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  1. #761
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    Hi ladies,

    Can I join in? I am nearly 9 weeks pregnant with donor eggs after 2 miscarriages with my own eggs. One in May and one in December last year.

    I am struggling big time with stress about this pregnancy failing. I've had four bleeds but after the first couple I still saw bub via scan with a good HB and no sign of where the bleed came from. I've been a little less worried about bleeds since the although they still rattle me.

    Did anything help you not to stress? Any coping mechanisms I could try or do I just need to bide my time?

    Coincidentally, today is the due date for my second pregnancy. I didn't feel that was impacting me but maybe it is subconsciously.

    Sorry, I haven't read much of this thread. I just saw it and had a sudden urge to connect with others who might understand where my brain is at.

    X

  2. #762
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsErinR View Post
    Hi ladies,

    Can I join in? I am nearly 9 weeks pregnant with donor eggs after 2 miscarriages with my own eggs. One in May and one in December last year.

    I am struggling big time with stress about this pregnancy failing. I've had four bleeds but after the first couple I still saw bub via scan with a good HB and no sign of where the bleed came from. I've been a little less worried about bleeds since the although they still rattle me.

    Did anything help you not to stress? Any coping mechanisms I could try or do I just need to bide my time?

    Coincidentally, today is the due date for my second pregnancy. I didn't feel that was impacting me but maybe it is subconsciously.

    Sorry, I haven't read much of this thread. I just saw it and had a sudden urge to connect with others who might understand where my brain is at.

    X
    Of course you're welcome to join. Congrats on your pregnancy. I'm sorry to hear it is still full of anxiety with bleeds, it's hard enough going through pregnancy after a miscarriage. A few of us have had bleeding in pregnancy and still carrying healthy bubbas so hopefully you are one of these. I had some minor spotting at 8 and 13 weeks, with my miscarriage it started with spotting at 8 weeks so that was super nerve racking.

    As for how you get through it, well I know for me I had to almost disconnect myself from being pregnant, I would just focus on getting to the next milestone (scan, dr appt, blood test) and even though I had an early loss that didn't stop the anxiety still being there the further I got along. Even now at close to 35 weeks I still feel some disbelief about a happy ending.

    I'm not sure if that helps at all, but we're all here for support whatever you need.

  3. #763
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    Thanks Green Cheese. Your message has made a difference to me. I think that even though I wanted to try to enjoy this pregnancy I'm just not due to stress. It sounds bad possibly but I think a bit of healthy disconnection might just be good for me right now. At least until I get to a less precarious stage.

  4. #764
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    @MrsErinR, welcome! It sounds like you've had a tough time already with this pregnancy so your stress is completely understandable.

    I've felt a great deal of anxiety and stress in the lead up to each milestone during this pregnancy, be it regular scans, blood tests, drs appointments. I noticed a big difference in how I felt once we got past the 19-week scan and were told everything was OK. But I still get nervous before my appointments, afraid of what I'm going to be told.

    I was in a bad place early on and, I don't know if I've said it in this thread before, but I actually went and did and perinatal anxiety/depression course, as well as reading some books on anxiety and practicing some of the techniques that I've learned from that. That's not going to be for everyone but it really helped me work through some of my issues.

    For me, I'm trying to take it one day at a time. You can break it down even more than that if you need to - hour by hour if that's what it takes! I also set aside time each day to "be present" - just take in what's going on around me and not think, just notice. I learned to meditate too, which has helped me to learn to breathe properly as shallow breathing will make anxiety/stress worse.

    I think once you've had a miscarriage it's really hard to be positive about the future. there's that little bit of dread hanging over you. But I think not looking too far ahead and avoiding the "what ifs" is a good approach.

