After some advice and support please, no judgement as I have done the best I can with the circumstances. This is a long read!
I have an almost 8 week old DD. In hospital, feeding was going well (albeit painful! and with nipple damage) but dd gained weight beautifully and no issues. Fast forward to 2 weeks old, and I had got to the stage that my nipples, particularly my right were so damaged I couldn't feed without crying, DD was taking 1 1/2 hrs to feed most times and was still hungry after, it was a battle at each feed and we'd have to top her up with expressed milk and then with formula and then the cycle would begin again an hour later. Because she wasn't draining my right breast properly, I developed mastitis and my supply dwindled to about 5-10ml from that side. I was becoming depressed and began resenting and dreading each feed.
I struggled through til 3-4 weeks by expressing on the right side and feeding on the left side to try and build my supply up again. At 3.5 weeks I stopped breastfeeding completely and turned to expressing so dd was getting 80% expressed and 20% formula. By switching to bottle feeding, it saved my sanity and my nipples, and I recovered from the mastitis and my supply returned.
I saw a lactation consultant at 2.5 weeks, who said my technique was fine, and she diagnosed posterior tongue tie. I was reluctant to get it snipped as my dd has other health issues, and I didn't want to put her through more trauma, especially when I was doing okay with expressing and bottle feeding. I also wanted a second opinion from my paed. A child health nurse also just saw dd crying and thought she had a tongue tie straight away due to her heart shaped tongue. I saw my GP and he was noncommittal. We saw the paed last week for her 6 week check, and he basically said it was nonsense and she doesn't have it.
So now I'm confused, and lost without a reason as to why breastfeeding didn't work. I'd love to get back to feeding, but now think I've left it too late. I feel like a bit of a failure, even though dd is still getting breast milk, just via a bottle, not directly from me. If my technique was fine, and she doesn't have a tongue tie, why didn't feeding work for us?
So I was wondering, what would you do? Go get it snipped even tho dr said she doesn't have one? I just don't want to cause her any more pain and I also don't want her to have an unnecessary procedure if she doesn't need it. I've made an appointment with a dr who snips them but I'm unsure whether to go thru with it.
I'm also worried about speech and teeth issues down the track which is the other reason im considering snipping so at least I have peace of mind.
Any advice/thoughts would be appreciated!