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  1. #11
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    lexim is offline Winner 2013 - Newbie of the Year
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    Quote Originally Posted by keljian View Post
    Thanks for your replies. I appreciate everything you're suggesting and of course I welcome any input from Mums or Dads

    Already read "Being dad"

    Perhaps I should be more specific about what I'm asking for:
    1. I would like some sort of magic decoder ring (dictionary) for things like bunny rugs and rompers and everything in between
    2. I'd like some info on daily routines after birth
    3. I'd like some info about supporting women post surgery with C sections
    4. I'd like some info about dealing with bubs on a day to day basis (beyond the wonder weeks)
    Honestly
    1, 2 and 4 you just learn as you go. (I don't even know what a romper is??) I think we try and prepare but nothing really prepares you. All babies are different and will do different things. People who say ALL babies need to have a routine by 6 weeks are kidding themselves - that's not saying they can't it's just that majority don't.
    Babies will eat and sleep for the first couple of months. Just be there to support her and help her.
    When she's feeding offer her cups of tea and cold water. One of The best things my DH did was keep the fridge stocked with pump bottles of water. I hate room temp water so that was great.
    Get her fav tv shows/movies on DVD/iPad so the long hours feeding during the day/night aren't so "dull"

    Becoming a parent is amazing, terrifying, incredible, life changing and confusing. We learn how to do it everyday and sadly there's nothing that can prepare us for it.

    Be hands on and helpful and that will be perfect




    DH, Me and our two boys.
    #3 due 30th Sept

  2. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to lexim For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (19-01-2014),keljian  (19-01-2014),Mod-Nomsie  (20-01-2014),~BEXTER~  (19-01-2014)

  3. #12
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    I had a c/sec with my 2nd. I was petrified. Dh helped by holding my hand, reminding me to breathe and just keeping me calm.

    Post c/sec.. we had a toddler aswell so helped alot there but things that would be most helpful for a bub.
    Even if your partner is breastfeeding, you can help by passing bub to her and then burping / settling. Breastfeeding is hard work at the beginning! Offer her snacks & water while feeding.

    Also handy to have afew chuck cloths in reach (either cheap hand towels or a pack of traditional cloth squares from Big W work great)

    Look around and see if a load of washing needs doing. Then hang it out and then put it away - your wife is recovering from surgery.

    Prep easy snacks (fruit salad, veg sticks, crackers and dip) and cook nutritious dinners.

    In regards to bub: when they cry go through the check list.. Hungry? Nappy change? Too hot / cold? Tired? Just wants a cuddle? If bub wont settle, try singing. They love the sound of your voice.

    Oh, and youtube how to wrap a baby, though the nurses will show you in hospy too.

    I find it easiest to follow bubs lead especially as a newborn: if theyre hungry, feed them. Tired, let them sleep.

    If bub has day and night mixed up, take them out in the sunshine during the day. Keep it dark and minimal interaction at night, lots of smiles during the day.

    Hope thats of some use! Good luck. Youre already a great dad.


    Sent from my GT-I9505 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    keljian  (19-01-2014),LilBlessing  (04-02-2014)

  5. #13
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    OP you know what? Even without all the books and stuff you have the kind of attitude that's going to make you a great parent. And to be honest the real learning happens when you have your baby. Lord knows I read everything I could get my hands on twice with my first and I still felt pretty clueless for the first month. Try not to put so much pressure on yourself you will be more than fine

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    keljian  (20-01-2014),Mod-Nomsie  (20-01-2014),Starfish30  (19-01-2014),~BEXTER~  (19-01-2014)

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    I bought a book for my DF called 'Man with a Pram' can't remember who wrote it but it was all from a mans perspective and what they can do. It was helpful for my DF and had some humorous parts to break it up a bit.

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    Just looked it up. It is written by Jon Farry and Stephan Mitchell. It's about $20 online. Good luck!

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  11. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by lexim View Post
    Honestly
    1, 2 and 4 you just learn as you go. (I don't even know what a romper is??) I think we try and prepare but nothing really prepares you. All babies are different and will do different things. People who say ALL babies need to have a routine by 6 weeks are kidding themselves - that's not saying they can't it's just that majority don't.
    Babies will eat and sleep for the first couple of months. Just be there to support her and help her.
    When she's feeding offer her cups of tea and cold water. One of The best things my DH did was keep the fridge stocked with pump bottles of water. I hate room temp water so that was great.
    Get her fav tv shows/movies on DVD/iPad so the long hours feeding during the day/night aren't so "dull"

    Becoming a parent is amazing, terrifying, incredible, life changing and confusing. We learn how to do it everyday and sadly there's nothing that can prepare us for it.

    Be hands on and helpful and that will be perfect




    DH, Me and our two boys.
    #3 due 30th Sept
    Oh I agree about the routine part especially. I think what stressed me out the most with my first child was trying to get my baby into a routine and timing feeds ugh. I'm now having my 6th child and think being to strict with timing everything is just putting too much pressure on yourselves. Admittedly breastfeeding made my life a million times easier compared to bottle feeding my first. Timing for feeds can be important with formula feeding but breastfeeding is a lot more flexible because it's so easily digested. If she's breastfeeding I say if baby seems hungry or unsettled she should try feeding him regardless of how long ago he fed, sometimes they just need to for comfort. It makes the world of difference settling them. Everyone wants to get it just right, but like some other posters said- all babies are different. I would encourage you both not to try to do everything to the letter all the time. Quite often they won't sleep for exactly 3 hours between feeds or whatever and that's ok. You just muddle your way through and eventually a pattern will emerge on it's own. Lexims suggestions for being there for her are spot on. Good luck
    Last edited by KaraB; 19-01-2014 at 17:49.

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  13. #17
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    Also Baby Management for Men by Hank Hannson (spelling?)

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    keljian  (19-01-2014)

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    The best book I've found is Baby Love by Robyn Barker. Some very sensible friends recommended to me as they also found it useful.

    It's too dry to sit down and read cover to cover, but it's great in the first few weeks for looking up things as they arise. I like how it tells you what the range of normal is and doesn't make you feel like an idiot. You can just read each section as you need to. It's more of a reference book than a narrative.

    The feeding sections on both breast and bottle feeding is detailed and would give you ideas about what to expect and what you can do to support her. It's divided up into age categories so you can just start with the newborn section and worry about the rest as you need to.

    The sleeping section also touches on a range of different philosophies, but does give you an idea about what are normal sleeping pattern, ideas for routines etc.

  16. #19
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    How about W Sears "the baby book"? It's a great read, talks about different stages of development and it's written by a dad (who is also a paediatrician) together with his wife

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  18. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfish30 View Post
    How about W Sears "the baby book"? It's a great read, talks about different stages of development and it's written by a dad (who is also a paediatrician) together with his wife

    Thanks! - I just downloaded the audio book for listening to->from work in the mornings.


 

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