I am so sorry x
Thinking of you OP
The hormones your body release at the end of labour I found really helped me to cope when I saw him and apreciate that he was a sweet little thing and I had made soemthing amazing even though it hadn't worked out xoxo
It doesn't matter what he looks like - your baby will be beautiful xoxo
Have been told about Heartfelt?
I lost my baby too, at 25 weeks. We were not able to have them at the hospital but ended up having them at her funeral... We have some beautiful photos and memories of our baby girl now.
I'm sorry if that sounds very practical.
I'm sorry you have to go through this - you're in my thoughts xoxo
I've been reading along this thread and I have to say my heart goes out to you and your husband. Reading your last post had me in tears. I'm so sorry this is happening you you, and that it has happened to all the gorgeous mummy's out there. As much as you don't feel it now, I'm in awe of your strength. I'm not a religious person but I will be asking god, the universe, who/whatever is up there and in charge to watch over you during this difficult time. Bless you, your DH and your sweet, precious little baby.
I'm sorry that it's dragging on for you both, but you sound like you are being unbelievably strong.
Do whatever feels right for you after your angel is born. I was extremely anxious and terrified about seeing my son after the birth. I actually had the midwives take him initially while I had a shower and calmed down somewhat. Then we asked for him to be brought in when we were ready and we had a very emotional few hours together. It was very very hard at the time but I am so glad for that time when I look back on it now. I think it does really help with grieving and moving forward.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow xxx
Definitely get in touch with Heartfelt. We unfortunately didn't know about them but many women in my support group used them and the photos are amazing, such a treasure to have in the coming years.
Here's their link: http://www.heartfelt.org.au
I don't want this to be upsetting, but because he is still alive, he will probably be in pretty good shape when he arrives, if you do find you want to unwrap him and explore his little body or have him placed on your chest when he's born. Your midwife will be really good at making that judgement call.
Our daughter passed away about a week before so her little body had started to show signs of deteriorating which is why the midwife thought it best we didn't see her until she was cleaned up and wrapped. She was tiny but not as 'scary' as I had imagined. You could tell she looked like my husband. My husband was very unsure about holding/seeing her but never voiced this because he knew I wanted to, he says he's so grateful he did. We both feel it helped with the grieving process. The rest of your life you'll have so many unanswered questions about him because he couldn't stay with you but knowing what it was like to hold him and what he looked like will be one you don't have to have.
My biggest advice is to take your time with him, don't feel rushed. It's never going to feel like enough time but take as much as you need. X
Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 14-01-2014 at 20:50.
I agree holly heartfelt were amazing. The hospital originally told me angus would be too much for me to handle but they also said he was going to be about half the size he was. Feel free to hold him naked or wrapped. I got angus wrapped then they dressed him and I got another cuddle.
I had to go to surgery afterwards so I'm kinda sad I missed him naked and being weighed etc. I feel like I wanted to memorize everything about him and didn't get the chance I stare at his photos some days
Angus 4~6~13, loved - wanted - missed
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