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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by anewme View Post
    I am well aware of this.
    My kids and I were a victim of stranger crime less than a month ago so it is dam raw.
    Was it my fault that 2 grown men chose us to attack. I was supervising them. I did my best to protect them. Bad things happen. Bad people exist.

    People that want to blame for their decision disgust me.

    We are the ones left to deal with the trauma they caused and statements like yours are incredible hurtful and could send someone over the edge.
    I don't know the details, and I don't need to, but I do know that in no way is anything that happened your fault.

    Crime happens to all sorts of people from all sorts of walks of life.

    And it is never the victims fault. Full. Stop.

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  3. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    I agree, however rapists won't stop raping. Murderers won't stop murdering, that's life unfortunately. Therefore, TAKE REASONABLE CARE OF YOURSELVES AND YOUR FAMILIES.

    Not hard.



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    You're right, it isn't hard. It doesn't matter though. If a rapist wants to rape you, he will. He'll find a way or an opportunity. If someone sets out to murder you then he will and you'll be dead.

    And society will blame you. They'll find a reason it was your fault.

    Every time someone is raped, the list gets longer. Don't dress this way, don't walk there, don't drink too much, don't get in that taxi, don't wait at the taxi rank, don't go to night clubs, don't be in stair wells you should have taken the elevator, don't run after dark, don't run early in the morning, don't go to public toilets if there's no one else around, don't leave your front door open, don't leave your windows open or unlocked, always lock your car doors when you get in, don't walk to your car alone at night after work, don't work in a store by yourself..

    The list gets longer and longer, and I've yet to see a short, to the point list for men.
    Don't rape.

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  5. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by FutureMa View Post
    What has that got to do with my argument?

    I'm obviously not being very clear. We need to supervise our children at all times so that incidents like this can be avoided.

    Why is what I am saying so offensive? I thought that that is just parenting 101. Obviously bad things still happen but it greatly reduces the chance of it.
    I think I get what you mean Future Ma. And I doubt anyone disagrees that supervision is important - for lots of reasons.

    BUT, in reality there are lots of occasions where children will be unsupervised, even if it's just for 5 minutes. You will have driven yourself crazy if you have supervised every second of your child's life by the time they are 6.

    Also, it's interesting to ponder the potential damage such intense helicopter parenting could do to a child too. At some stage our kids are going to become adults and it's no good if they reach adulthood without learning some of the skills necessary to be confident and independent.

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  7. #54
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    I can actually see both sides of this.
    Yes rapists are to blame but also parents have to take some responsibilty.

    EVERYONE knows there are rapists out there, so lets take appropriate caution in public places. EG, supervising our children, not walking around with your b00bs out at night.

    I think we can all agree the world would be a better place if there were no rapists but this is the world we life in. That is just the reality of it.

    How many cases a year of child abduction, rape, abuse is there, come on people its common knowledge. Lets be sensible about this...accompany your children into toilets (up to a certain age), teach your children about stranger danger, and for god sakes lets not wander around with b00bs, bum showing in the middle of the night. I mean its just asking for trouble.

    This is the world we live in...yes it not ideal but its reality.

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  9. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by loislane2010 View Post
    I can actually see both sides of this.
    Yes rapists are to blame but also parents have to take some responsibilty.

    EVERYONE knows there are rapists out there, so lets take appropriate caution in public places. EG, supervising our children, not walking around with your b00bs out at night.

    I think we can all agree the world would be a better place if there were no rapists but this is the world we life in. That is just the reality of it.

    How many cases a year of child abduction, rape, abuse is there, come on people its common knowledge. Lets be sensible about this...accompany your children into toilets (up to a certain age), teach your children about stranger danger, and for god sakes lets not wander around with b00bs, bum showing in the middle of the night. I mean its just asking for trouble.

    This is the world we live in...yes it not ideal but its reality.
    As I previously stated (and I'm starting to wish people knew what reality actually is so I could stop repeating myself), the reality of sexual assault and abuse is you are more likely to be sexually assaulted by someone you know and is close to you. Your children are more likely to be sexually assaulted by their father or uncle or close family friend than by a man out in public. So by your logic, you need to stop having your b00bs out anywhere, even in your own home in case your husband is unable to control himself and rapes you because you tempted him with your state of undress. You need to supervise your children at all times when their father is home in case he decides that because they aren't supervised, then quite obviously he is allowed to f0ck them and does so, and you will partly be to blame because you are the parent with the working knowlege of reality and you did not supervise your children appropriately.


    Eta: Just putting this disclaimer on here. I do not believe my previous statement. At no time is it ever a victim of sexual assaults fault they were raped or molested. The blame and responsibility lies soley with the rapist and never should it be anywhere else.

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    Last edited by Jennaisme; 14-01-2014 at 09:03.

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  11. #56
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    Can't be bothered saying the same thing over and over

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  13. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    I agree, however rapists won't stop raping. Murderers won't stop murdering, that's life unfortunately. Therefore, TAKE REASONABLE CARE OF YOURSELVES AND YOUR FAMILIES.

    Not hard.



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    I agree. Of course the creep who commited this crime is to blame - i'm sure we all agree on this. I think the argument over supervision comes in because we are talking about a 2 YEAR OLD!

  14. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by loislane2010 View Post
    I

    EVERYONE knows there are rapists out there, so lets take appropriate caution in public places. EG, supervising our children, not walking around with your b00bs out at night.

    How many cases a year of child abduction, rape, abuse is there, come on people its common knowledge. Lets be sensible about this...accompany your children into toilets (up to a certain age), teach your children about stranger danger, and for god sakes lets not wander around with b00bs, bum showing in the middle of the night. I mean its just asking for trouble.

    This is the world we live in...yes it not ideal but its reality.
    So men are slavering beasts with no self control should they catch a glimpse of cleavage or bum they will throw you down and rape you? By that argument there would be no rape in countries where women where the burka or hijab.

    Are people not reading what others have posted?

    Statistically speaking, children are sexually assaulted by a friend of family member....how are you going to stop that?

    Women are mostly raped by a man they know....how are you going to stop that?

    It is NEVER the victims fault, always the perpetrators. End of story.

    Sexual Assaults occur because there are rapists living in our community. No rapists, no sexual assaults. Unfortunately it does not work the other way...no bum/boobs, no walking home alone...you can still be raped in your home by a man you know
    Don't let your children go to a toilet alone? They can still be sexually assaulted by a family member.

    Sure take the precautions that you feel are right for your family, but remember always, that stranger danger is not the only danger.

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  16. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by loislane2010 View Post
    EVERYONE knows there are rapists out there, so lets take appropriate caution in public places. EG, supervising our children, not walking around with your b00bs out at night.


    , and for god sakes lets not wander around with b00bs, bum showing in the middle of the night. I mean its just asking for trouble.

    This is the world we live in...yes it not ideal but its reality.
    Sorry but a way a person dresses does NOT cause them to be raped or assaulted. I don't agree with this statement AT ALL.

    Anyone wearing anything can be assaulted.




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    Ugh.

    Those poor bloody people. A horrid crime committed against their children and now they may come across sh!t saying they played a part in that crime. Just like the poor woman who was assaulted on NYE and how it was a 'reminder' to us not to be out at night (and she has to read alllll of the news articles stating how she could have 'avoided' crossing paths with a criminal), yet the man who was assaulted had a cowardly crime committed against him, most sad thing ever, etc.

    I hate this world.

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