  5. #765
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    Hi ladies

    Thanks for your feedback and support. I just wanted to tell you that I found bub's hb on my doppler tonight. So excited. This has done wonders for my state of mind! :-)

    X

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to MrsErinR For This Useful Post:

    Bluebirdgirl  (24-07-2014),Cat74  (27-07-2014),Green Cheese  (24-07-2014)

  7. #766
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    Wonderful news @MrsErinR

    How is everyone doing? Anyone else's family making them crazy at the moment? I just don't have the capacity to deal with everyone's drama lately. Not much is different in my life, just being heavily pregnant is making me so much more frustrated with them! My husband and I don't get along well at the best of times and even though I'm close to my mother we have many disagreements over stuff. Right now I feel like I have no one to rely on.

  8. #767
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    @Bluebirdgirl, I'm sorry that you feel you don't have anyone to rely on. That would be really hard, particularly now that you don't have too long to go.

    I always feel like the referree of my family. My Dad and I don't get along at all and he is so totally disinterested in his grandchild that he thinks he's due in November, not September.

    I get on well with my mum but she is one of those passive-aggressive types so I've kept my distance for self-preservation. I talk to her on the phone and pop over occasionally but TBH I'm really enjoying my time at home chilling out without having to deal with too many other people and their dramas.

    Like you, being pregnant and tired all the time, my patience for BS is at an all time low. I should come with "handle with care" stickers.

  9. #768
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    I think it's just more no one gets me. Everyone will try to do something I guess, but my mother recently broke my trust and I have a hard time fully trusting my husband because he just isn't as attentive to everything as I am.

    Think I'm officially in nesting mode, or I'm just p'd off, because I want to clean everything! I clean when I'm mad usually.
    I'm always grouchy when pregnant, this being the 7th time for me with mum and 4th with my husband you would think they would cut me some slack by now.
    Hopefully my energy can keep up with my cleaning bug otherwise I'll start getting more frustrated!

  10. #769
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluebirdgirl View Post
    I think it's just more no one gets me. Everyone will try to do something I guess, but my mother recently broke my trust and I have a hard time fully trusting my husband because he just isn't as attentive to everything as I am.

    Think I'm officially in nesting mode, or I'm just p'd off, because I want to clean everything! I clean when I'm mad usually.
    I'm always grouchy when pregnant, this being the 7th time for me with mum and 4th with my husband you would think they would cut me some slack by now.
    Hopefully my energy can keep up with my cleaning bug otherwise I'll start getting more frustrated!
    How are you feeling mood wise now bluebirdgirl? I want to clean sooo badly but I'm running out of energy!! So I just think about cleaning a lot, lol.

    36 weeks today! Here's a bump pic.

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1406510635.787653.jpg

  11. #770
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    A little better thanks @Colbie
    You look good! I'm tall with a long torso and always carry low. The comments from strangers have started, it gets a bit annoying. I'm sure they think the baby is going to fall right out. I wish it were that easy!

    Today is a year since I had the ultrasound that showed we had lost our 6th baby.
    I don't really feel much at all actually. It seems such a world away and I've been so preoccupied with this pregnancy and much more tangible baby. I had moments a few months ago where I thought a lot about it, maybe that was the final part of the grieving process for me? It was always hard to understand my feelings because the pregnancy was so unexpected and such an awful time in our lives at that point. Everything was going wrong. I was counting on that ultrasound to give me hope and to finally bond with the idea of another baby, and then it was all over.
    I was so depressed during the time I was pregnant too. For the time I knew I kept trying to talk myself into being happy and that things would be ok.

    Does anyone else get that at all? Not feeling sad any more?
    I know if the baby had been planned it would have been so much harder, but I hadn't invested anything into the pregnancy beforehand like I had with all of my other kids who were so wanted at that certain point.

    This baby was a surprise too but I had started thinking about ttc and that I would like to at least try one last time, so I felt ready for it more.

    This date has been on my mind on and off all year, wondering how I'd feel about it. Now it's here it just seems like a dream.
    I'm sure no one else in my family will remember the date and I don't really feel like reminding them so thanks for being here to get it off my chest


 

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