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  1. #21
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    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1390349905.267974.jpg

    I guess she's not a perfect mum either.. YOu know what? That's okay!

    There is no right or wrong way to be a parent.. Attachment parenting may feel natural for some mums. It doesn't feel natural for me. Is my way the right way? Nope. There is no right way.

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  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by ~Marigold~ View Post
    Well, no. It isn't. I have a thread of my struggles with sleep related issues on here somewhere where I basically kept a diary of my CC journey. Anyway, DD was never left to cry- she whinged, sooked etc, but was never dumped in her (well my room, she still shares my room) room in distress.
    I have a feeling you think you know better (cos you were there, right?) so I am happy to agree to disagree.

    "Life Is Ours, We Live It Our Way".
    Not everyone who does CC or CIO does it that way. People DO just close the door and let their babies scream. They do do it exactly the way she described it. No one is saying you did. But this is the view that many people have of CC and CIO because it really is what so many people do.

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  5. #23
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    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Quote Originally Posted by SugarSkull View Post
    That's the problem though. People assume that you leave your baby in their cot, turn the lights off, close the door, walk out and leave them to cry hysterically to the point they can hardly breathe.
    That's NOT how you do it! That's not how I've done it. I've never let DS and DD cry hysterically. There's a huge difference between a cry and a whinge/protest. Wah... Pause... Wah... Pause for a minute.. Wah. DD does this some nights when trying to fall asleep and she's out within 5 minutes. I've walked in there a few times to give her a pat on the bum and she's pretty much asleep. If she cries, I give her a cuddle, burp her, give her more milk, take her for a walk, do anything to calm her before putting her back down.

    I don't think men have these conversations. It's like a competition for women. I'm a better parent because I breastfeed. I'm a better parent because I bottle feed. I'm a better parent because my child sleeps with me. I'm a better parent because I've taught my child how to sleep.

    Guess what... WE'RE ALL AMAZING MUMS!!!! Unless you place your child in dangerous situations, smoke and drink til you're blind around your child etc.

    Peaches is the last person who should be passing judgement on anybody.
    Perfectly said ^

    "Life Is Ours, We Live It Our Way".

  6. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    Not everyone who does CC or CIO does it that way. People DO just close the door and let their babies scream. They do do it exactly the way she described it. No one is saying you did. But this is the view that many people have of CC and CIO because it really is what so many people do.

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    This has been my experience too.

  7. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by duncan_bayne View Post
    Actually, CC is helping them develop self-soothing mechanisms that will serve them well in adult life. Yes, you do leave the baby to cry, but not indefinitely, and not in a way that could convince the baby that you aren't there to provide and care for him or he
    Perhaps if you don't have a problem with how she characterised it, you should find out more about it.
    I don't need to find out about how to let my baby cry

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    Quote Originally Posted by SugarSkull View Post
    I don't think men have these conversations. It's like a competition for women. I'm a better parent because I breastfeed. I'm a better parent because I bottle feed. I'm a better parent because my child sleeps with me. I'm a better parent because I've taught my child how to sleep.
    We don't compete on technique, we compete on outcomes, most of which are utterly random and not connected in any way to our actions.

    I wish I were joking.

  10. #27
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    Its the same as anything in parenting, there will always be people who disagree, who feel thigns should be done a certain way. You just need to make choices that are right for you and your family and screw what others think of them.

    You did what was best for yourself and your family Marigold. Dont let anyone, especially some celebrity on tv make you feel bad for it. Xo

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  12. #28
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    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Quote Originally Posted by LotusMum View Post
    No matter which way you chose to parent, someone does the opposite, no matter which method you talk about, you will offend someone who's nerve has been touched. You literally cannot please every mother.
    THe amount of awful anti-AP threads, comments, opinions, and articles I have seen thrown around, not just here, but everywhere in my parenting life, has been enormous. If I post a for, article, I get slammed for being anti the opposite, which really isnt entirely correct, sometimes I am just for something that I chose to do, yanno?
    I like Peaches, I think she appears to be such a loving, kind and gentle Mum, and its lovely to see a celebrity talking about AP in a positive light, rather than just denegrating it as being chained to your baby, and how poor your husband must be to be missing out on sex because of cosleeping blah blah.
    I understand that she may not have said what she was trying to say in a way that showed she was talking about her personal opinion, but we have all been guilty of that one. It really is a minefield this parenting bizzo.
    As for CIO, it is exactly walking off and letting your baby cry itself to sleep, the CIO stands for Cry It Out. CC is a form of that, but far more gentle, I understand that, and they are both quite different from each other, but are from the same family. Its not something I have ever been able to do, as it doesnt feel right or natrual TO ME.
    As for women's bodies, well, biologicly speaking, yes they are built for having babies and breastfeeding them, we are mammals. Luckily we are also human and are able to do far more than "just" that.
    And I have zero problem with a mother embracing her parenting style, whatever that may be. Heck, I always kind of thought of myself as an AP kinda mum but I guess I broke the "rules" by getting DD into her own cot at 10 months, lol.
    What I do have a problem with is putting one particular style down in order to build another up.
    I actually hadn't even heard of all of these labels/styles etc until I joined BH; I thought we all just did what felt right for us.

    "Life Is Ours, We Live It Our Way".

  13. #29
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    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    Quote Originally Posted by SugarSkull View Post
    Attachment 49444

    I guess she's not a perfect mum either.. YOu know what? That's okay!

    There is no right or wrong way to be a parent.. Attachment parenting may feel natural for some mums. It doesn't feel natural for me. Is my way the right way? Nope. There is no right way.
    I saw those pics @SugarSkull.
    Hey I thought that AP parent's only ever "wear" their babies... And hers was in a pram?! Tut tut Peaches

    "Life Is Ours, We Live It Our Way".

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  15. #30
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    My MIL did this to my son the one and only time she had him overnight. He was 6 weeks old!!! And she's in her 40s and has 7 children - genuinely believed that was the way to establish a sleeping routine, leave them in a room with the door closed for 10 minutes while they scream! So peaches is right people do use CIO this way. Her statement as a whole doesn't really offend me.


    Age 20, engaged, mummy to 3yo DS and TTC his sibling! Living life backwards

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