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  1. #31
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    OP, now you've done it, you have to tell her.

    I can't tell you, if my sister did it, I'd be livid. However if the relationship broke down, he cheated on me with hookers, gave me SDTs, whatever & she knew and DIDNT tell me, I'd be so so hurt!

    This is why I don't snoop, because you never know what you're going to find & either way there's a good possibility it's going to hurt her.

  2. #32
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    Well I am very close to my sister. Now, I don't agree with u going through the wallet but I would tell her asap anyway. You could even say that one fell out when u moved it & didn't want to say anything in front of everyone or u were tipsy at the time & its not something u normally do but u had such a bad feeling. At least then she would know & could do what she wanted with the info.

    I don't agree with anyone having a joint at all but that's only my opinion & wouldn't want to be around that at all.

    I've learnt over the years if u have a bad gut feeling about someone. Trust it. You may not be able to put your finger on exactly why but you're usually right.

    At the end of the day your sister is the most important person here & I think it's lovely you care so much about her. If u tell her & she asks u to back off so be it but at least she'll go into it with the info instead of it being hidden from her. I think she'd be more angry if she found out in a year but then found out u knew all this time.

    I would mention it to mine for sure. I'd hope she would do the same for me.

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  4. #33
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    Going through s strangers wallet, not cool.

    Hooker business cards, also not cool.

    I wouldnt be saying anything to her as what u did imo is a huge breach of privacy and trust but maybe just keep your ears and eyes open, you obviously dont want ur sister to get hurt either.

    Best of luck.

  5. #34
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    I think everyone has covered the going through the wallet was wrong, so I am going another direction.
    Smoking a joint is a big no no in my books. But I left an drug addict ex, so will never allow drugs anywhere near my home ever again. He started off with just one to relax after work. In honesty I'd be more concerned about that than hooker cards

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  7. #35
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    Maybe your sister and him use escorts together ? You never no. While I can kind f understand why you did it, if you don't feel guilty about it tell your sister and deal with the consequences. But IMO give the guy a chance, a one time meeting isn't enough to figure him out

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  9. #36
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    I get wanting to protect your sister because I am the same, I am fiercely loyal and protective of the people in my family even if they don't deserve it but that does not make you going through his wallet ok but you can't take it back now. In all honesty if you and your sister are that close maybe you should just talk to her about all of this, voice your concerns and if you feel the need admit to snooping it may not change anything because she is a adult and can be with whoever she chooses but it might make you feel better and might stop you from going through this poor mans stuff every time you see him.

  10. #37
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    I never said I did the right thing I know snooping in hi wallet wasn't right, this isn't the issue here and all sure all of you guys have done things your not proud off so lay off. My issue is I believe this person isn't being honest with my sister and I see a lot of bad people in my life and see how they manipulate nice honest people. And I will never ever stay out if my sisters life I will always look out for her and go to any expense to make sure she is looked after and u expect the same in return so no I will not but out of her life if you don't agree with that that's fine

  11. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Midwestgirl80 View Post
    OMG, why the hell is everyone attacking you?! I would have done the same in a heartbeat if I thought for a second someone could hurt my sister. You found two cards for HOOKERS- that is no doubt a deal breaker in my mind and surely my sisters. I don't care how that info was found out, now she knows (well she will when you tell her) and if I were her, he'd be long gone. Sometimes the ends DO justify the means.

    I honestly question the people on this forum that only one other person has come to your defense.
    Well clearly they haven't been together long as the very close sister is only just meeting him. Perhaps they were from before he met her sister. I have things in my purse from before I met dh and weve been together 5 years. Regardless. .. its NONE of her business whats in his wallet. None. What so ever

    You sound nosey and possessive more than protective op. Its a bit weird tbh

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    Last edited by MrsBid; 24-01-2014 at 09:06.

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  13. #39
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    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Yeah I would understand wanting to tell her about the cards, but it's the way in which you discovered them which makes it hard. If you'd found out about them any other way, say if he opened his wallet in front of you and you happened to catch a glimpse, then yes, you could mention it casually to your sis... but even then, it's not really your place to do so.
    Any conversation that has to start with, "I snooped through his wallet the other night and found...." is pretty bad, really.
    I'm thinking that the cards are not even something he is truly trying to hide from her if they are starting to see each other and he has chosen to leave them in his wallet- maybe they aren't as sinister as they appear?

    "Life Is Ours, We Live It Our Way".

  14. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by aarentz View Post
    I never said I did the right thing I know snooping in hi wallet wasn't right, this isn't the issue here and all sure all of you guys have done things your not proud off so lay off. My issue is I believe this person isn't being honest with my sister and I see a lot of bad people in my life and see how they manipulate nice honest people. And I will never ever stay out if my sisters life I will always look out for her and go to any expense to make sure she is looked after and u expect the same in return so no I will not but out of her life if you don't agree with that that's fine
    The expense might be your relationship with your sister if you push the boundaries too far.

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