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  1. #131
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    Quote Originally Posted by tastychicken View Post
    I live in beach front 3 bedroom apartment in one of the nicest suburbs in my city. I am going to uni for a career change after working in finance. I had my first child at 20 then the second at 22. They are 5 and 6. Yes my marriage failed but I am mid 20's and now seeing a lovely man who thinks of my kids like his own. We get takeaway if we want, we go places for fun. We even go on holidays.

    This was achievable for me at 20. (No trust funds or family support either).
    That's awesome but I am sure you know yourself that you're the exception not the norm?

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  3. #132
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    The only reason I think slightly negatively about young mums is I think back to when I was young, and I was...young. There is so much living to do, what is the rush?

    Also, how young is too young? Is 20 too young? How about 17? 16? 13? where does it end? Some of the young mums on BH try and make out that any age is alright. I've even read on here that 15 is ok if you are a young loving mum. Sorry - but there is no way anyone can convince me that is ok.

    PS - anyone who thinks that 30 is an older mum - is way too young to be having kids

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  5. #133
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    I think it's wonderful that there are some young mums on here that are obviously driven, ambitious and want to make the best life possible for themselves and their children.

    The unfortunate reality is that these stereotypes of young mums exist because that's what a lot of people see. This really does suck for those mums who don't fit the mould, and you should fight against it, because by doing that you can help to raise the standards and expectations of your peers - thus generating a better view of young mums in our society.

    Until this view is shifted by the majority of young mums it is not unreasonable to consider that people with longer and broader life experience will advise younger generations to wait just a little while to start a family.


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  7. #134
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    Quote Originally Posted by kw123 View Post
    I'm still spun out that some people think 30 ish is an "older" mum lol. I get that it's older than some people who have kids but I guess I assumed they would see themselves as younger mums rather than people older than them as older mums, if that makes sense! I'm pretty sure the average age is around 30 for Australia which by definition means it isn't "older". Anyway I know it doesn't matter it's just quite new to me to feel old!

    I used 30 as the age to compare the difference in circumstances in one of my previous posts. I definitely don't think 30 makes you an older mum it seems pretty average.

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  9. #135
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    I think its just used as a comparison, not defining 30 as old IYKWIM? So I became a mother at 22, so someone who became and mother at 30 is an older mother than me but not an 'old' mother? Sorry hard to explain...

    I actually didnt consider myself to be a young mum until I went to the hospital to have DS1 and was assigned to the young mums group and I was offered classes such as how to live out of home and life skills... made me LOL as I had been living out of home and supporting myslef for years and I was weeks off of being married.

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  11. #136
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    Pretty simple, if you had a child before turning 29yo you're with the youngest.
    After 29yo you are part of the oldest.

    Doesn't make you old though!!

    PS : 28.9 years was the median age of first-time mothers in 2010 in Australia.

  12. #137
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    Oh wow, I made it into the youngest group by 5 weeks

    Funny story, but when I had my first (at 28 almost 29years) I was the second youngest on the maternity ward in a large mat hospital in the middle of Sydney. There was one girl who was 16, and then I was the next youngest. Very strange to me as I don't think almost 29 is young to have kids!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lili81 View Post
    Pretty simple, if you had a child before turning 29yo you're with the youngest.
    After 29yo you are part of the oldest.

    Doesn't make you old though!!

    PS : 28.9 years was the median age of first-time mothers in 2010 in Australia.

  13. #138
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    I haven't read all the replies but I was/am a young mother and boy did I cop it from people in our community. However I have now been parenting for 8 years, 3 children later and although I don't get judged for my age anymore I now get judged for my parenting choices.

    In my experience if someone is a judgemental person they pass judgment on anything not just your age. Embrace the advice, ignore the judgements and remain confident in yourself as a person and a parent! Life's to short to worry about the stuff everyone else thinks. Enjoy your babes whether your 18 or 40 cause they grow up to damn fast not too!

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  15. #139
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    The only reason I think slightly negatively about young mums is I think back to when I was young, and I was...young. There is so much living to do, what is the rush?
    While I respect your opinion I believe that everyone's idea of 'living' is different. I always wanted to be a mother. Life is so short and if I was to pass away tomorrow I am so grateful that I have got to experience being a mother to 3 children. Anything else I experience is an added bonus. So for me 'living' is about creating a beautiful family and enjoying every moment with them. I can travel and focus on my career later. Right now I'm living and I'm doing it surrounded by an amount of love that I never new existed.

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  17. #140
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarylee View Post
    While I respect your opinion I believe that everyone's idea of 'living' is different. I always wanted to be a mother. Life is so short and if I was to pass away tomorrow I am so grateful that I have got to experience being a mother to 3 children. Anything else I experience is an added bonus. So for me 'living' is about creating a beautiful family and enjoying every moment with them. I can travel and focus on my career later. Right now I'm living and I'm doing it surrounded by an amount of love that I never new existed.
    That was wonderfully written, you expressed so well how I feel about having my children young.

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