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  1. #61
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    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Hi Carly - I read this thread when you first posted, went to reply then it slipped my mind.

    Glad to hear you're home safely. Just wanted to add, and sorry if it's been mentioned earlier, but it might be worth getting tested for STIs as well.

    I hope you're feeling ok. Counselling will be so helpful. Please don't waste time thinking you should have known or something like that. Men like him are masters at what they do x

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    KaraB  (12-02-2014)

  3. #62
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    Hi Carly another one here who admires your strength and am so happy you are back home. I have no words for your ex at all

    You however are going to be a wonderful mum and someday you will meet someone who will admire your strength and beautiful open heart.

    ❤️

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    KaraB  (12-02-2014)

  5. #63
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    Thanks for all your lovely support. Luckily I was all clear on all the STI tests- a miracle as I know for definite now he has some nasty stuff so that was a relief.I thought joining a forum for women who have suffered at the hands of these sociopathic/ psychopathic/ narcissistic men would help, but they were beyond mean to me, saying I was a murderer and a liar for considering abortion and made me so upset I wish I hadn’t bothered- the complete opposite of what a support forum is supposed to offer, they are awful, the internet can be horrible at times....I still cry pretty much every hour and visibly shake, but I hope my mood will improve once I try and forget him. He’s changed his name on social media sites apparently to “The Strangular” and saying how he’s almost 30 and so proud he’s escaped having any kids, but is looking forward to a Valentines break with his teenage girlfriend/his comedy show next month- it’s beyond disgusting how he gets away with this and I've told my well meaning "friends" to stop telling me now. Hopefully my counselling date will come up soon and I can start moving on, but I'm still terrified. Just being in my own bed helps though and being able to stretch out in an actual bath. The weather is so bad here, minus degrees and everywhere is flooded due to the constant rain/storms, so that’s a bit rubbish as I’ve discovered now that none of my previous winter, warm clothes fit me very well now I have a bump! The scan was a bit surreal. I’m 17 weeks pregnant today. Turns out I conceived on his Birthday, oh well…Thanks again for all your messages x

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    KaraB  (12-02-2014),LoCo  (12-02-2014),mumbron  (12-02-2014),Mummy Potato  (14-02-2014)

  7. #64
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    The strangular? Omg, your ex and one of my ex's would get along like a house on fire :/. I agree dont let your friends keep tabs on him wtf are they doing that for anyway?? It doesn't help you to hear that stuff! You need to not know any more about him or what he's doing. 17 weeks wow did you find out the sex of your baby at the scan? You should be able to tell by now

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    Make sure you talk to a doctor if you feel like you may actually be suffering from depression and not just emotional from your experience. Depression caused by pregnancy hormones, like post-natal depression, is surprisingly common regardless of what you have going on in your life.

    Good idea to ignore the updating 'friends'. Its time for you to focus on yourself and start to get excited about the amazing new chapter of your life that you are starting!

    Sent from my GT-S5830 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    KaraB  (12-02-2014)

  10. #66
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    Thanks ladies. Makes me sick there are so many of these violent nutcase out there I keep hearing about him and how he's gushing over this teenager/denying all knowledge of me, which isn't helping so I've told them to stop reporting back and they were offended, but I can't worry about their feelings right now as it isn't doing me any good. I chose not to know the gender, regret it a bit now, but I was very panicky/upset and just wanted to get out of there. My family reckons it's a girl though.....my mum had the same bad sickness carrying me and apparently the bumps are a clue (??) My doctor made me fill out a form about depression and gave me some contacts of where to get help etc so I hope that works out as I can't be taking tablets etc now and I just want to feel better as I such a wreck.Porridge is my new best friend though, getting through a lot of that so that's something!

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    KaraB  (13-02-2014)

  12. #67
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    Glad to hear of an update. Look after yourself and keep the porridge up xx

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    There are definitely anti-depressant meds you can take while pregnant if you think they might be necessary. Don't feel that you need to do it tough, part of looking after baby is making sure that mum is well first and foremost.

    I think it's exciting not knowing baby's sex. The bump shape thing is just an old wives tale though - according to everyone DD should have been a DS!

    Sent from my GT-S5830 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    KaraB  (13-02-2014)

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    Im so glad you're back home and have been given the resources to get some counselling.

    As for comments on that other forum, well I just don't undrrstand how any decent human being could be nasty towards you after what you've been through. Its just disgraceful Please don't pay them any mind.

    Take care of yourself hun. Go easy on yourself and don't be afraid to lean on others for support.

    Wishing you all the very best x

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  17. #70
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    Your friends were offended because you are not wanting to hear about what your abusive ex is doing?? Some friends! I had the same problem with one of my friends when I was pregnant with my now 20 month old- her father is really twisted and disturbed also. I couldn't hear about him and I really started to not want to talk to her because she kept asking me questions about if I had heard from him, even saying things like- its not over he will come back and try to do this or that. (For the record i didnt hear a thing from him, thank god). I was like wtf? This isn't an episode of neighbors and my problems weren't there for her personal entertainment. I don't speak to her anymore. I think you should do the same with those people who call themselves your friends or at the very least distance yourself from them. It's not difficult to work out that you are already anxious and really need to focus on other things and leave him out of it. It's the only way forward regardless of what you chose to do. Why are they so keen to keep tabs anyway? That's just weird..
    Last edited by KaraB; 13-02-2014 at 08:49.


 

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