiot! Babies don't start to form habits until they're around 12 weeks old. And even then it takes quite a lot of effort to form a habit... That's why routines are so hard to establish! Don't stress yourself over it hun, you just have to do whatever works for you at this early stage. I found that once my DS was around 4 months old he didn't need me to be so close anymore, he was more interested in the rest of the world! It then became easier to adjust his sleeping habits, as he wasn't quite so clingy to mummy. You're doing a great job, just trust your instincts!

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  10. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by CLEO26 View Post
    Ok I have a new problem!! He is now 4 1/2 weeks old. Im still co sleeping and my health nurse says I've created a bad habit.. they just say swaddle him and let him self settle but I dont want to do tbat yet. But anyway my problem is.....

    Feeding to sleep. It worka and he goes to sleep but there is no way he is falling asleep at night without a boob. Seriously... dont know what to do now.

    Anyone else do this at first and then got out of it somehow???

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    We feed to sleep every night. My now 5mth dd can self settle most days. By our night time routine is bath, boob & bed. She sleeps almost every night without waking again. Works for us. We had intended to use the bassinet beside the bed but she preferred to be snuggled up with me in bed.
    Why wouldn't she?! She has just spent 9mths all snugly, warm and cosy inside. We can't expect them to just go cold turkey into a big cot with hard edges as no heartbeat sounds.
    Dd is now sleeping in her cot. No problems. But it took a number of months before she was ready to sleep without snuggles all night.

    Don't rush yourself. Do what works for you. I refuse to believe that hugs, love and attention in any form can create bad habits for a child. If anything it gives them a greater sense of stability and confidence knowing that you will attend there very basic needs for love and affection. That health nurse is perhaps still running on a very old school train of thought.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CLEO26 View Post
    They so do need a kick u0 the **** sometimes. I had one visit me at my place as I was not yet confident to drive and she literally said in these words 5 mins after being in my house "have u tried to top yourself yet?" And the othwr4 one asks if I am on anything for anxiety!!! I dont need that stuff.. I needed time to adjust. Was so mad!
    Anyway, I agree.. we are the only mammal that makes them sleep alone. Okay I dont mind then for now. He is so small and doesn't want to be alone.

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    I just went back further and read this post.. That is truly repulsive for a health nurse who's roll it is to support, encourage and follow up on your and bubs health after birth to say such a thing. I would ignore everything these women said entirely. Perhaps this job isn't for them if they are saying such irresponsible & crass comments to otherwise vulnerable, tired and impressionable mothers.
    God forbid they say these disgusting comments to a mother who is already suffering from PND. Luckily you seem to have your wits about you Cleo and can see that these people are offering little to no help.

    Ps your baby is just divine.

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  14. #28
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    Thank you all. I knew I shpuld just go with my gut. Even if I pnly have one hand to do things with during the day its not a problem. It's not meant to be easy. I'd feel bad having him in a cot in another room crying. Nice to have some reassurance from others too.
    I will use the health clinic for weekly weigh ins for a few months and his immunizations but ill4 leave it at that I dont want to burn mt bridges.

    Although, I have dint suicide intervention training and tou do not say that to anyone at risk. I was lucky to not take it personally

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    Are there health reasons why you need to weigh weekly? Most bubs only need the scheduled checks unless there are feeding or development issues.

    I've had some very helpful MCHN experiences but even as a second time mum with a lot of confidence in what I'm doing, I still get thrown out and start to worry over silly little things based on what they say.

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  16. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stretched View Post
    Are there health reasons why you need to weigh weekly? Most bubs only need the scheduled checks unless there are feeding or development issues.

    I've had some very helpful MCHN experiences but even as a second time mum with a lot of confidence in what I'm doing, I still get thrown out and start to worry over silly little things based on what they say.

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    I'm with you stretched. Second time around and I'm still in tears over hurtful and very unhelpful things ppl say to me at time. Even more so in those first few months of no sleep and hormones going crazy


 

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